StopEatingBees

If you can't handle me at my worst, you must not be immune to lava. I'm made of lava at my worst.

Then I left a bee, now I'm a bee leaver

Actually, Loch Ness is the name of the doctor

The difference between me and Humpty Dumpty is, I'm alive. And not an egg. And I don't live under fealty to an incompetent monarch.

I tried to blow bubbles and hug babies, instead I hugged bubbles and went to prison forever

A hunter fired his gun once and shot a John, a Cougar, and a Mellencamp. How is this possible?

A movie that follows the full bushes of a tight-knit group of 20-somethings while a genuinely affecting romantic comedy plays out above them

Come together, right now, on this biscuit

If it's not full bush, I'm not half interested

A stranger is just a friend whose windowless van you haven't gotten into yet

Hey buddy, there's only three things I'm allergic to - onions, carrots, and being slowly boiled alive in a man-sized cauldron of cannibal soup

Oh, you like the stock market and guys with ED? Well I've got some Microsoft for you

No animals were harmed in the making of this film, except for when we called them eight legged freaks, that did sting a bit

For real

Tonight girl, it's just you, me, and You, Me, & Dupree

RIP Uncle Robin, he's molesting cherubs in heaven now

Oh damn, did I accidentally catchphrase my pre-emptive obituaries again

Can't come in today boss, I got the urethra queefs

What the hell are you singing about pie for? Two talented men died on that plane, Donald!

As R. Kelly said during jellyfish season, don't worry, you'll be fine

I can only poop if I know God is watching

A little bit softer now! And a little bit softer now! Safe to stand up in 3, 2, 1...

It's time to pay the piper $15 an hour

She deserves a living wage. THAT'S RIGHT, it's a chick, you sexists

Peter Pan went from a flying eternal child to a joyless peanut butter tycoon, where's THAT movie