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JordanMaywood

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Everything posted by JordanMaywood

  1. JordanMaywood
    Pineapple on pizza is bad. Pizza on Pineapple is worse. Nice try Spongerobert Pleated Pants!
  2. JordanMaywood
    Challah Bread At Your Goy!
  3. JordanMaywood
    Welcome one and all! Except Alaskan Monkey Butlers. You can go fudge yourself.
  4. JordanMaywood
    A podcast with interviews of interesting people!? Sign me up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, Start !
  5. JordanMaywood
    Pro-Tip! An egg timer can time things other than eggs. #LifeHack
  6. JordanMaywood
    Jules Verne wrote about my penis in a little novel by the name of "Journey to the Centre of the Girth."
  7. JordanMaywood
    So long suckies I am moving to the Yukon and opening up a cold dog stand!
  8. JordanMaywood
    My name is Scott Aukerman and if you believe that I have some Swamp Thing comics I can sell you!
  9. JordanMaywood
    If you want to be the toast of the town you need a lot of bread....and a toaster that makes money.
  10. JordanMaywood
    My gluten hoard exploded when people started giving it away for free everywhere! Yatzee!
  11. JordanMaywood
    Piccadilly Square is actually more of a kumquat which is why my pillows are made from heart medication.
  12. JordanMaywood
    Time is the fire in which we burn...Our S'mores!
  13. JordanMaywood
    I like my nuts how I like my waxes how I like my words that sound like large numbers... #Brazilian
  14. JordanMaywood
    Bill should be short for Billiam.
  15. JordanMaywood
    Billboard Fabricators have an easy time deciding how to advertise.
  16. JordanMaywood
    Punching in need of Joke 42-X-3B: Peter Cotton/Poly Blend Tale.
  17. JordanMaywood
    If you were caught by a super sexual zombie if would likely blow your mind and then your brain.
  18. JordanMaywood
    Shakespeare AKA The Immortal Bard used to dominate on the playground growing up! The called him The Play Right Playwright!
  19. JordanMaywood
    Call me an optimist but I prefer "Watership Up", "Angela's Cozy Fire" and "To Life a Mockingbird."
  20. JordanMaywood
    I've heard of a lightning bolt but a lightning nut!?
  21. JordanMaywood
    Keep your arm curls! I curl up with a good book!
  22. JordanMaywood
    At clown college to they have an award for class serious person!?
  23. JordanMaywood
    If you do not speak English the word "indescribable" becomes indescribable.
  24. JordanMaywood
    If you are deciding which to fuck don't confuse your Flubber with your Flowbee.
  25. JordanMaywood
    I hate to be a wet blanket but I am a sentient blanket who fell in a lake...
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