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Yeah I just saw this movie for the first time and need it to be covered.

(I have forgotten how to speak with actual words, y'all.)

This ain't over yet

I've been ready for this my entire life

This was me as well. I kept thinking, "Please don't read that whole thing! I was a ranting mess by the end!" But he enjoyed it and I enjoyed that lol.

If they do this they need to get Chris Hardwick back on to discuss his role as Peter Hardwick.

Oh I'm comin' for ya

Wait... Y'all... They have to do this movie now because it centers around ooze!

I am the June here in this situation and I only saw the first movie once when I was a child and have very limited memory of it, and the cartoon wasn't high up on my viewing list like X-Men or Power Rangers were. So I'm purely basing my knowledge off of what this movie showed me. And this movie did not show Leo being a memorable character and showed Raph taking charge (albeit in more of a "screw you guys I'm goin over here" kinda way).

Apparently they released a teaser trailer for the sequel before they even signed on a director. I'm not sure if they have even gotten someone yet to take over but I'm pretty sure that the sequel is still set for a 2017 release with the third coming out in 2018. But we'll see if that really happens because it is not uncommon for people to realize their mistakes and abandon a franchise. I refuse to pay for this movie so if they do it I hope it's either on Netflix or easily torrented because this is a piece of trash.

Boom. We've figured out the secret. Maybe this is why they were so awful at hiding away from Keno when he came to April's apartment because Mikey told them all of his secret attraction and was like hey wait let's all be discovered really easily because this dude is super cute. But it's got me thinking about all of the other turtles personalities and what was shown on screen versus what their historical counterparts were known as. Raph seems to be super moody and likes to do things his way and separated himself from the group unnecessarily in this movie. Historical-Raphael was known as living somewhat of a nomadic lifestyle living all over Italy and was the most teacher-like artist of his time (he had the most pupils in his workshop). It seems that there is a possibility that the creators took these facts about the artist and applied them to the turtle. But in this movie they make him seem more like an asshole who can't work with others rather than just a nomadic leader. I'm guessing he is supposed to be the leader, yes? Leo is the most forgettable in this movie. Or I just completely mixed his character with Donnie. I genuinely have no idea if he ever said anything. Funny considering I would say that Leonardo da Vinci is the most famous out of all these artists. He was a fuckin' genius! If anything Turtle-Leo should have been the one who goes through all of the science and technology like he knows everything about it. Unless he was and I'm confusing him with Donnie....... In that case carry on.... Donnie was the one I thought did all of the "smart" stuff in this movie. Smart being in quotations because I'm sure just being smarter than Mikey isn't that hard to overcome. And we already know that Artist-Donatello is a lame choice in reality. I'm thinking he was just picked for name rather than anything else. Because Raphael, Michelangelo, and Leonardo are considered the holy trinity of Renaissance artists, but we have a fourth turtle who gets shafted and left with Donatello. Even I had to look up more information about the man because I only really remember studying his sculptures and nothing about his actual life. I find it funny that he is the only one who really only worked with sculpture and never really painted. Further separating him from the group. Seriously should have just named him Caravaggio. At least that man's work is memorable! Also just to point out that Artist-Michelangelo hated both Raphael and Leonardo so there's that. Art history is fun y'all.

That dandelion part irked me so much that every time I wrote it out here it was just a bunch of keyboard smashes. Who doesn't know what a dandelion looks like!?

I almost created a new thread for this because I typed in the full title and nothing came up. Thank goodness I did another search and found this. My coworker listens to the podcast but doesn't comment on the forums and came up to me and said, "How do I go about submitting the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers movie?!" Needless to say it's been two years since this has been talked about and it still needs to happen. My childhood demands it.

I completely have an image of Raphael walking through Italy just flipping people off and yelling, "YO I'M WALKIN' HERE!"

