Robot Jox (1989)

[shamblingcat 6]

 

 

In the future, all wars are replaced by awesome robot fights. Now, as the fate of Alaska hangs in the balance, everything rests on America's hero, Achilles, as he faces off against the undefeated Russian champ, Alexander. This is pure gold guys.

 

 

Don't even get me started on the ridiculous caricatures of cultural stereotypes, the flying car controlled by an alarm-clock/radio, the aggro crag test chamber, or the gratuitous silent space sequence. The main character could even be Paul's clone brother! Just look at the eye spacing!

 

 

 

Basically this is a perfect movie for HDTGM because it's laughably bad while trying so hard to be good. I'll just finish by leaving you with this.

 

 

TWO THUMBS UP!!

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

If I remember correctly (and I probably don't, seeing as how I saw this once or twice about 20 years ago...), wasn't this like "Rocky IV" with guys in giant robots?

[Lando 2019]

Hey it's the guy from the Alien Nation TV show.

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

 

 

In the future, all wars are replaced by awesome robot fights. Now, as the fate of Alaska hangs in the balance, everything rests on America's hero, Achilles, as he faces off against the undefeated Russian champ, Alexander. This is pure gold guys.

 

 

Don't even get me started on the ridiculous caricatures of cultural stereotypes, the flying car controlled by an alarm-clock/radio, the aggro crag test chamber, or the gratuitous silent space sequence. The main character could even be Paul's clone brother! Just look at the eye spacing!

 

 

 

Basically this is a perfect movie for HDTGM because it's laughably bad while trying so hard to be good. I'll just finish by leaving you with this.

 

 

TWO THUMBS UP!!

 

I can imagine the conversation that the director had with the costume designers: "Just wrap a bunch of shit in stereo cables! Power Gloves and RCA jacks are the way of the future! This is gonna be so fuckin' rad..."

[VampiresVampiresVampires 303]

Good one. There is also a movie called "Crash and Burn" which was an R-rated version of basically the same movie. It was released on VHS as "Robot Jox 2," even though it had nothing to do with the original.

[theskullofduggery 0]

I loved this movie as a kid. I watched it again about six months ago and it still holds up. This movie is the balls!

 

I have just one word for RobotJox:

ACHILLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ThatWorstMan 0]

Bumping as we had a movie night with this and it was incredible. People couldn't believe this movie had even been made, let alone in the late 80's. And fun fact: it bankrupted the studio!

 

Here is the most badass 80's trailer:

 

And the full movie, on Youtube as well:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=1265E8rfQ-k

 

Seriously, this is sooo quotable and amazing and insane.

 

Apparently the writer and director had a basic argument over the movie which plagued production. The director wanted to make a kids movie that adults could enjoy, while Joe Haldeman (of the Forever War(!) ) wanted to make a movie for adults that kids coudl enjoy.

 

Except...did either of them see how any of this could be kid friendly, with all the killings and whatnot? Ha!

 

Also: Giant Robot Chainsaw Dick.

 

 

ACHILLES!!!!!!!!!!!!

[NicCageFace 0]

My favorite character is Tex. Anyone want to guess his outfit?

[KevinMcUnicorn 0]

I had that poster on my wall as a kid even before I saw the movie!

[_kennet 0]

 

It is post-World War III. War is outlawed. In its place, are matches between large Robots piloted by elite Robot Jox. These matches take place between two large superpowers over disputed territories that in the post-apocalypse have seemingly no value.

 

Part oh-so-close-to-awesome sci-fi, part did-they-try-and-make-this-shit-with-$30, it was a childhood favorite of mine. I've recently re-watched it and absolutely nothing about it makes sense. Also, there's a healthy dose of good-old-fashioned Texas misogyny for seemingly zero reason.

[easttexas 3]

Great movie for the podcast. It's been a long time since I saw this but didn't this movie predict, before Starship Troopers, that in the future showers would co-ed?

 

Crash and Burn.

[JustinL 216]

Entire movie's on YouTube. I remember desperately wanting to see this and never being able to find it anywhere.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZXWHswqCQo

[JustinL 216]

Oops. Combine redundant threads?

[Shannon 2953]

Oops. Combine redundant threads?

 

Boom. Done.

