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Days Won
1
Posts posted by Pure Guava
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All the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't hide the beastiality from the King and were beheaded post-haste.
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The jizz wizard shoots a white blizzard out of his magical staff. Gross.
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This land is your land, this land is my land. Our parents died without a will so we are going to have to let the lawyers figure this mess out. I'll see you in court.
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As the leaves change and fall to the ground I'm reminded of the cycle of life, the imminence of death, and how good it feels to fuck a warmed up pumpkin pie
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Daddy? They're reading my catchphrase right now, Daddy, are you proud of me? Did I do a good job Daddy?....Daddy?
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"I took it upon myself to put this book upon myself" said the polite librarian that was bad at rapping and didn't believe in carts
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The only hashtag I'm interested in is the tag that tells me the price of this hash I'm about to buy. #stoner
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They say all that glitters is gold but I just bought some silver glitter so what's the deal, they?
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Ask not what your country can do for you, for countries are not sentient beings and will never respond
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9 out of 10 stupid assholes agree: The didgeridoo is awesome
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On Australian HBO, "The Night Of" is known by it's alternative title: "The Next Afternoon"
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Move over, there's a new sheriff in town. You are standing right in his way. Just a few more inches oughta do it. OK I think that's good, he can get by you now.
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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, this bartering system isn't that creative or useful
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is it ok to reply in this thread without a Star Wars avatar?
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Hopefully this frees up Scott to fulfill his lifelong dream of joining the competitive eating circuit. Watch out Chestnut, Scott "3-Stomachs" Aukerman is coming for your title!
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The last time I saw so many stools on a stage was at the "Linda, the Incontinent Stripper" show in Vegas
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Kangaroo down under boomerang. Beerstrailian for Fosters
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The cow jumped over the moon. NOW do you see the problem with using so many hormones in beef?
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Takes a special kind of lady to never eat, pray, or love.
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Coca-Koala is the best-selling marsupial flavored soda on the market, narrowly beating out Mountain Roo
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Yahoo is just a stage name, his birth certificate actually says "Netscape Gregory Serious"
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"Pour Some Sugar On Me" was Def Leppard's 3rd greatest song about using ants as a torture method
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Kidnapped, tied up for 18 months, no contact with the outside world. Severe beatings daily. The struggle is real.
in New Catchphrase Suggestions
Posted
Kidnapped, tied up for 18 months straight, no contact with the outside world. Severe beatings daily. The struggle is real.