Blair Witch 2, Surrogates

[DeathToMikeyBay 130]

Blair Witch 2

 

Take a groundbreaking indie horror movie, then replace everything with generic hollywood mush. NOTHING in this movie makes any sense.

 

SPOILERS

 

The highlight is the most laughable computer scene in movie history. They're trying to find missing video footage on their editing program. Some girl mutters "backwards", so they try to play the tapes backwards. Nothing. Then someone says, "Type in the command backwards!". This magically allows them to see ghosts on the missing footage! Not only was the magic command hilarious, but so was the idea that a video player was using typed commands like it was an 80s BASIC system.

 

 

 

Surrogates

 

The "thought provoking" Bruce Willis science fiction movie that subtely asks the question if technology makes us shut ins. Why yes, in the future people stay at home so they can pilot remote controlled robots to nightclubs so they can have sex with other people's remote controlled robots. The whole story feels like it should have been the plot to a bad Jean Claude Van Damm movie like Time Cop.

 

 

 

GOOD insane movies

 

Fifth Element, Big Trouble in Little China

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

I think you meant a GREAT Jean-Claude Van Damme movie like Time Cop.

[Lukas Holmes 2287]

Yikes. Blair Witch 2. I had forgotten that abortion of a film.

 

I liked the graphic novel Surrogates was based on. Went a lot further with the ideas.

[DeathToMikeyBay 130]

I forgot the best part about Surrogates: the fact that Bruce Willis' young, idealized robot body is just regular old Bruce Willis with a horrendous makeup job and frightening toupee. I'd say it even tops Al Pacino's wig in 88 Minutes.

[DeathToMikeyBay 130]

Oooo! And the next best part of Blair Witch 2: the continuity breaking nudity.

 

It's like they wanted nudity, but balked at the idea of full frontal. So you have these scenes where people are totally naked from behind, but in shots where they turn around they suddenly have underwear on. Then it's right back to being totally naked once they turn their backs again.

 

Definitely a WTF moment.

[wyldride 285]

Surrogates goes completely off the rails (such as they are) when the (so-called) protagonist suddenly decides "Screw all these people who are perfectly happy living their lives the way they are: The terrorist has it right! From now on, you're living your life in the way I find acceptable." Yeah, uh, good call Bruce.