Colfax McLiverneck

Why was Tenvel afraid of Sevenvel? Because Sevenvel stabbed Ninevel.

Did you see the Elon Musk cameo in Tusk? He was the mollusk busker dressed in corn husks at dusk. This catchphrase has been brought to you by the sound “usk”.

One, two, buckle my shoe. Three, four, buckle my other shoe.

Scotty the Auckman / Had a very nondescript sweater / With a tricorn hat and similarly anachronistic breeches and waistcoat / And two eyes made out of fossilized microscopic Carboniferous life forms

Analysis? Check. Audit? Check. Control? Check. Inquiry? Check. Research? Check. Review? Check. Thesaurus.com? Check.

This really boils my corn, McG. I challenge you to a catchphrase duel!

Jesus Christ Superstar? More like Jungle Crab Gooberslaw.

Hot buttered corn? Check. Earwolf in my earholes? Check. Rotary self-inking green rubber "check" stamp? Check.

This podcast fills me with happy and joy. More so than anything except a fresh ear of hot buttered corn. Thanks Jess and Zack!

Great catchphrase, could use more corn

I don’t know but I’ve been told / “Eskimo pussy” is mighty problematic, if not outright racist

Father Mulcahy was full of patriarchal malarkey.

If you want to destroy my sweater, first you should probably ask yourself “Is it the sweater, or the guy wearing the sweater?” And then you should stop writing shitty songs.

Tom Bosley. You will never find a more wretched excuse for a "That '70s Show" guest star.

Winner of the 2018 Des Moines Weekly Bugle’s Reader’s Choice Award for “Leading Cause of Cattle Mortality Due to Eye Roll Disease”

Lord willin’ and the creek don’t rise, this river will flow again one day and we can attribute it to divine intervention.

One if by land / Two if by sea / Three if by air / (Xa-B/31) times the square root of 71N if by transdimensional wormhole

This is just to say that I have eaten the ear of corn that was in the icebox which you were probably saving for a butt plug—and boy am I glad I got to it first, though it was strangely warm

Scarecrow shakin’ in the dead of night / Scare those goddamn crows right off my corn / All summer long / I’ve been waiting for those delicious yellow cobs

Secret rock history: Duran Duran was originally Duran Duran Duran, until the youngest of the Duran triplets was trampled to death by a stampede of Moog cows

You can win a personalized catchphrase by guessing how many corn nuts are in my pocketses!

Alveolar fricative. Dentolabial sibilant. Pharyngeal diphthong. This has been Sexy Phonetics with your host, Hott Linguistman.

Eenie meenie miny Moe / Larry, Curly, Corny / Catch a tiger by his balls / And ask him if he's horny!

Spoonerize her? I knarely blow her!

If it humps like a duck, grunts like a duck, and spurts like a duck, it’s probably adult film star Drake Cockhold.