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Days Won
3
Topics posted by Colfax McLiverneck
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What do we want? Time travel! When do we want it? It doesn’t matter!
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 444 views
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And now the floor is open for access to the crawlspace.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 348 views
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Thanks to Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle, we are unable to simultaneously provide the position and the velocity of your meth order.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 299 views
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Eenie meenie miney Moe, Larry, Curly, Corny / Catch a tiger by has balls and ask him if he's horny!
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 353 views
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Fact: Teddy Roosevelt’s daughter Alice had a pet garter snake named Emily Spinach.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 436 views
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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, and you can pick a banjo, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose with a banjo.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 359 views
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This podcast may seem to you like the Old West, in that you may want to hang me as a varmit for a-rustlin’ horseflesh.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 384 views
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- 0 replies
- 274 views
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An elephant shot me while I was in my pajamas this morning; how he got that big-ass elephant finger inside the trigger guard, I’ll never know.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 258 views
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I find it odd that no one has acknowledged the 800-pound can of corn behind the water cooler.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 246 views
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I can’t even remember the last time I womped it up :(
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 318 views
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And The Lord of Hosts said unto Jason, “Journey forth to the corner store, and there you shall buy a Jumbo Drink and a Bag of Corn Chips, and these sh
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 320 views
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You can lead a horse to water. I’m giving you permission.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 337 views
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Dear Mr. Aukerman: We regret to inform you that your application for corn-picker at McLiverneck Farms, Inc. has been rejected. Sincerely, Yo Mamma.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 319 views
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- 289 views
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Whoa whoa whoa there, Jimmy—you’re saying you “cracked corn” all day? What the hell am I paying you for? And what the hell even is “cracking corn”?!”
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 272 views
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Her hair was as yellow as corn. Her eyes were as firm as grapes. Her skin was as creamy as mashed potatoes. I was in love—and I was hungry.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 319 views
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Here’s what we know so far, officer: he brushed away the blue-tailed fly, then he cracked corn. Oh, and I don’t care.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 377 views
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Fact: in the real ending of Rumplestiltskin, he drives his leg into the ground in a fit of rage and then rips his own body in half and dies.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 406 views
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Morphologically similar to Homo habilis, 2.2 million-year-old Heynong Man remains have been found in the very act of slaying Neandertang.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 430 views
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- 0 replies
- 419 views
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Hey—excuse me, Mr. Nongman—can you scratch my back? Right there. No, a little higher. To the left. No, your left. Down a bit OH GAHD YESSSSS
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 276 views
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- 0 replies
- 402 views
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Oh, the places you’ll go, like to the goddamn store to get the goddamn creamed corn like I asked you to do two goddamn hours ago!!
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 386 views
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Knock knock. Who’s there? No, it’s Horton. Horton who? No, you’re Who. Can you hear me? Yes, I can hear you.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 408 views