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StopEatingBees

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Everything posted by StopEatingBees

  1. StopEatingBees
    David's parents have three kids. Two are named Penny and Nickel. What's the third kid's name? Dime. David's dead. Gallagher
  2. StopEatingBees
    This is an All Gallagher Jokes, All The Time account now. Don't use this as a catchphrase
  3. StopEatingBees
    Wait, if King Solomon is chopping these watermelons in half, then that means Gallagher must be... Uh oh
  4. StopEatingBees
    I like my men the same way I like my coffee. Hot, strong, and up my asshole.
  5. StopEatingBees
    Oh, you like milk? Name 3 titties.
  6. StopEatingBees
    Personally, I never finish any of my business. That way, I can definitely come back as a ghost after I die.
  7. StopEatingBees
    I'm breeding a dog that's half bulldog, half Shihtzu. I'll call it... a fuckin asshole
  8. StopEatingBees
    I guess my brain on drugs is a lot like a frying egg, they both happen around breakfast.
  9. StopEatingBees
    Part of me knows I'd have fought harder for a better life if I'd been born with a smaller dick
  10. StopEatingBees
    Can I still help with a jellyfish sting if it burns when I pee?
  11. StopEatingBees
    There's a good reason why you never heard of MC Nail.
  12. StopEatingBees
    You hold a lot of tension in your butthole, make sure to unclench periodically.
  13. StopEatingBees
    If I can pick how I'm executed, I'd like to be sucked up by the Price Is Right showcase showdown wheel
  14. StopEatingBees
    Girl, are you Thanksgiving dinner? Because I'm highly enthusiastic about your rolls.
  15. StopEatingBees
    Thanks to childhood fairy tales, I really believed we could just rescue my grandma from inside that wolf.
  16. StopEatingBees
    I've always said the greatest nation in the world is masturbnation
  17. StopEatingBees
    My dick stopped working. Guess it's collecting more from unemployment.
  18. StopEatingBees
    When I die, clear my browser history. I don't need anyone knowing how hard I've researched Subway tuna sandwiches
  19. StopEatingBees
    I miss 100% of the shots I took. Whiskey. Tequila. They're fuckin gone, man. Forever. And for what?
  20. StopEatingBees
    Ain't no way to put it subtle, when I wanna cuckold
  21. StopEatingBees
    If I could lift a gallon jug of milk, I wouldn't NEED to do my body good.
  22. StopEatingBees
    In wine, there is truth, you adopted ass bitch
  23. StopEatingBees
    I don't know with what weapons World War 3 will be fought, but World War 4 will be fought with turtle shells and banana peels
  24. StopEatingBees
    Kids these days don't know shit about handkerchiefs
  25. StopEatingBees
    My mama told me, don't bother shopping around, nothing matters and we're all gonna die
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