If I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have if I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have...

[If I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have if I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have...]

If I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have if I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have, I'd have enough dimes to give a dime to everybody who asked me how many dimes I'd have if I had a dime for everytime somebody asked me how many dimes I'd have.

[Are you there, God? It's me, bigboobslover1986. I forgot my password again]

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[In Soviet Russia, the Titanic goes down on the band]

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[Hamburglary is a felony offense in this town, mister, and I can assure you that Judge McRib takes a very hard stance against it]

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[Out of all the cats packed onto this plane, I can't believe it was Mr. Sprinkles who figured out how to land it]

He always seemed to be somewhat of a problem cat, but he came through in the end, I guess

[Do I have to spell it out for you? A-N-T-I-D-I-S-E-S-T-A-B-L-I-S-H-M-E-N-T-A-R-I-A-N-I-S-M]

Do I have to spell it out for you? A-N-T-I-D-I-S-E-S-T-A-B-L-I-S-H-M-E-N-T-A-R-I-A-N-I-S-M

[There's a funny smell coming from my neighbor's apartment. Downright hilarious, actually]

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[I am "Weed" Richards, leader of the Fantastic 420. The only thing I can stretch is my mind]

More of a catch-premise, I guess

[I hate to break it to you, Popeye, but your son has "Blow Me Down" syndrome]

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[Polygamy timbers!]

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[Baa, baa, Night Court, have you any Bull? Yes, sir, yes, sir, nine seasons full]

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[We apologize for the typo in our brochure, but we hope you'll enjoy your stay here at Parasite Island nonetheless]

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[For some reason, ticket sales have only increased since our specimen of Panthera pardus suffered irreparable hearing loss]

Our marketing team is still trying to determine the reason

[Here's an interesting fact about Canada's political system. Ha ha, just kidding]

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[Where did Mr. Fluffypants go? He went to the place that all cats go when they die, honey. The big freezer in the basement]

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[Fun fact, Mother Teresa is burning in hell for all eternity]

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[Hey Obama, want a job at Earwolf? The only catch is you'll have to call ME "mister president"!]

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[As I was going to St. Ives, I met a man with seven wives and I'm like, leave some for the rest of us, buddy!]

How many were there going to St. Ives? None, because of the travel ban

[The world doesn't owe you any flavors]

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[Tonight on Breaking Good: Drug kingpin Walter Black takes another step closer to becoming a high school teacher]

I would srsly watch that

[All I needed was a plain cake. The icing on the cake was just icing on the cake]

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[Cuttlefish have the ability to camouflage themselves in any nearly environment. Right now mine is disguised as a plate of deep-fried nuggets]

Yum

[Elvis lives!]

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[My favorite dish is also my favorite pair of TV shows from the 70s: Fish and CHiPS]

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[Thought it was time for a bowel movement, but no dice. Really starting to wish I never swallowed those dice]

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