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Pure Guava

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Topics posted by Pure Guava

  1.  

    Bacon bookmarks will turn your pages greasy and attract stray animals but hey, you only live once you fat piece of shit

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 368 views
  2.  

    A hologram never loses it's edge, you just gotta look harder, old man.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 353 views
  3.  

    A rainbow is just a weird long cloud to the color blind

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 311 views
  4.  

    The only onion worth an ion is the one I won only yesterday

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 294 views
  5.  

    As I lay upon my deathbed, I stare unto the face of God and ask him 1 question: Why didn't more people call their poops "Cocoa pebbles" ??

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 315 views
  6.  

    I spit hot fire on all the suckas, for I am Hephaestus, God of Fire and thou hast angered thee

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 333 views
  7.  

    I never used to curse the bags under my eyes until the airlines started charging so much for a second carry-on

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 281 views
  8.  

    Forget everything you think you know and you'll be on a one-way ticket to Amnesia-ville, baby!

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 303 views
  9.  

    if you play Pac-Man backwards you have a lot of ghosts avoiding a pellet-spewing madman

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 1 reply
    • 393 views
  10.  

    Gary Glitter? Human litter. Hashtag scumbag when mentioning him on Twitter

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 386 views
  11.  

    Placenta porridge? Packed with potassium & protein for power to play Pac-Man with your peeps. Peace!

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 347 views
  12.  

    Closed captioning of this catchphrase is brought to you in part by (unintelligible grunts and moans)

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 344 views
  13.  

    For those of you who are only fans of catchphrases you can stop listening in 3...2....1.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 316 views
  14.  

    Sally sells seashells because Sally has average merchandise. Come to Pete's A-shells, we guarantee the highest quality shells in the Tri-State area

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 331 views
  15.  

    Anyone can turn a horse into glue, it's turning the glue back into a horse that is the hard part.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 342 views
  16.  

    Next on an all-new Celebrity Swamp Games: Playing Boggle in a bog with Wade Boggs.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 321 views
  17.  

    Fuck the police. Maybe the sexual release and resulting endorphin rush will calm their itchy trigger fingers

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 333 views
  18.  

    Duck, duck, goose, stick it in my caboose. Goose, goose, duck, these birds know how to fly south for the winter

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 380 views
  19.  

    There's a crispness in the air, the leaves are bursting with colors...grab your dogs & horses, it's time for the annual Beastiality-Con to begin!

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 311 views
  20.  

    There's no "i" in team but if you add "u" to firehose you have a shitty 80's band that can't put out a single fire.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 319 views
  21.  

    I'll give you one guess what a lumberjack-off does to a tree once he cuts it down.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 295 views
  22.  

    I've ordered 1,700 pot pies and have yet to find even a glimpse of a pot, not even a pan! These teeth aren't going to shatter themselves.

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 293 views
  23.  

    Flexible bros can touch their toes but will not rest until they get self-blown

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 313 views
  24.  

    The House of pies diagnoses obscure ingredients while flouting bakery rules

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 333 views
  25.  

    Who cut the cheese? Thou must repent for thy cheese cutting ways or be sent straight to eternal damnation with the meat slappers and cracker snappers

    By Pure Guava, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 339 views
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