Cam Bert

It would be hard I think. I heard Robert Paulson (Pinky from Pinky and the Brain, as well as the original Rapheal) once say that he's tried for years to get him to do a podcast episode with him and he wouldn't do it, and John DiMaggio couldn't even get him to be in his voice actor documentary that he made. He apparently is just kinda a shy guy that doesn't seek the limelight and just wants to play golf.

According to the credits the versatile voice actor Frank Welker is credited with dog sounds.

Exactly. This is a good point. There is a difference between making something kid friendly but enjoyable to all like say a Pixar film apposed to making something and marketing it solely for kids. Like this movie clearly is not for Chuck Norris fans, but it's got some themes which are not great for kids, so who is it for exactly? Dads trying to bond with their kids? Neither of them will leave happy.

Wow. I wonder if this is some sort of revenge for fights they had when they were younger. I'm only 30 minutes in and I think this is one of the best worst ones they've picked.

Okay, I just started watching this movie and my mind is already blown. Just off hand, I noticed the movie was directed and story by Aaron Norris. Is he Chuck Norris's son?

I wonder if the "Row, Row, Row you Boat" was an homage to Dirty Harry and the school bus in that... Anyway, Invasion USA would a fantastic movie for the podcast. Hell, any Canon Films movie from the 80 would be perfect for this podcast.

Is that Jokerman font?

First things first, thanks to Paul for the kind shout out and I'd like to point out that I am indeed male. When Paul was talking about this movie in the minisode I just assumed it was the Canon Films Chuck Norris rip off of "Turner & Hooch" and "K-9." Nope. This came out a full 6 years after those movies. Really late to the game on this one Chuck Norris.

I also find it curious that neither him nor the daughter seem to morn or care about the deaths of their friends. However, maybe it affected them on a deep psychological level making them numb to the tragedy around them, and that is why he decided to wait outside.

For me the biggest laugh I got out of this movie was a quick moment towards the beginning after receiving the golden chainsaw Fin is being pestered by a reporter. He waves for Mark McGrath to come over and help him get out of it. Mark was about to eat something, but instead folds it neatly into a napkin and stick it into his breast pocket. It was something that looked like cottage cheese on a cucumber, how is that suppose to last wrapped up let alone put in a pocket? Part of me really hopes this was a choice made by Mark McGrath who, and I can't believe I'm saying this, needed to be in this movie more.

This explains how she became an expert on street fighting.

All my facts and figures are brought to you by "being single" in proud partnership with "being on vacation with nothing to do."

I am always fascinated by the Sharknado films and how they deal with time and place. I was overall really impressed with this movie for their actual somewhat realistic depiction of time and distance this time around. Based on Fin and April's first cell phone conversation, the presidential medal of freedom ceremony was the previous day and he is calling here somewhere on the drive to Orlando from Washington DC. She is already in the park meaning that this conversation has to take someplace after 8:00AM which is when the park opens. Now, things for Fin take a turn when he gets to Charleston, SC. The driving time from Washington DC to Charleston is approximately 7 hours and 43 minutes. Add some extra time for the chaos that ensued and say 8 hours and 30 minutes or so. Then Fin takes a "supersonic" fighter jet from Charleston. Assuming they are flying at mach 1 which is about 1200 kmph, we next see Fin at Daytona which is about 500km away so it took approximately 24 minutes. Then they crash in Orlando, which is 90 km from Daytona so say as they were crashing it took them 10 minutes due to decreased speed. Then then hop into race cars and drive to Cape Canaveral which is approximately an hour drive away. Adding this all up the time it took Fin to get to Cape Canaveral is 10 to 11 hours if you factor in all the shark fighting and talking. We have no idea exactly what time Fin left DC but if we assume he left sometime the night before or got up at 4am to start driving, we can assume the local time in the shot of the count down clock in Cape Canaveral reading 18:31:20 makes sense. However this is where things fall off the rails. After that shot of the countdown clock we then see Fin being suited up. This is followed by the Sharknado hitting Cape Canaveral, April and Fin getting into the shuttle, and Nova jumping into a fighter jet to clear a path for them. We cut back to the count down clock and the local time now reads 18:31:24. 4 seconds! All of that took place in the span of 4 seconds! Despite mission controls statements of launch in 5 minutes and 10 minutes they showed a close up of a clock twice and only a matter of 4 seconds had passed! Unless this is some Tarantino inspired shots out of order scenario, the timing makes no sense. Finally at the end of the movies Gil has to get from the Star Wars satellite to the moon. We can safely assume the satellite is somewhere around 37000 km above the earth as that would put it into geostationary orbit. The moon, at it's closest to Earth is about 405,000 km away, making the minimal distance David Hasselhoff would have had to travel to get to the moon around 368,000 km. There is no way he could have survived that let alone get their in time to salute his grandson being born. However all that said, none of it explains the strangest timing problem of them all and that is why the Today Show seems to always be on TV no matter the time of day.

