"Gimme that peel! Gotta have that peel!" said the modest banana.

["Gimme that peel! Gotta have that peel!" said the modest banana.]

"Gimme that peel! Gotta have that peel!" said the modest banana.

[All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies.]

All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies. All the single ladies? All the single ladies.

[David Lee Broth loves some hot chicken noodle before belting out the high notes]

David Lee Broth loves some hot chicken noodle before belting out the high notes

[Daddy Bong-Legs: The Ultimate Party Spider]

Daddy Bong-Legs: The Ultimate Party Spider

[Mothra-stafari rollin' up a fattie blunt to smoke wit' Godzilla Mon]

Eye and eye

protect yo neck

[Sticks and stones may break my bones, no wait, they most definitely do, you can stop now, hypothesis proved.]

Sticks and stones may break my bones, no wait, they most definitely do, you can stop now, hypothesis proved.

[Step on a crack, break your momma's back. Smoke some crack, break your momma's heart.]

Step on a crack, break your momma's back. Smoke some crack, break your momma's heart.

[Peeps-ing Tom loves to watch you eat Easter candy in the nude]

Peeps-ing Tom loves to watch you eat Easter candy in the nude

[Peep floop flangity shingy takka takk brappa nappa blammy blam]

Peep floop flangity shingy takka takk brappa nappa blammy blam

[How did THIS get made? I mean think about it, what are we even DOING here. Last show everyone. Move on with your lives.]

How did THIS get made? I mean think about it, what are we even DOING here. Last show everyone. Move on with your lives.

[If you spent one percent of the military budget on education you'd have a lot of Rolls-Royces in the staff parking lot]

If you spent one percent of the military budget on education you'd have a lot of Rolls-Royces in the staff parking lot.

[The new collaboration between Kanye West and his psychologist brings new meaning to the term "shrink wrap"]

The new collaboration between Kanye West and his psychologist brings new meaning to the term "shrink wrap"

[Yo momma so stupid she submits catch-and-release-phrases]

***

[Bing bong, Google hookah]

420 brah

[Every man is looking for a lady in the parlor & a whore in the bedroom and a plumber in the bathroom & a carpenter on the roof because hey, free labor]

Every man is looking for a lady in the parlor and a whore in the bedroom and a plumber in the bathroom and a carpenter on the roof because hey, free labor.

[No no, you misunderstood. Soylent Green is peephole, you can totally see some boobies through it]

No no, you misunderstood. Soylent Green is peephole, you can totally see some boobies through it

[I think it'd be awesome to work in a lab because hey, free rat meat!]

I think it'd be awesome to work in a lab because hey, free rat meat!

[I left my heart in San Francisco. Unfortunate for the patient, for the transplant was time-sensitive & now his chances of survival are slim to none]

I left my heart in San Francisco. Unfortunate for the patient, for the transplant was time-sensitive & now his chances of survival are slim to none

[I just flew into America, and boy are my arms Christian!]

Drumpf

[Been searching all my life for a girl that can move her tongue into a figure-8 because you know, sex stuff, but also she's a witch that should be...]

Been searching all my life for a girl that can move her tongue into a figure-8 because you know, sex stuff, but also she's a witch that should be cast into the Lord's cleansing fires

[My spirit animal is a Phoenix primarily because of the beauty of its feathers but there's also that arson thing I can't quite seem to shake]

My spirit animal is a Phoenix primarily because of the beauty of its feathers but there's also that arson thing I can't quite seem to shake

[Looking for one extra ticket to Superego SF Sketchfest (Saturday, January 14, 2017)]

Anyone have an extra? Contact me at monterhey AT gmail DOT com

 

thanks!

[Fred Flinstoner smokes Yabba-Dabba Dabs]

Fred Flinstoner smokes Yabba-Dabba Dabs

[If you build it, they will come. If you killed it, I will cum (I'm a necrophiliac).]

If you build it, they will come. If you killed it, I will cum (I'm a necrophiliac).

[During the next ice age I would hate to be one of those people who freak out over flag burning because they're going to have to make a choice (cont)]

During the next ice age I would hate to be one of those people who freak out over flag burning because they're going to have to make a choice: patriotism or survival?