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Posts posted by jaymanthegreat
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You can bring the energy to the show, but you can't surge-protect it.
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You could call me Mary, but that was my friend Kipp's mother's name. So don't.
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You may be six degrees from Kevin Bacon, but we're all just one degree from the icy grip of death.
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Boil some water off, add some flavor, strain it in muslin; its all Greek yogurt to me.
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I always thought an eclair was just an electronic version of my ex-girlfriend.
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For bathroom time, don't forget the TP --now with a rush of cherry flavor!
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If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree --the tree wins.
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Shave the head but never the face
and you'll look sharp all over the place!
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Time is on my side and together we'll take on space. To the stars!
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Love is tender and I've got a big-ass appetite.
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Love will only die when the Easy Cheez runs out.
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I like my sparkles, don't get me wrong. But keep your goddamn glitter away from me!
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I got separate bins for my paper, plastic, aluminum, but not my heart. Guess I'll have to throw it away.
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When all's said and done, you'll never eat a hamburger like my buddy Ted.
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Eat it, Sit on it, just don't smear it on your face.
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CAUTION: Not to be used on heating appliances. Suitable for use at no more than 93 degrees C (200 F)
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Just saw 12 Angry Men. Quite mild for a gay porn.
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Superglued your butt together? Try some Kryptosolvent.
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German chocolate, Swedish Fish, Dutch cannabis... dems be my sex moves.
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When everyone else stands to dance, be sure you're already on the floor flopping like a rainbow trout.
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I drove my Ford to the levee. It just wasn't the same.
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Today, yesterday, next Tuesday afternoon. These are all days.
Two heads may be better than one, but my ex preferred taking three at a time.
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Two heads may be better than one, but my ex preferred taking three at a time.