Blast Hardcheese

Awesome! I can't wait to hear it. Oh, and before I forget to mention it: The workout show from the 80's Paul was trying to remember I believe was called The 20-Minute Workout. It used to come on right after morning G.I. Joe cartoons on the local UHF channel in my hometown (what a combo that programming was!) This workout show even has a cameo in the classic Eddie Murphy/Nick Nolte film 48 Hours (the scene where they bust into the bad guy's girlfriend's apartment looking for info).

Around the 49:32 mark, Paul mentions Chelsea Field who has "...been in the last three movies we have done," which are Masters of the Universe, Perfect and Death Spa. Does this mean the next episode will be Death Spa? And if so, are we going to get a HDTGM/Red Letter Media crossover episode? http://redlettermedia.com/best-of-the-worst-high-voltage-death-spa-and-space-mutiny/

My Top 5 of the Year: 1). Maximum Overdrive 2.) Face/Off 3.) Furious 7 4.) Tango and Cash 5.) Con Air Top Movies Covered This Year (and why): 1.) Maximum Overdrive (FINALLY!!! And well worth the wait). 2.) Deep Blue Sea (Trying to out-Jaws Jaws, and failing miserably - despite a rap song about being a shark). 3.) Sharknadoo (The HDTGM crew realizing - hopefully - that this franchise has plateaued). 4.) Masters of the Universe (That hemorrhoid creature's gravy beard work cannot be denied). 3.) Furious 7 (Again: FINALLY!!! So worth the wait). I would also like to take this opportunity to nominate the joy-by-attrition classic, Christmas with the Cranks, as this year's HDTGM holiday movie.

So, this is a dream-come-true episode for me. Thanks, Paul, June, Jason, and Andy! Corrections and omissions: * My favorite part of this film happens when we see everyone in the Dixie Boy waking up in the morning. Out of no where, the two double doors from the kitchen swing open violently and standing there is a wild-eyed trucker who yells, "What the fuck is going on around here?!?" I have a feeling the "actor" came up with this hi-lar-ious bit, and King just ran with it. * So, the kid is being chased on his BMX bike by a lawnmower. Do push mowers have engines that power it's wheels, or even have steering mechanisms? I know riding lawnmowers have both, but the kind of mowers you push? * Stephen King is famous for butting heads with Stanley Kubrick, who directed what can arguably be called the greatest adaptation of King's work: The Shining. And, that film is masterfully scary. So here we have Stephen King, given the resources to do Stephen King's writings justice, and what do we get? Maximum Overdrive. I wonder if King looks back on his clashes with Kubrick and feels humbled or ashamed. * King promises in the trailer that he is going to "...scare the hell out of you." This film, however, is not even remotely scary. Like at all. It's perplexing and sometimes gross to be sure, but not freighting. There is no real suspense, scares, chills, or anything resembling immediate dread in it. We get the premise - machines coming to life and killing people – but, the film seems to ignore any potential moment of vicarious thrill or suspense. To give you an example, when the newlyweds approach the small gas station and see a bloody man on the ground, the groom walks up to the gas station's window to peer inside. I thought for sure something was going to jump out at him and give us a good scare. Nope. What do we get instead? A truck starts its engine off camera then slowly ambles out to threaten the couple. Then there is the finale, where Emilio Estevez simply shoots the Goblin truck with a rocket launcher. Not a time's-running-out, last-second-dash-to-the-boat, fight-to-the-death. No, it's all point, shoot, boom! Done. This is a horror film without urgency or stakes. This film is lazy. Not scary. Lazy. * That machine gun golf cart jeep thing: that's the moment right there were you can tell the script had a few cocaine-fueled re-writes in order for it to attempt to make any sense. * The truck with the toilet paper: are those rolls loose and not crated in boxes? * The waitress staring longingly at the photo in the frame when everyone’s coming to grips with the trucks circling the truck stop. Why? * Did anyone else notice all of the Jack Chick comic pamphlets on the dashboard of the Bible salesman's car? Seems accurate enough for a Bible salesman. But... Bible salesman? Is that a thing? Not to be offensive, but isn't this like being a phone book salesman? I mean, aren't Bible's free, essentially? * That scene in the bathroom, where Emilio is asking the pig-snout guy (who's taking a loud, sloppy shit) about the guns. Come on!!! Is fecal-based "humor" big in the south? * For a seemingly intelligent guy, Stephen King likes a lot of sophmoric, low-brow shit.

