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TootyBut2DButt

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Topics posted by TootyBut2DButt

  1.  

    I hate being the third wheel when I hang out with friends, especially once the sex starts.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 201 views
  2.  

    It’s thyme to nutmeg, I’m cumin.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 218 views
  3.  

    Here’s an OJ verdict for you; pulp sucks.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 207 views
  4.  

    Why do we always have time for Tickle-Me-Elmo but never for Tickle ME, Elmo?

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 207 views
  5.  

    I don’t care if Lester Holt is going to be there I’m not going to something called “a fart party”.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 224 views
  6.  

    In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is probably running a lot of errands for people.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 211 views
  7.  

    You may have made lemonade out of lemons but I made milk out of lemons, so who’s the optimist now!

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 215 views
  8.  

    I put an “about the author” page in my autobiography because fuck you!

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 270 views
  9.  

    Sound of light, sound of speed, you'll never guess how fast I peed.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 205 views
  10.  

    I don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep 'cause I'd miss you babe, and I don't have object permanence.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 216 views
  11.  

    Blaming your pants for making your butt look fat is very petty.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 220 views
  12.  

    There’s nothing more embarrassing than cumming on your own face, except for cumming on your own face while on Jeopardy. That Trebek is a real kink-shamer.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 219 views
  13.  

    If you want to read more books, I'd recommend reading shorter books.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 203 views
  14.  

    I've got an addictive personality; people can't get enough of my personality.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 214 views
  15.  

    I saw a baseball sized spider, it was terrifying, then I saw a spider sized baseball; equally terrifying.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 222 views
  16.  

    It’s only worth getting a warranty for your penis if it’s extended.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 218 views
  17.  

    Rupaul is trying to make drag racing an Olympic sport.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 244 views
  18.  

    Being a chick magnet is fun until you work with another chick magnet and you magnetically repel each other.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 214 views
  19.  

    You make me sick. Not the fun sick where you lay in bed eating soup and watching Cheers, the bad sick, where you have diarrhea so stinky your wife leaves you.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 240 views
  20.  

    Prepare to have your funny-bones ticked, your knees slapped and while you’re distracted your left kidney removed and sold for a profit.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 214 views
  21.  

    Other countries need to start posting videos of their citizens saying dumb shit. That would make me feel a lot better.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 206 views
  22.  

    One must never forget the spice trade.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 261 views
  23.  

    I’m all about two things; lukewarm beer and average sized titties.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 237 views
  24.  

    When I suckle at the teat, I take it neat.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 230 views
  25.  

    If I were The Weekend I'd constantly be signing "everybody's working for the weekend" at my employees.

    By TootyBut2DButt, in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    • 0 replies
    • 217 views
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