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Topics posted by Colfax McLiverneck
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Arguably an astoundingly atrocious appetizer, award-aggregating actress Amy Adams' acorn and anchovy applesauce altogether annihilated her Annual Augu
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 310 views
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I've seen fire and I've seen rain/I've seen fields of corn that I thought would never end/I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend/But I
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 443 views
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Pro tip from Cornpone the Avenger: "Hey kids! Never count your cobs before they're shucked. See you next time byeeeeee!."
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 308 views
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In an audacious display of nefariousness, the Cornburglar has struck again—and the Jolly Green Giant is totally butt-hurt about it, if you know what
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 362 views
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She’s a dog in the streets and a log in the sheets. And by that I mean she’s a werewolf that shits the bed.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 303 views
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Welcome to Ruth's Chris's ruthless Christmas briss booth! There's free popcorn on the way out.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 361 views
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99 cobs of corn on the wall/99 cobs of corn/Take one down, shove it up your butt/98 cobs of corn on the wall
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 306 views
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Breaking: The Cob Robber KOed the Turd Burglar early in the third round.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 309 views
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We need to talk about Kevin Bacon's creamed corn fetish.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 434 views
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What do these words have in common: festooned, figment, flanged, corn, frigate, and fuselage? If you said "They all start with F," you're wrong!
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 309 views
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A dark night in a city that knows how to appreciate anti-comedy. On the 12th floor of the Earwolf building, one man is still trying to find the an
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 335 views
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Well, it's been a quiet week in Lake Cornbegone.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 326 views
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I hear that old piano/From down the avenue/I smell the cornbread burning/I look around for the nearest fire escape
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 628 views
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And that's the news from Lake Woe-be-here, where all the women are dead, all the men are also dead, and all the children are worshipping Satan in the
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 311 views
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And that's the news from Lake Wobegon, where I once lost a game of cornhole to Donnie Wahlberg.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 424 views
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And here's the news from Lake Ho-Begone: yo mamma was bludgeoned to death with a can of corn.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 332 views
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Gratuitous use of the word "corn" in a sentence in which it has no business being.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 434 views
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I'll take "Corn" for $400, Alex. And I'll take it rectally, please. Can you slap me around a little bit, too?
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 311 views
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Candy-corn-flavored corn in cans shaped like colossal candy corns? 'Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 387 views
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Corn Y Carnitos Gorditos Locos Supremos con Guillermos del Toros? Esta acceptablos.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 395 views
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I got a fever, and the only cure is more corn.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 782 views
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Concerning Colonel Corcoran's calico cat's condition—careless cup crazing caused a cornfield conflagration, consuming Carbondale's campaign center, co
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 335 views
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My new novel "The Obtuse Lamentations of Colfax McLiverneck" is now available for purchase at amazon.corn
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 341 views
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I find it auspicious that your cornbread is delicious; it would be quite propitious if it were also nutritious.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 316 views
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My shirt is approximately the same color as yours. It appears as though you and I received the same memo. Do you have a syringe of corn syrup?
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 337 views