I kinda miss Out of Sight-era J. Lo. She was actually pretty great in that film.

Hey everybody! i just got back from my Ewok Adventure. What did I miss?

So glad to see this recommendation on the boards. My wife and I went to see Throwing Shade Live last Saturday here in Portland, and Erin Gibson went on a ten minute recommendation-rant for The Boy Next Door, citing it as "...the worst movie available on Netflix right now." Of course, we had to check out the trailer for this film, and damn if it doesn't look delightfully awful. We haven't brought ourselves to watch it yet, but there it is in reserve for our next movie night. Huzzah! It goes without saying, but if and when HDTGM does this movie, Erin Gibson absolutely has to be the guest. Her energy level alone qualifies her, if not her zeal for the film itself. Also, a review would help clarify exactly - as per the film's trailer - just what part of the female anatomy is/are the "cookies."

I can't wait for this one either!

Yes! I've been rallying for Maximum Overdrive for quite a while now. I just re-watched it on YouTube tonight, and man, none of the luster of this movie's wonderful horrible-ness has diminished. This is the movie Stephen King made to show artsy-fartsy directors like Stanley Kubrick how to make a godamned Stephen King movie the right way! *SNOOOOORT!!!* Mission Accomplished! (Say what you will about Maximum Overdrive, but it's nice to see 80% of this film's horribly unlikeable characters dispatched so efficiently. So, thank you, movie.) Looking this film up on IMDB, I found that it does have its champions. Or, a champion, to put it more precisely. I won't cut and paste one Mr. Ronald Panis from the Netherlands' entire, lengthy, AC/DC-praising review here, but I will give you some of the best highlights from it: "I really cannot understand why this movie has such a bad overall rating. According to me a movie doesn't have to have a great plot or so to be appealing." And... "Maybe I'm just simple but I like the movie. Better than some not understandable romantic drama if you'd ask me." God bless the Netherlands. And God bless HDTGM for doing this movie.

My wife and I saw this on opening day with a packed, cheering house. Gawdamnit if that isn’t the perfect way to watch a movie. Honestly, I can’t remember the last time a movie-going experience felt that fun. Anyhoo, here are some of the things I felt like commenting on from Furious 7: *At the Race Wars (Seriously? C'mon!), Letty, in a post-win P.T.S.D.-fueled agoraphobic panic attack, hits a dude in the face. IN! THE!! FACE!!! His reaction? A dis-believing "wha...?" followed by an aw-shucks shrug after Dom makes him the butt of a joke. There's your testosterone-fueled machismo right there, race wars fans! *Hobbs' character is part of the military, right? Wouldn't he qualify for treatment at a military hospital? I bring this up because when Dom visits Hobbs in the hospital, there's Hobbs' hand cannon sitting on a table right next to him. This seems to be visual cue to the audience that, 1.) the gun is there for Hobbs' protection, and 2.) the hospital staff is too intimidated by Hobbs' overwhelming charisma to take a loaded weapon away from him. So, given both of these assumptions, wouldn't Hobbs be safer receiving medical attention at a military hospital/base surrounded with soldiers carrying weapons? *Who else misses Owen Shaw's henchwoman from 6? I was kind of hoping for a wide shot in Shaw's hospital room where we see her in the next bed over, also in a coma. *Speaking of missing: Gal Gadot. Wonderful, perfect Gal Gadot. She’s listed in the credits, but only seen in an photograph?!? In Furious 8, I'm hoping for a didn't-really-die resurrection. *Deckard Shaw leads Dom, Brian, Snake Plissken, and a group of G.I. Joes to his lair, knowing full well they're using the God's Eye to track him. The team is all, like, "That's where his holding up. Right there, in that cement factory." Okay, so they didn't see the small army lying in wait for them (that factory has to have cameras and the henchmen cell phones that God's Eye could easily tap into, but never mind...) But why, if the good guys know where Shaw is exactly, do they need to bring the God's Eye with them? "Oh, this super dangerous holy e-grail thing we hired this mercenary car stunt team to retrieve? Yeah, I'm bringing it with us on a black bag assignment to nab what we've now come to understand is a highly trained and unpredictable military strategist. No big deal." *I know this was mentioned earlier, but Hobbs and the drone's mini gun: how is he firing it? Does the mini gun have a trigger and pistol grip? Looking at the still of The Rock firing said mini gun that another commenter posted earlier, it appears that it does not. *The end of the film, when Brian rides off into the sunset, is pretty damned touching. I have to admit, it got me in a way I didn't think these films were capable of doing. That said, where is Brian going? He left Mia and their son back on the beach and he's riding off to... ? Was he going to circle back to the beach and continue playing in the surf with his family? Or is he simply leaving it all behind? *Also, why haven’t Vans made a memorial Paul Walker shoe, where all proceeds go to the charity of the Walker family’s choosing? Like, say, teaching inner city kids how to work on cars or providing scholarships for in-need, college-bound kids from economically challenged communities. Seems like a no-brainer. *Secret marriages? Always romantic.