I know there is way too much going on in this movie for them to cover everything, but I'm most shocked that Scott never talked about Hasselhoff's name. Scott bemoans the fact that Ian Ziering's character is named Fin and they justify it by saying his name is Finley. They do the exact same shark body part joke with his father, whose name is Gilbert but most people just simply call him Gil. A joke which further gets hammered home upon the birth of his son. Fin says that he wants to name it after his father. April goes "Gilbert" to which Fin curtly corrects "Gil" as if a wink those people that didn't pick up on it during the last 30 minutes when people kept calling his dad that.

Sorry to create a topic like this, as this board doesn't really seem to have that many non-show threads, but it's something I've been wondering for awhile. Recently I have been interested in getting back into this podcast, so If any of you regular listeners can answer a few questions for me it'd be greatly appreciated. 1. Do they still use music bumpers? If so is there a variety of genres and have they balanced the volume and tone between the music and talking? 2. Does Jack O'Brien still host every episode? If so, has he improved in his hosting skills? 3. When people phone in or skype in, has the quality improved? 4. Are they basically like an article someone has written presented as a conversation, or are they more free based discussion on a topic? Do they alternate the style? Thank you for any answers you provide. So when this show first started I was very eager to listen to it being a big fan of the Cracked website and most of their articles. I started listening to it, but there were just more and more growing issues with things I was unhappy with that I decided to drop it around episode 20 or so. I see the topics for episodes pop up and I'm interested in what they have to say but I think back to how much I was disliking the show and grow timid to go back.

I'm now on vacation and I decided to kick things off with Sharknado 3. It was boring, and I didn't get half the cameos. The problem is also why nothing Tommy Wiseau has done since "The Room" works. Once people know their terrible movies are being laughed at, they decide that everything they do will be comedy and try to make things funny. This kills the fun and humor because they don't actually know how to be funny or why exactly people were enjoying it.

I kinda poked fun of it in my above comment but did anybody else notice how oddly highly educated people were criminals in this film? In the chip betrayal scene the scientist constantly refers to Gene Simmons as Dr. Luther. So he's using his real name, and he seems to know what he's looking at in that microscope. We can also assume he invented the spiderbots and his bullets and gun. Yet later in the movie when he's identified he's a convicted murdered with mob ties. So he's a engineering or robotics PhD who also happens to be a sociopath and mobster? Crazy. Also the "guineas" and "hoods"(the chief's words not mine) that Luther was meeting with at the Ritz. According the the cop who talked to Ramsey when he arrived they had degrees from Cal Tech and MIT and well as very Italian names. This brings up a much larger and more interesting story about the mob reaching out to scientist in the future to help them.

Hold onto your hats guys and gals because I think we're all overlooking something huge here. In a movie full of wonderful future technology the biggest one and most fantastic one is also the one that nobody is talking about! Gene Simmon's "Dr." Luther has invented... density control or matter phasing! Just like Marvel's Vision, Luther and his robots can walk through solid objects! No? Don't believe me? Two scenes clearly demonstrate this. The first is the shoot out/hostage scene in the house at the beginning. Now after the death of the camera guy Tom Selleck was fired upon twice. Now based on how the shots came through the wall the robot had to have been on the other side of the wall. If it was firing from the hallway the bullets would have gone through two walls not just the one. Next we see Tom Selleck dive behind a baby jumpy chair and go into a closed room on the opposite side of the hallway. Then after he dives behind a bed we see the the bathroom door opposite the bed open. These robots are about a foot tall or so and cannot reach the height of a door knob, and this one cannot turn a door knob because it is too busy holding a gun in its lone hand. How did this robot bot get from one side of the hall to the other and get behind two closed doors while still holding its gun? Obviously when Luther was giving it the gun and fitting it with a kill chip he also gave it the ability to phase through walls! Still not convinced? Let's look at the death and betrayal of the chip maker who may or may not have had a name. After showing the chip templates to Luther they retire to a closet that has been turned into a changing room or locker room with a windowed door so pervs can easily spy in on people. It's a tight small room, and while the scientist is distracted by the sentry on rounds Luther makes his escape. However the scientist is at the only door in the room, and when he turns around Luther is nowhere to be scene. There is nowhere else to go in that room. If there was the scientist would have looked for Luther or they would have done their shady deal not right in front of a window that anyone walking along the hallway can look in and see them from. Instead the scientist eagerly sits down to open the briefcase only the be killed by a spiderbot which was hidden well in advance of Luther knowing where the chips were kept. We can only assume that Luther using his mater phasing technology went through the walls and followed the other scientist who happened to stumble across this murderous betrayal just a few seconds too late. The proof is clear, "Dr." Luther has this incredible phasing technology which he seems to only use sometimes.

