achoohorsey16

Terrible wife of Steve Mnuchin directs, writes, and stars in this film about an even worse version of herself who may also be a murderer. For some reason she gets a roommate to live in her giant mansion and it’s Gossip Girl’s Ed Westwick. Turns out he’s there to steal one of her cars. But they fall in love, and when Ed comes back she tried to murder him for stealing the car. Now to be completely fair, I don’t know that the film has released yet, but there’s several trailers and the film seems terrible.

I don’t have a whole lot to say, other than this film is literally The Parent Trap but not The Parent Trap and also stars the Olsen Twins instead of LiLo. Also the twins aren’t related. They just happen to be twins... somehow. Stars the Olsens, Kirsti Alley, and Steve Gutenberg. I find the Olsens insufferable even though as a kid I was obsessed with them. IMDB: https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0113442/

AV Club just did a great retrospective on this film and how bad it is. It's worth a read.

I went ahead and created a public YouTube playlist of all the HDTGM movies (that I could find), so enjoy! Also I have some updating to do, sorry about that. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLBZYknQctAB1O9qYp6CFA6wehZwx35f98

It's been almost ten years since this film came out, and it needs to be reviewed. Each installment of the film (3 films total) had to completely recast every role because I'm sure the earlier actors didn't want anything to do with the series anymore. Anyway, bump.

Bump. This movie is also hella racist against Asians. It's shocking how many racist slurs and jokes Jay Leno says.

Bump, this would be a fun one.

Bump this. I saw it for the first time today. Visually it's cool but Beatty is terrible in the role (I'm not really a fan in general tbh) and the plot is as empty as a vacuum.

Holy god bump bump bump. Just saw this movie and it's so terrible in a great way. I will die if they cover this film. Paul - It will not disappoint.

Bump bump bump. This movie is atrocious. I honestly was speechless after five minutes because of how much talking was in that five minutes. It left me exhausted. Yes, there are some boring, preachy chunks. But the other parts are unbelievably bad and need to be discussed.

Bump

You got here before I did. This quote from the I09 review is glorious:

Playmobil: The Movie Dir. Lino DiSalvo Wr. Lino DiSalvo, Blaise Hemingway Star. Anya Taylor-Joy, Gabriel Bateman Oh boy. Well we have a new movie record - This new animated film based on the French toy line has had a crappy opening. According to Variety, "Stx's animated adventure generated less than $1 million despite launching in 2,337 North American theaters and now stands as one of the worst opening weekends of all time." It's interesting to note that the film's ticket entry price was $5, lower than the average movie ticket price. I've never heard of a film doing this before, so if you know of any others, please let us know. I'm sure it was trying to compensate going up against Frozen II. But c'mon, it should have just pushed back release. Or, you know, gone straight to DVD or just never come out. Somehow this movie cost $75 million to make. So it's definitely a write-off for the producers. By the way, Stx was the distributor, and I believe they came up with the $5 ticket price gimmick. And they don't really sounds like they give a shit about having such a flop on their hands - They're not losing money here so who cares? Also, the movie actually played internationally in August. Oversees, it only made $12.5 million. All of these details and more are in that Variety article above.

I tried watching this movie when I was in college and had to turn it off after 30 minutes. Just too grotesque. And for a movie trying to be sexy, it was anything but.

Dir. Joe Brooks Wr. Joe Brooks & Martin Davidson Starring: Joe Brooks and Shelley Hack The guy who wrote "You Light Up My Life" by Debby Boone wrote, directed, and starred in this movie. In fact, he also wrote and directed the MOVIE "You Light Up My Life," of which the song was written for. He stars as a fictional version of himself, essentially, who's past love keeps gaslighting him and that's supposed to be cute, I guess. She wants to date him, then doesn't, then does, then doesn't, then does. Meanwhile he's miserable even though he makes a lot of money. Speaking of this film, there’s a song in it called California, that was going to be the title of the film, and Debby Boone recorded a song with the same name for the film. It only charted at #50 on the Billboard charts and was dropped from the official soundtrack. Roberta Flack recorded a version of the title song, but that version was also not on the soundtrack. She's said that she hated the song and only did it for a lot of money. Anyway the movie is littered with goofy songs he wrote and sweeping, sappy orchestral filler. It’s almost more of a showcase of his songwriting than a film with a plot. One song is about writing commercial jingles and the contrast between it and the shitty acting is hilarious. It’s almost got dialogue reminiscent of The Room, but not QUITE that bad. You know how in The Room, there’s a lot of scenes of nothing sandwiched between musical score? Ok, same thing here. If you don't know who Joe Brooks is, I suggest a Google search because he's a fascinating guy, for not-so-great reasons. He wrote a lot of commercial jingles and later in life (2009), was charged with over 90 counts of rape or sexual assault as part of a casting-couch scam he worked up with his personal assistant. He committed suicide before the trial, I believe. He also wrote songs for musicians and a bonkers musical in the early 2000's. He seemed like a real piece of shit. His son is in prison for murdering his then-girlfriend (the son's, that is). FUN FACT: Shelley Hack is probably best known for starring in the commercial for the perfume "Charlie." So, hell of an actress. I would provide some second opinions, but the movie was released in VHS and nothing else since, so I don't think it would even be on Amazon. However, I did find the movie on YouTube here, if you're interested. Some people in the comments seems to give the film high praise. I don't get it. It's a very bland, bad movie. Also, Joe Brooks deserves to be shamed for the creepy fuck he was. Has anyone else actually seen this film? I had only heard about it recently and that's how I stumbled across the film on YouTube, and I watched the whole thing and also fell asleep.