Did mention the relentless nu-metal deluge, where every song sound like Drowning Pool's "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" (which just so happens to appear on this movie's soundtrack)?

I'm bumping this suggestion because I absolutely need to hear June's take on this film.

This film isn't that horrible, but it definitely has a douche bag-attraction factor to it. A Maxim magazine-reading, Axe Body Spray-doused-in, English script forearm tattoo-having, new Camero-driving, Carl's Jr.-eating-at'ing douche bag aura to it.

Someone at Buzzfeed re-watches a lot of MST3K.

Punisher: War Zone initially got me onto the HDTGM forum, too. My wife and I met Patton Oswalt at a book signing a few months ago and thanked him for intoducing us to this great podcast. He was even gracious enough to sign our DVD copy of the movie. What a mensch. As for my all-time favorite HDTGM episode, that would go to 88 Minutes with Pete Holmes. Handsdown, the funniest, most entertaining episode of the show (and that's saying a lot given this podcast's many, many, many hilarious episodes). I think I've watched this unitentionally hilarious movie more times than anyone actually should.

I'm a huge fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and it seems like a natural to have some of the comedians from that legendary show of HDTGM. Joel and/or Mike seem like naturals to me. Hell, anyone from MST3K would be amazing on this podcast. Where my Satellite of Love peeps at?

I've been watching The Venture Bros. non-stop since a friend recommended this show to me last month. I am hooked. I bought all five seasons on iTunes and the various specials. I can't recommend this brilliant and hilarious show enough.

Just watched this one on Netflix and man is it dated. Stilted and cheesy dialogue, horrid CGI and the whole "Out with Bond, in with X-treme sports spy" hubris make the idea of this film alone a splendid failure. Add to this, it's punctuated with one of Paul's favorite bad movie tropes: snowboarding. Highly entertaining and awful at the same time, xXx is so, so, SO worthy of the HDTGM treatment.

My wife and I went to go see Mad Max: Fury Road (highly recommended!) a couple of weeks ago, and were treated to an onslaught of abysmal movie previews (does anyone remember when trailers actually made you want to go see movies?) Slogging through one forgettable and unworthy preview after the next, we were treated to the the celluloid regurgitation that is Vacation. Besides boasting one of the most unambitious movie titles imaginable, we were treated to mindnumbing "comedic" faire such as cattle mutilation, a beautiful woman in a sports car getting obliterated by an 18-wheeler, our plucky heroes swimming in a lagoon of human excriment, anti-intellectualism, and Chevy Chase's fat, unfunny face. Seriously, this movie makesTomcats look like Sabrina. This fuckin' loathesome, bloated corpse of a movie looks like cancer for the soul, and I would like to preemptively recommend it here and now just to get it over with.

Correct you if you're wrong? You know that you quoted me directly, right?

Actually, I have seen Vaction, but back when it was originally called National Lampoon's Vacation. (((BOOM!)))

It sounds like you want a podcast where June talks about the movie, her role in it and her experiences making it. Something where she fields questions and comments, and reveals some juicy anecdotes and behind the scenes stuff. That sounds like something geared more towards I Was There Too than HDTGM. I think you're being a bit harsh. Ass Backwards isn't a bananas-bad film at all. I get that you're trying to think "outside the box" and differentiate yourself from the crowd here on the boards, but this isn't a good way to do that. Also, HDTGM doesn't review comedies. Hence, the lack of Sandler movies.

I nothing but completly agree with you. Lauren Becall was (and still very much is) amazing.

Amen.

Having never watched one of these movies, I have to ask: Does the "nado" part of the sharknado factor into the overall detruction? Or are the tornadoes simply a delivery device for the sharks?