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the constant pardner

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Everything posted by the constant pardner

  1. the constant pardner
    I just got a great deal on a pair of baby shoes, never even worn!
  2. the constant pardner
    If I may interject, the correct word is hanged, not hung. Your father hanged himself. But I digress.. so you're staying in this evening?
  3. the constant pardner
    If eating ass is weird, consider me Al Yankovic
  4. the constant pardner
    Heads up, my first guest is a real scumbag. I recommend skipping the first half hour of the show.
  5. the constant pardner
    Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might, shoot a milky wad tonight
  6. the constant pardner

    Did someone fart in here or are we finally having that leftover turkey?

    the constant pardner replied to Euripides’ Shorts's topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    I've never wanted a submission to win more than I want this one to win
  7. the constant pardner

    Let’s duck-rabbit this fuck habit.

    the constant pardner replied to Euripides’ Shorts's topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Dag nabbit
  8. the constant pardner
    The ice man cometh, but he makes sure the ice woman cometh first
  9. the constant pardner

    Rectum? Damn near scrotum!

    the constant pardner posted a topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Rectum? Damn near scrotum!
  10. the constant pardner
    Let's not beat around the bush... I'm here to skeet upon your tush
  11. the constant pardner
    Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang! I have to level with you here folks, this week's guests are pretty bad, even by our standards. But there's always next week right?
  12. the constant pardner
    If at first you don't succeed, put new socks upon your feet. But if at twice you fail once more, rub your dick against a door.
  13. the constant pardner
    Unfortunately this week we have decided to put an end to our long-standing tradition of picking a new catchphrase submitted by our listeners. The catchphrases were becoming too vulgar and childish. Now go fart on your boner you fucking puke face.
  14. the constant pardner

    It’s not funny ... my ass is on fire

    the constant pardner replied to adamgryphon's topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Mr Bungle
  15. the constant pardner
    A hand in the bush is worth two in the pink
  16. the constant pardner
    The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time to plant a tree was 19 years and 364 days ago. Today is a shitty day to plant a tree compared to every day since then. You had twenty years, what the fuck were you doing?
  17. the constant pardner
    Don't shit on my leg and tell me it's raining shit
  18. the constant pardner
    Well spit on my dick, it's free-handjob Nick!
  19. the constant pardner
  20. the constant pardner
    If you are bad, then I'm your dad. If you're the bomb, then be my mom. But if you must queef, then we've got beef!
  21. the constant pardner

    Penis as peen does

    the constant pardner posted a topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Penis as peen does
  22. the constant pardner
    If my dog was as ugly as you, I would shave his butt and train him to understand that people love him for his companionship, quirky personality and most of all his bangin shaved turd cutter.
  23. the constant pardner
    I'll bet you dollars to donuts this economy moves toward a fried pastry-based currency
  24. the constant pardner
    Exchanging commodities and/or labor for money is my business, and business is good
  25. the constant pardner
    The CDC can C Deez nuts. They must wash their hands though.
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