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Content count
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Posts posted by Pure Guava
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Oh man, she really opened up a can of worms last night which was fortunate because I'm a talking catfish and hadn't eaten since breakfast.
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The FBI set up a fake app to capture people that distributed tree porn. Operation "Sap Fap App Trap" was a complete success.
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9 out of 10 time-travelers agree: You think shit is fucked up right now? Ohhhhh man....just you wait.
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Out of the seventeen British bands that dress up like aliens, Fleetwood Mac and Me is by far the most talented.
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Comedy Bang-Bang your head! Metal heath'll drive you mad
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Like sands through the hourglass, you are also an obsolete relic of times long gone. Clean out your desk, Jerry, the Robo-Timer 3000 keeps time twice as fast with half the sand and none of your distracting child-custody drama bullshit.
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Dumb. Sorry.
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A spit in my hand is worth lube in the bush
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The Millennial Falcon and Gen-X Wing Fighter...is that a thing?
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Trick-or-treat, drop that beat, something something Skrillex
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"I cannot believe in a God who wants to be praised all the time but one who wants spanked? Gimme dat Bible, motherfuckers" ---Nietzsche
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All that jumping is futile, Q-Bert. The colors may change but you'll never ever get off this platform.
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"Doing it doggy style" is an insult to all the missionary style loving canines of the world
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This phatch crase brought to you by Matt Gourley
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I wish Fort Knox was a pillow fort because stealing all that gold would make you really sleepy.
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Going to need a place to rest your weary thieving head.
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I wouldn't touch her with a ten-foot pole. First of all, it's very rude to poke people with poles, secondly she's farther away than you think, anything under a 20-footer would be a waste of good pole.
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Don't drink that milk, it's spoiled. Mommy and Daddy buy that milk anything it asks for. Yuck.
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I don't have a catchphrase to add, I just want to someone to slut shame me, it's kind of my thing. Anyone? Hello?
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There's no "u" in team because you are terrible at sports and nobody likes you.There is a "u" in fuck off so maybe go look into that instead
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Eskimos have 500 words for "snow" but only one for "ice" because hey, there's only so much room in the dictionary.
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"You really put the "chalk" in chocolate" would be a sick burn if you were a judge in a cooking competition.
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Love your username. You are Guided by Awesomeness.
Cock a doodle do as I say, not as I dooby-dooby-do
in New Catchphrase Suggestions
Posted
Cock a doodle do as I say, not as I dooby-dooby-do