If you think smoking makes you look cool, you're wrong! Nothing makes a duck look cool.

[If you think smoking makes you look cool, you're wrong! Nothing makes a duck look cool.]

If you think smoking makes you look cool, you're wrong! Nothing makes a duck look cool.

[Excuse me, sir, but I believe my pickled plums make your argument invalid.]

Excuse me, sir, but I believe my pickled plums make your argument invalid.

[Nothing can ever put you down if you're more like Patty, because Patty doesn't exist!]

Nothing can ever put you down if you're more like Patty, because Patty doesn't exist!

[Well goshdarn all that crap to freaking heck!]

Well goshdarn all that crap to freaking heck!

[Time was you saw a man dancing in the street with a bottle in his hand, you could just run up and tickle him! But now you gotta file a form first.]

Time was you saw a man dancing in the street with a bottle in his hand, you could just run up and tickle him! But now you gotta file a form first.

[Not a catchphrase, but a message to fellow catchphrase posters.]

Except this isn't a catchphrase, just a post on the catchphrase forum, so your record remains intact.

[Not a catchphrase, but a message to fellow catchphrase posters.]

This topic has been labelled as "hot" Does that mean we have all have to start wearing Nightmare Before Christmas t-shirts and cheap mascara?

[Not a catchphrase, but a message to fellow catchphrase posters.]

I agree, Thedge. I agree, Ribs.

[Suggested by my six-year-old daughter: Super Pooper Looper Snooper]

You have no idea. She's the only six year old I know who dreams of becoming a stand-up.

[Suggested by my six-year-old daughter: Super Pooper Looper Snooper]

Suggested by my six-year-old daughter: Super Pooper Looper Snooper

[Double-Bacon Ranch Asiago Supreme Deluxe with 100% real beef. That's what the ladies call it anyway.]

Double-Bacon Ranch Asiago Supreme Deluxe with 100% real beef. That's what the ladies call it anyway.

[Our foe has been vanquished! Let us feast on his cookies-and-cream flesh!]

Our foe has been vanquished! Let us feast on his cookies-and-cream flesh!

[Batman would do better with the ladies if his post-coital ritual wasn't to drop to their knees and cry "Mommy I miss you!"]

Batman would do better with the ladies if his post-coital ritual wasn't to drop to their knees and cry "Mommy I miss you!"

[If dinosaurs are so cool, why don't you ever see them driving fancy cars to fancy bars?]

Yep. That's basically it. Happy catchphrasing!

[I don't care if it's a so-called young adult novel, I love reading the Bible.]

I don't care if it's a so-called young adult novel, I love reading the Bible.

[Not a catchphrase, but a message to fellow catchphrase posters.]

You're right Pwnix, some of these points do seem obvious, and yet what is obvious to some seems oblivious to others.

[Not a catchphrase, but a message to fellow catchphrase posters.]

Hello fellow catchphrasers,

 

2014 was a good year for me catchphrase-wise. I only started posting catchphrases in June and in that time Mr Aukerman chose my catchphrases for six episodes. Is this because I'm a catchphrase genius? Hardly. Its because I noted a number of unspoken guild lines Mr Aukerman seems to use when selecting his catchphrases. I share these guild lines with you to help us all develop better catchphrases and give us all a better chance at having them picked.

 

1 - Vulgarity doesn't work. While Mr Aukerman may sometimes pick a catchphrase that is sexual in nature, he only does when it is light-hearted. He also tends to avoid cursing.

 

2 - Never use the words "Comedy Bang Bang" or any variation thereof. He already has his intro down. He says the catchphrase and then says "Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang." He never breaks this pattern and will never choose a catchphrase the asks him to do so.

 

3 - Don't make references to the show or its guests. The universe of the show belongs to Mr Aukerman and his guests, the catchphrase is always independent of it.

 

4 - Don't reference current events or trends.

 

5 - Don't make it too long. While longer catchphrases are picked occasionally, in general, if you can't fit it withing the subject line of the topic, its too long.

 

The most basic rule is this: make it fun, not funny. Don't make it a pun, don't make a joke, just make it fun for Mr Aukerman to say with enthusiasm. That doesn't mean it can't be a pun or joke, but that is not a requirement and needn't be your goal. After all, what was so funny about "What's up, Hotdog?"

 

Anyway, feel free to take my advice or not. Its done well for me, but to each his own.

 

Happy catchphrasing!

[Four time champion, five time chump, but six times a week the old boy takes a dump.]

Four time champion, five time chump, but six times a week the old boy takes a dump.

[Easy come, easy go. Easy come back, you forgot your mittens!]

Easy come, easy go. Easy come back, you forgot your mittens!

[If dinosaurs are so cool, why don't you ever see them driving fancy cars to fancy bars?]

If dinosaurs are so cool, why don't you ever see them driving fancy cars to fancy bars?

[You're just too good to be true, therefore I can't trust anything I consider to be a reality.]

You're just too good to be true, therefore I can't trust anything I consider to be a reality.

[Getting scratched by a cat resulting in an infection and temperature of 104 is not as fun as the song suggests.]

Getting scratched by a cat resulting in an infection and temperature of 104 is not as fun as the song suggests.

[Time was you couldn't even buy a pickle without saddling up the old horse. Now-a-days people just eat the horse!]

Time was you couldn't even buy a pickle without saddling up the old horse. Now-a-days people just eat the horse!

[I said nothing about buttermilk! Buckwheat 'til I die!]

In blocky old English letters across your shoulders.

[I said nothing about buttermilk! Buckwheat 'til I die!]

This one is for you, you foolish rebel.