[JasonDivock 0]

With the release of Pacific Rim, it's as good a time as any to do this . . . and the whole friggin thing is on youtube!

[PhillipMedoc 648]

Holy shit, those are just RCA cables, that's hilarious! Good thing they have an analog video feed to their gloves.

 

Incidentally, this is kind of a black sheep in the oeuvre of director Stuart Gordon. He's mostly known for weird, gross and scary Lovecraftian stuff like

and

-- both of which are amazing horror/comedy/sci-fi films with pretty terrific practical effects. It's really wonderful to watch these old movies and marvel at creations like this:

 

 

And now everything is CGI. Everything, even most sets. Watch some classic Universal/Hammer films, those sets they built are incredible. It's sad that practical effects are now, largely, a lost art.

 

I met Stuart Gordon once, had a drink with him after he showed one of his films at a small film fest. Incredibly nice, smart man; not what you would expect from a guy who made a movie where

.

 

Anyways, tangent/rant over. I fully endorse Robot Jox.

[klemjohansen 748]

A guy on SomethingAwful's once-great forums did a shot-by-shot breakdown of this movie with gifs and such. It was lovely. He also did a workup for Willow. Sadly I can't find it anymore.

[wakefresh 689]

Someone said earlier that this would be a good tie in with Pacific Rim coming out soon, I would also counter that it opens up a nice double feature of Atlantic Rim (the current rip off made by Thunder Levin) and Robot Jox. Very good material for a live show, if you ask me.

[JordanBush 0]

Haha, I was just talking about this movie to my friend earlier, and I can't remember what brought it up. I don't remember if I've ever even seen it, I think I just saw it in the video store all the time as a kid and really wanted to see it (other than the giant robots, what caught my eye the most was the word "Jox," which I assumed was a real word. I didn't know what it meant, I just thought it sounded cool).

 

But about a year ago I found it on DVD for like two dollars and bought it for the aforementioned friend because he had told me about how much he loved that movie as a kid. I knew what he was talking about at the time but neither of us could remember the title until I saw it again in a comic book store. I thought it was really crazy how I stumbled upon a movie so obscure when I wasn't even looking for it.

 

So yeah, I agree with this recommendation. It would be fun to hear you guys talk about it for sure.

[JordanBush 0]

Holy shit, those are just RCA cables, that's hilarious! Good thing they have an analog video feed to their gloves.

 

Incidentally, this is kind of a black sheep in the oeuvre of director Stuart Gordon. He's mostly known for weird, gross and scary Lovecraftian stuff like

and

-- both of which are amazing horror/comedy/sci-fi films with pretty terrific practical effects. It's really wonderful to watch these old movies and marvel at creations like this:

 

 

And now everything is CGI. Everything, even most sets. Watch some classic Universal/Hammer films, those sets they built are incredible. It's sad that practical effects are now, largely, a lost art.

 

I met Stuart Gordon once, had a drink with him after he showed one of his films at a small film fest. Incredibly nice, smart man; not what you would expect from a guy who made a movie where

.

 

Anyways, tangent/rant over. I fully endorse Robot Jox.

 

Ha, I had no idea this was a Stuart Gordon movie, interesting.

[comeau1337 21]

Trailer:

 

This movie is just the perfect blend of insane, quotable, and just plain bad.

 

IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102800/business?ref_=tt_dt_bus

 

 

Apparently, costed around $10,000,000 to make and pulled in just under 1.3 million in box office.

 

Full movie is on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZXWHswqCQo

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

There's a pretty big discussion on this one already.

[comeau1337 21]

Sorry. I searched everything with the words "robot" in this specific forum, tried to search robot jox but since "jox" is only 3 characters it won't let me use it as a search term. I thought I went through all the "robot" inclusive posts..

[BIzo 3]

I would like to vote for this movie as well. I remember watching this at least 10 times as a kid because my brother would always watch this pile of crap. I hated it, but I would actually love a reason to watch this movie again to see this through the eyes of an adult as I haven't watched it since I was maybe 7. Might be fun to hear the guys tear it apart.

[HotSaucerman 2051]

Remember that movie? I remember asking my dad to rent that movie a bunch of times when I was little. Looking at it now, its just plain awful.