Elektra Boogaloo

Right? Jem never saved the President from an exploding bomb while driving a racecar in China. It was not at all true to canon.

Someone sat in on my group therapy recently and I thought of you guys. But she worked for the hospital. She wasn't a random person from another city.

I threw up in my mouth a little. For me, Tyrese is the hottest. But the Rock is a Hufflepuff so you know he'd make sure you'd get off too.

I heard a completely unverified Twitter rumor that Han was coming back in 9. So maybe they know he's alive? But then what was the POINT of the last movie... You're right, it doesn't make sense.

The Hitman's Bodyguard trailer is so perfect, they don't even need to make the actual movie. It's all right there. As for the debate about the Marvel movies, you must admit that--given the above evidence--that the lack of Samuel L. Jackson lately is a big problem. Age of Ultron would've been 100x better if he told the robot to go fuck himself.

I'm upset about Elena (Elsa Pataky). I hate when they kill the lady to make a dude sad. Especially after she's basically the Offred to Letty's Serena Joy. (Handmaid's Tale Reference! Look it up!) I really hope the next movie is Chris Hemsworth breaking the fourth wall (with his hammer?) to avenge his wife.

I wish June had been there. I would've loved to listen to her try to make sense of it. Glad to know God is a dog and a woman. I still didn't watch this movie. I thought I would this week but then I thought I'd just watch John Wick instead. I think I win.

All I remember about "My Stepmother Is an Alien" is that Seth Green and Alyson Hannigan are in it and they were Willow and Oz on "Buffy." My knowledge of the world is limited to how things relate to "Buffy," I guess.

I laughed at lot at Paul's inability to pronounce Hari Kondabolu even though he had a pronunciation guide. That is real commitment to this name bit. (Politically Reactive is a fun show too.) This was the first time I've had a C&O read in awhile, I think. Kind of disappointed Paul pronounced my name right this time... I've never seen the LAKE HOUSE.

I WISH that had been in the movie. That would've made them so much more vulnerable to the cats. Like if they randomly wandered outside while asleep. Plus then you could have more instances of cats randomly jumping out of places which is a Hollywood trope I enjoy.

Damn it. This is dated 1884. So they couldn't have gone centuries without a name until the song came out. I'm bummed my theory is shot. I guess I'll have to go with a more realistic theory that Stephen King liked the song and wanted to use it in the movie and thus called them "Sleepwalkers" in his head, never realizing he didn't explain it at all. Because of cocaine.

Didn't she know Jason, Kimberly and Zack but not Trini? I think that was the joke. I wondered about the car too. Only explanation is that Angel Grove cops are terrible, which pretty much tracks with the series. It should've randomly been Bulk and Skull. Remember how they wanted to be like junior detectives in one season? That was really dumb.

Or does the son call the Sleepwalkers because that is "their song"? (I mean they say they don't know of any others of their kind, right? So this could be just a thing they made up.) So we're supposed to believe that for CENTURIES they had no name and then they heard thing song in the 50s and were like, "I got it!"

Admittedly I didn't watch this movie, but why are they called "Sleepwalkers" (other than that is the name of the film and the name the son gave)? Obviously they walk and are bipedal... so that checks out. But do they do anything with sleep? I think it should be called Catwalkers.

The Egyptian gods are fake. My orc/elf analogy is real. Guys, Cameron H. is infringing on my first amendment rights.

BETTER MOVIE!

I was thinking about this last night. I think the Sleepwalkers being mother and son is clearly a point of faith and we shouldn't mock June for her beliefs. Like when I was in Catholic school I very clearly remember a religion teacher getting mad at us because we believed those cartoons where a person gets wings and a halo after they die. Because she said angels were never human. That angels and humans are not the same species. Angels were all created by god. And if demons are just fallen angels (and I confess here I may be confusing angels and demons for elves and orcs from Lord of the Rings but it's all a religion, right?) then they wouldn't have familial relationships as June is asserting. They would be just created or not created. It's a matter of faith and I respect June's right to freedom of religion, guys.

I feel weird being in this thread defending this movie? I did wonder how they got from the docks to the mountain with no one commenting. I assume they had to weekend at Bernies it, which would be a hilarious end credit scene.

Maybe they thought they had to set up why this was a different Spider-man? Like, "Listen, they really need to know this isn't about Uncle Ben again."

Paul, I have fallen down an internet rabbit hole and discovered David Yost was the location manager for BURNING LOVE and NTS:SD:SUV. Does that mean you know the Blue Ranger? This is very important to 10-year-old me.

Confession: I cried. Like it's not a perfect movie or anything. I kind of hate the kid who plays Jason, which is a real problem since he's supposed to be the main character. (He kind of looks like Iceman from X-Men if he had a receding hairline?) But, like, it's watchable. I also really loved the series as a kid so I might be biased?

Why don't they just search Craigslist for "no pets" buildings near schools?

I love June's refusal to believe they are mother and son. I wonder if she is thinking, like how with vampires, they often have a maker who isn't their literal mother but is sometimes called mom. (Or in those annoying vampire books, sire and childe with an e, for extra e). I feel like relying on cats to fight shapeshifting creatures is going to be tough. They are going to decide you haven't given them enough attention and let your lifeforce get sucked out, then pee on your clothes.

I hope all of Earwolf's show use Vincent D'Onofrio reading the Earwolf store ad.