All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances but be sure to first ask them which one is which before your grand entrance

[All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances but be sure to first ask them which one is which before your grand entrance]

All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances but be sure to first ask them which one is which before your grand entrance.

[Now is the springtime of our discontent, aka tent.]

Now is the springtime of our discontent,  aka tent.

[When you ask your dog if she needs to take a walk and she farts in response, that's a good dog. Direct and to the point.]

When you ask your dog if she needs to take a walk and she farts in response, that's a good dog. Direct and to the point.

[Jared Leto has promised that our Lord and Savior, The Tiger King, will save us all if we drink blood from Charlie Sheen.]

Jared Leto has promised that our Lord and Savior, The Tiger King, will save us all if we drink blood from Charlie Sheen.

[We interrupt this catchphrase for a very important bulletin. President Trump has recommended everyone drink Kool Aid to cure themselves of Corona.]

We interrupt this catchphrase for a very important bulletin. President Trump has recommended everyone drink Kool Aid to cure themselves of Corona.

[Hi I'm Dr. Aukerman. Please turn your head and cough. No, this isn't a prostate exam, I just thought you'd feel more relaxed if I did this while I tested you for Corona]

Hi I'm Dr. Aukerman. Please turn your head and cough. No, this isn't a prostate exam, I just thought you'd feel more relaxed if I did this while I tested you for Corona.

[She's Nancy Pelosi, she ain't no Bela Legosi, but my I'm hoping she can suck the blood from Turnip Trump and it will be her biggest glory!]

She's Nancy Pelosi, she ain't no Bela Legosi, but my I'm hoping she can suck the blood from Turnip Trump and it will be her biggest glory!

[I try to bring the funny, even when the days aren't sunny, I'm hoping I'll get stimulated by Trump's package, and then I'll spend a little money.]

I try to bring the funny, even when the days aren't sunny, I'm hoping I'll get stimulated by Trump's package, and then I'll spend a little money.

[I'm happy for comedy in this day and age for it's the only thing that can take my mind away in a daze. When things look dim, we can look to within, and look forward to better daze.]

I'm happy for comedy in this day and age for it's the only thing that can take my mind away in a daze. When things look dim, we can look to within, and look forward to better days. 

[This is Auky Scoterman from espn the ocho, I am here reporting on the hedgehog races. We are waiting for one more hedgehog to make itself into a ball before we get started. Back to you Jason.]

This is Auky Scoterman from espn the ocho, I am here reporting on the hedgehog races. We are waiting for one more hedgehog to make itself into a ball before we get started. Back to you Jason.

[No jazz fest, no movies, no playing in the park, but at least I can't see you, the one who broke my heart]

No jazz fest, no movies, no playing in the park, but at least I can't see you, the one who broke my heart

[New Catch Phrase Submission]

Embarrassing to admit but is title where I put catchphrase in and then tag as "new catchphrase submission"? I can't seem to do it correctly.

[New Catch Phrase Submission]

In the time of Corona, the dogs finally take over.

[New catchphrase submission]

Let's hope Trump's federal package is not freakishly small and holds more money than Toad's Mario Kart.

[New Catchphrase submissions]

This just in. Bananarama and the remaining members of Blind Melon and The Cranberries have announced they are forming a super group called The Smoothies.

[New catchphrase submission]

Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any wool? Sorry to speak sheeplish I only took Sheep from 5th to 7th grade and my father made me drop out of school to work on the farm. 

[New catchphrase submission]

As I sit in the library, I notice my chest is hairy but not Mary's, how contrary said Larry. Mary also said that's a lie about the cockleshells. 

[New catchphrase submission]

Fly me to the moon
Let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter and Mars
In other words, get me the fuck off this planet right now I've finished my queue on Netflix and Amazon and can't leave the house.

[New catchphrase submission]

We now know that reddish/orange hair and face is not just a sign of ineptitude but may mean you have Covid 19. 

[New catchphrase submission]

Netflix and chill is now Netflix when ill. 

[New catchphrase submission]

Hey, nineteen
No, we got nothin' common
No, we can't dance together
No, we can't talk at all
Please take me along when you slide on down.

[New catchphrase submission]

When it's cold in the winter you gotta get a mitten, when it's cold in the winter, it's nice to have a kitten, when it's warm in the summah, it's nice to have a Howie, when he charts everyone hears it, he's like a one man party. 

[New catchphrase submission]

Sometimes there's a woman... I won't say a hero, 'cause, what's a hero? But sometimes, there's a woman. And well, she's the woman for her time and place. She fits right in there. And that's Lauren Lapkus, in Los Angeles.

[New catchphrase submission]

You may think I don't give a damn about green eggs and ham but actually it's my no 1 jam. 

[New catchphrase submission]

I wish, I wish, I wish I were a fish but instead I am a dish at this 2 star seafood restaurant.