wyldride

June would have Memento for these movies, if only she remembered the movie Memento.

My recollection is that this never quite came together as a story, but didn't have much in the way of "bonkers" material that would lend itself to working for the podcast. Although I don't necessarily recall it all that well.

"You only have to get half way to the moon before its gravity takes over." - Space Cowboys and this thing, probably.

How many "X has to do Y to save A from B" movies are they gonna make? I mean, that sounds awfully general, but you know what I'm talking about. How many evil property developers are out there, anyway?

It would be impossible to say anything funnier about this movie than the movie itself. It is less funny to mock this movie than to simply watch it.

Since they won't let you do Sharknados, how about pitching a new property. I'd like to suggest: Baboon Monsoon!

"I don't recall ever owning any medical robots." - Obi-wan P. I.

"These robots are, like, Zumbas?" "They do a bunch of dance exercise routines?" "Sure, why not?" "OK, then."

Also there's a little something called Great Balls of Fire, except that really happened.

I was saying Zooks-urns! Also Jun-urns.

In my opinion, it never came together into a coherent story. Sometimes movies just don't make the transition from a bunch of things that happened to a proper storyline, and it's not always obvious why. It just lacked the "Oh, so that's why you're telling me this" moment.

Soundtrack is probably listed first because it's the best thing in the movie. Frankly the video for her song made it seem like a better movie. There were a few things in this movie that were not bad, but mostly in the non-Newton -John/Travolta stuff. It almost seemed like they made one movie with Newton-John and Travolta and either they didn't have enough material or it just didn't work, so they wrapped aròund it with another plot. Still, overall, kind of a fun watch.

Van Damme doesn't actually give a damn about the girl or the other assassin. He seemed more concerned that they put the turtle upside down than the dead girl in his bed. So, why didn't the bureaucrats just hire Van Damme to kill the other assassin? At the end of the day, the bad guy didn't have much trouble finding his house. Why this complicated game?

"Look, Paul, I'm not writing you a new Second Opinions theme: You haven't even used the Corrections&Omissions theme I already wrote you. Maybe once you use that one, I'll consider it."

In the mythology of the conception of Star Wars, Lucas wrote a huge story, realized it was too big, chopped off the 2/3 at the end and made the beginning as the first movie. Things like teaching Wookiees to fly ships to take down the Death Star sort of survived as Ewoks helping Solo take out the force field projector. This movie seems like, instead of chopping off the end, they cut the whole story down by removing all the supporting structures. Look, for example, at how rushed the Lando-like arc of Stinger is of switching from ally to betrayer and back to ally. Was the daughter who went missing from the plot kidnapped and ransomed to explain his allegiance shift? Who knows?!? Lucas, or whoever he had around at the beginning who understood storytelling (Kurtz), managed to make a world where you were plunged straight into it and yet you still understood the stakes. This thing is just a parade of "wtf?!?" and "who cares?!?" scenes. Honestly, it seems like they looked at Star Wars and thought, "Let's make a story like Star Wars, with the story beats of the original trilogy, but make it more like the prequels -- And compress it down into one incomprehensible mess of a movie."

A quick "that does not mean what you think it means": Non-plussed means overwhelmed. It'a like, you are shocked into silence and you can't take anymore. Jason uses it in the, admittedly common, wrong way to suggest indifference. Ok, carry on ...

Random thought from relistening to this ep: Olivia NJ's character at the end is the woman from the 7 sisters painting, who is NOT Kira. She is a struggling actress/model working as a waitress. One of her jobs was posing for that album cover. When the muses come down to earth at the start of the movie they take their forms from that wall art where they located the portal from olympus. That's why they are checking out their new forms. Fast forward to the end, as a final gift, after Kira is allowed to return for a farewell at the club, the gods arrange for the girl whose appearance she was using to get a job at the club to throw her into Sonny's path. Of course they've never really met, so she has no idea who he is.

It's kinda hilarious that normally they use all the Greek names, except Hercules which is Roman(should be Heracles). However in this they use the Roman names, except for Zeus(should be Jupiter). I don't know if there's ever been a production that's consistently used one or the other. Really, it's pretty standard to start from a point of an unhappy character wanting a different life, but not understanding what that entails. Of course, normally you'd expect that character to progress from there. I guess in this case, Hercules is already perfect. Of course, in Greek mythology, the gods just come to Earth and slum it and don't really care about the mortals they mess with. So that's accidentally consistent. Instead of trying to pimp out one of the goddesses, Herc could totally just get his buddy Cupid to do the arrow thing for Pretzie. I mean, that's not better, but at least it's consistent with the mythology.

So, how does the depiction of immortality in this and Zardoz compare to the Q continuum depicted as an endlessly looping highway and a gas station?

Whoever made it knew something we don't because it made an obscene return on investment: 35M for a mere 4M.

Yep. I think they establish him as of age in the jurisdiction. Also, he's not yet her student when they have sex, so it's not a "position of trust" situation. I'm basing this on second hand information, though, and haven't seen it myself.

Not so much for itself, but it would make a good companion to the Fast&Furious movies. It is surprisingly funny for an X movie style parody.

Maybe. Also, some thought should have been given to shelving the project that glorifies reckless driving, since he died in a car crash. But people aren't gonna throw away money in Hollywood.

Love the gymnastics used to do this movie, but not have J-Lo be a pedo. Yes, it's perfectly reasonable that an adult is in her high school class.

Well, as with any movie of this type, it involves a lot of willing suspension of Habeas Corpus.