This Dead Air Brought to You By...

[Uncle Monty 6]

I was hoping this thread would be an encyclopaedic breakdown of all of Blaine's adverts

[For Glenishmore 0]

FOR GLENISHMORE!

[StevoDoccerson 97]

CRACKLE! Crackle! For when you want to marathon Godzilla movies while you sleep your Saturday away! CRACKLE! "Hey, wake up, it's Mothra!"

[DubipR 485]

Liquid Paper! How many times has someone said to you...'Hey, Mike Nesmith of the Monkee's mom created Liquid Paper!' Simply kick them in the balls and walk away smiling. LIQUID PAPER!

 

Now in Spellcheck!

[StevoDoccerson 97]

FACEBOOK! Check out Facebook! It's tumblr for moms! FACEBOOK! "The picture said 'Share if you love your country! Why didn't you 'share' it? Grandma's really upset and wanted me to talk to you!"

FACEBOOK!

[schadenfreudian 27]

Asparagus! When you absolutely, positively need your pee to smell like farts.

[boxofgeese 18]

I was hoping this thread would be an encyclopaedic breakdown of all of Blaine's adverts

 

 

Yeah, me too... Has anyone been cataloguing all of them? I started writing them down, but that was well into the middle of the episodes.

[StevoDoccerson 97]

The brand new JOKE-CATALOGER 9000! The Joke-Cataloger 9000, vastly superior to the old model, now has an instant meme generator! The Joke-Cataloger 9000! Because nothing's funnier than writing a joke down that somebody else said and breaking it down into why it's funny! The Joke-Cataloger 9000! From KILLFUN! The makers of PIE-GLUE (glue your pie down so they won't be thrown!) & WAFFLE IRONER (iron your waffle into a pancake with WAFFLE IRONER)!

THE JOKE-CATALOGER 9000! (available only in Utah)

[boxofgeese 18]

fog horn

[DubipR 485]

Paula Deen Catering

 

Enjoy the bounty of Southern Hospitality and tastes a' plenty with the mild touch of good ol' fashion bigotry.

From fried chicken to etouffee, enjoy the culinary delights of Mrs. Deen and her caterers as they serve you in true Southern eating.

 

"Mmmmm, that's N-word-riffic," according to Paula!

[stickfigurehero 9]

Children's chewable morphine.

 

Bedtime is now anytime!

 

From the makers Uncle Jack Daniels cough syrup.

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Pen and paper! Work! Play! Talk to your friends! It's the original computer! Pen and paper!

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Obscure emoticons! Because nuance and emotion are not hard enough in chatrooms. Obscure emoticons.

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Oldies stations! It's been 30 years since the 1980's. Oldies stations!

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Boomerangs! When your dog is too lazy to fetch. Boomerangs!

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Sphinx! (Sphinx!) Unholy union of man and lion. Sphinx. From the makers of Minotaur and Basselope!

 

(Shout out to "The Venture Brothers" and Berke Breathed's "Bloom County")

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Spartans! Heroes of Thermopyle, despoilers of boys. Spartans!

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Eyes! Looking, blinking, crying, Eyes! From the makers of Ears.

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

Broad swords! You got your hacking in my slashing! You got your slashing in my hacking! Broad swords!

 

If I don't stop now I never will. Good night, Glenishmoore!

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

(Okay, one more)

Obnoxious signatures! Yeah, yeah you're the funniest/smartest/alpha nerd. Overcompensating on Internet forums since the ASCII days of 1994! Obnoxious signatures. I gots one, and I knows it!

[StevoDoccerson 97]

TUMBLR! Tumblr! For when you want to look at pictures of Benedict Cumberbatch and read grad students opinions about gender roles! TUMBLR! We've got hashtags too! TUMBLR! GIFs from movies you've seen hundreds of times! TUMBLR! It's like facebook without your mom! TUMBLR! (from the makers of LiveJournal)

[ThePinkPhantom 20]

MySpace! Isn't it cute, grandpa still thinks he's cool! MySpace! Because Zuckerburg would never be your first friend. MySpace! Love us, please! We're still cooler than Friendster! MySpace!

 

(cue the jingle)

 

Do you really think Facebook is your place?

Then you haven't tried the new MySpace!

 

-From the makers of Compuserve

[IDisrobe 7]

I was hoping this thread would be an encyclopaedic breakdown of all of Blaine's adverts

If there are any you remember - type them in and credit Blaine Capatch. I am going to update the Wika page for an episode guide and as part of that - I'll pull them and add them here. It will take some time to re-listen to the old episodes to pull them out so, in the mean time, come up with some new ones. It's fun!

[IDisrobe 7]

Pillow cases! Covers pillows AND your face at Klan rallies. Hobo's bag-of-holding since 1929. Soft, Smooth and racist. Pillow cases.

[IDisrobe 7]

A few of these are really good. Most are just so-so. And others - like my Pillow case one above - must thrill Blaine as he realizes his job is very, very safe.