When I was a kid I loved TMNT and this song infuriated me. Towards the end of the song he calls out Raphael and claims he's the leader of the team. I do believe the TV theme song which predates the movie and and this song says Leonardo is the leader which he clearly is because Raphael is the angst filled loner and angst filled loners don't lead teams.

I want to expand a little what Cameron H said about Donatello and the clown and how it goes towards the greater issue of people's seemingly non-reaction to the turtles. Throughout the movie characters meet and interact with the turtles and their reactions are never consistent to seemingly non-existent. In the beginning of the movie when Keno stumbles into the robbery (side note: why does the one robber reveals his masked face to a witness and did like 30 guys came in two vans?) the turtles jump in and help. His initial reaction? A horrible double take. A little weak but expected. The robbers? Nothing. No double takes or confusion to be had. Then we get to the clown scene. As Cameron H points out Donatello leaves the fight and finds this clown and comes up with a gag to take out one guy. He sits and waits pretending to be a giant inflatable toy turtle or something until a robber comes by him. Now these guys have been fighting these giant men turtles for a little while and the robber's first thought is, "Hey is that a that giant turtle toy." It is not "That looks like the people we've been fighting." Then when Donatello comes to life the robber flees in terror. Was he scared because he thought a toy that looks like the people they've been fighting came to life or because it was a mutant turtle which he's already seen his co-robbers fighting? Then the Foot ninjas never seem shocked because they've probably heard of the turtles I guess. Finally all the club goers and Vanilla Ice are initially shocked a little and then just assume they're all just in costumes and accept it all no problem. Not one person flees in terror, they just simply back up in terror. Then they quickly ignore it all and accept it as normal. You'd think more people would be terrified or fainting. Speaking of... Keno who simply gives a double take and accepts the turtles faints when he sees Splinter. Is a talking rat that much more shocking for a person who is basically indifferent towards giant fighting turtles? I only point this out because David Werner gives a similar dumbfounded shock reaction to seeing Splinter too. While he's fascinated by the turtles, seemingly indifferent to Toka and Rahzar, yet upon seeing Splinter he's left in shock and disbelief. Is a giant rat really that much more incredible or less likely than a mutant turtles who are not even native to New York sewers?

I think a little bit needed to be said about the wedding scene. It looks as if it is in some sort of grand church with these massive stone pillars and arches. However, it's all on Titus's spaceship. It's not a separate building or even on some planet, it's on his space ship. Titus built a church hall in his space ship with giant stone pillars! How do we know that it's all stone? When Caine crashes through the wall the sound effect is off crumbling stone and we see debris is just broken stone. No metal or anything, just stone. Also, if Caine is crashing his ship through the wall into the church wouldn't that create some sort of vacuum and suck everyone out into space or at least suck all the oxygen out? Or did the ship perfectly plug it up? Also, why would Titus build a stone church with statues on the very front of his ship? So many questions!!!

Maybe you didn't catch it, but did you hear what the elephant guy's name was? Nesh, as in Ganesh the Hindu god who happens to look like an Elephant. All the names in the movie drove me crazy. It's like "He-Man" all over again. "Okay we have a man covered in moss? Moss Man! Great! Now a bad guy with two heads... Hmm... Two Bad!"

KINDA OMISSION: While I know somebody early on mentioned this but the naming is all over the place. All the characters are suppose to be from Greek mythology but they used mostly the Roman naming. Juno, Mercury, and Pluto are the Roman names for Hera, Hermes, and Hades. Heck even Hercules should have been Heracles. However, they kept Apollo and Zeus as is. This wouldn't bother me so much if the movie didn't go out of it's way to point this out! When Mr. Turtle Pretzie was rereading the book on mythology he stole borrowed he reads aloud "Hercules, half god half man, was the son of Jupiter or Zeus as he was known to the Greeks." Why include this line? Why not just say son of Zeus? Why acknowledge you are aware they have different names?

As a life long Marvel zombie it delighted me to no end to hear Inhuman talk. However, I must point out that the goat legged guy that stomps on things is Gorgon and Karnak is the one that finds the weak points and chops at them. That said this some stellar C+ stuff right here.

The other day,, my friend asked me what my favourite new podcast of the past year was. With out hesitation I said "U Talkin' U2 To Me?" When they asked me if they would enjoy it not really knowing much about U2 I told them that it was the complete compendium of all things U2. They decided to start with this episode first for some odd reason. Their review, "Why make a podcast about U2 if you don't even spend a third of your time talking about them. I just don't get it." ... I don't think I can friends with them anymore...