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Hello dear friends, I only recently started listening to the greatest podcast in the universe - Hollywood Handbook, of course (sorry, Matt Besser). The path was certainly a windy one: Comedy Bang! Bang! on Netflix led to CBB the podcast which led to countless others, including With Special Guest Lauren Lapkus. Which is where I first stumbled upon Hayes and Sean, and I instantly listened avidly. Although I thank a new star in the sky each night for the existence of Hollywood Handbook, there is one drawback. All of the other podcasts, which I once held in such high esteem, seem... amateurish in comparison to Hollywood Handbook. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm glad I'm not so naive anymore... but I shudder to think how threatening Hayes and Sean must be to the rest of Earwolf. Think about it: is there any way that Hollywood Handbook isn't the most listened to podcast on Earwolf? Foul play, that's one way. And I know just who and howdunnit. Scott Anchorman. Anchorman is big boss boy at Earwolf, but he's also a podcast host. Thus, the classic "Anchorman's Dilemma". Scott could throw Sean and Hayes off the air before everyone forgets Comedy Bang! Bang! Artist Scott would love that just too much. But businessboss Scott is too damn smart for that. Sean and Hayes are his ultimate cash cows. Anchorman has the engineers smudge the numbers to keep up appearances and keep Woolfcool from acquiring Earwolf. Speak on that.
So, what are the collectors doing? Should I bother to have a theory about this? Probably not, but here we go. So, remember when the scavenger said that everything in the ocean seems to drift away from everything else? The only way that makes sense is if the planet is expanding. (It's like blowing up a balloon with dots drawn on it. All the dots get farther away from each other.) Put this together with the map with the slowly growing sphere, the break symbol, and the symbol for the elemental water plane, and bingo bango, whisky tango -- the collectors are flooding these planets with water from the elemental plane through the break, which is some kind of dimensional portal. Maybe they're going to drain the planets once they've drowned everybody, or maybe they're just huge fans of Waterworld, which would be worse. Any other theories?