Let's really think about it. Mikey is supposed to be the real horn dog with women, right? Or at least that's the way the kind of portray him in this movie. He flirts with April a lot and it's clear he wants to get up all on that. Michelangelo the artist, however, was definitely the opposite. There are still rumors (and let's be honest it's probably all true) that Michelangelo was gay which explains why his knowledge of the female body was sub par at best. But within those rumors are Michelangelo being rather sexual. So maybe Mikey is still supposed to embody the artist but of course they wouldn't want to have him show attraction towards men. But what if they thought that Mikey was supposed to be the antithesis of Michelangelo? What if all the turtles are supposed to act in ways their counterparts don't?

Because y'all released an art history nerd monster let's also point out how despite Michelangelo's brilliance in sculpture and painting he had no idea what a woman's body looked like If I were friends with Ninja Turtle Mikey I probably would call him Apple Boobs instead.

I remember sitting in my Art History courses going through Donatello and kept thinking this is the asshole they named a Ninja Turtle after??? I mean we could have named him Bernini or Caravaggio or Titian or literally any of the shit tons of old artist dudes. Also even though I do think Donatello's David is kind of boring I do have to say it is probably the most accurate age wise of all the Davids made during the time. Seriously why did so many artists make Davids? and this piece is rather spectacular

I had no idea that asshole kid's name was Keno until now. I thought they were saying Kito the whole time and honestly I don't really care what it was because he was the worst and I hate him.

I accept your nerdom! Love how I got all Zouks on y'all and it really stuck. Keep it up, nerds!

I thought they were gonna do some type of pool game stunt but apparently that was too much logic for that stupid movie. Also on the subject of Michelangelo, is he always regarded as the stupid one? I don't remember him being made fun of by his other brothers that much in the first movie... And I felt stupid watching it if I didn't exactly know what the fuck the professor was saying and then Leo had to explain to Mikey what was going on immediately after.

Alright nerds. Get ready. First of all y'all lied to me that was the longest experience of my life. The lamest, longest hour and 25 minutes ever. And I knew I was gonna be in for a real treat when the whole movie starts off with some classic misogyny! I'm very pleased that they all caught on to the absolute douchey-ness that was that asshole. I hated him. But for real corrections and omissions time this is what I've got. Does Donnie use a pool stick as his weapon? He just has this stick that he is like chalking the end every time he is about to get into a fight. I think he did it maybe three times? I mean we already all know that he doesn't even use it but why does he even bother chalking the end? It's not a pool game! Shredder just let them stand there while they gave Tokka and Rahzar donuts?! Him and his whole gang just stand there the whole time! KILL THEM THEY ARE RIGHT THERE AND ALL OF YOUR NINJAS ARE JUST WATCHING A DONUT EXCHANGE! So are we to believe that this "final battle" was the break dance fight? Because they never actually touch Shredder once and they even try to fucking talk to him. Their nemesis has just suddenly evolved into a super Shredder and they want to fucking talk to him. Y'all this movie makes me so mad. And then instead of just going ahead and fighting him they are like, "Wait we're turtles!" and go into the fucking water. Which when they come back up they are coughing and act like they actually can't breathe underwater. So which is it?! Can they go into water or not!? I had no idea that was supposed to be a wolf monster until it changed back. Idk if I genuinely missed some part where they mentioned that he was a wolf but that monster looked more like an orangutan I swear. At least the snapping turtle still resembled a snapping turtle. This movie was so lame. So lame. The lamest.

Although Cameron, I can totally see why this would be so much better in your memory.

Well um... I do have, "Go ninja go ninja go" stuck in my head. And I hate all of you.

Oh yeah I completely agree. JA would not have been even half as good as it was if they had been winking at the audience the whole time. If you have seen Sense8 at all (which is AMAZING btw I highly recommend it if you haven't) then you can tell The Wachowskis do not do subtle ever. And half the time I can't tell if that means they are aware of the ridiculousness they put into their work or if they genuinely think everyone is going to take it seriously. I may only have B&R and Spice World to really back up that statement I made because I can think of two other movies that are terrible (The Day After Tomorrow & Queen of the Damned) that actually try to be serious within the ridiculousness and I don't think I would love those movies as much as I do if they weren't so.