Episode 22 — Jon Gabrus, Our Close Friend

[OcterDoctopus 1079]

agata since you're new I guess I should give you some Scoop Troop insider info. Just a little bit about where the forums were heading and get you caught up to speed. What it all really comes down to is if you think that this one user, Chanson, is being inflammatory or rude or just abusing the Like button on too many posts then you should BANHAMMER him

[DEATHMAN 3317]

I'm really smart AND strong

[Freja 1290]

Hopefully Hayes will still be able to make it to next week's episode after being sucked into a vortex

 

 

Notice how it's only his lower half that's blurry? I think somebody's still a little self-conscious about his butt implant accident on the highway. #conspiracy #photoshoptruther

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Notice how it's only his lower half that's blurry? I think somebody's still a little self-conscious about his butt implant accident on the highway. #conspiracy #photoshoptruther

 

It's a... uh... a part on the.. uh... *male* anatomy that. uh... he's been gifted in such... a way that... endowed by his creator... with this male part... that is self-evident... that all men are not created equal in this... uh... department...

[DrBlueJeanns 44]

preeeeeetty sure the padres are an art team

[DrBlueJeanns 44]

Did you guys like the reunion episode of The Bachelor?

[greggy 15909]

hi good show

[Toby Keith Sweat 1000]

Hopefully Hayes will still be able to make it to next week's episode after being sucked into a vortex

 

 

that black hole isnt going to suck them up, is it?

[MattCameron 595]

Let me also welcome the new admin! aGLADa to meet you!

 

A little update from the old MattCameron camp: I was so inspired by today's episode and that I decided to go on what some might call a "spree" of "freeing" a number of cars from the "shackles of the human race" (i.e., returning them to the Earth™). So if anyone wants to hold off on their weekly donation to HH and maybe give to my Kickstarter for my recent legal fees, it would be much appreciated.

[greggy 15909]

sorry matt i used my kickstarter budget on a movie about people who listen to or make podcasts, which was very important to me b/c i was seconds away from killing myself but then i heard "doodie calls" and hearing about dumps saved my life

[burdrulz 1760]

 

hey octerdoctopus, i'm forever lurking in these forums

 

lurking for the weekend

[JulyDiaz 2797]

all this white knight talk reminded me of this super cool and funny martin lolwrence movie

 

[greggy 15909]

i remeber being very excited for that movie because i liked 'blue streak' a lot until i saw the trailer :c

wonder if blue streak holds up at all

[kobthatreal 5896]

I hate to show my ignorance here because I know you jackals will never let me hear the end of it, but I didn't know about the whole bubbles being around us and helping us get sick hang time on dunks and stuff. My question is, are there more bubbles in space? Is that why Sandy Bullock floated around so much in Gravity? You would think a brilliant NASA scientist like herself would know that she could just pop those teeny tiny little bubbles and gently float back down to Earth into the waiting arms of George Clooney.

 

Just wanted to add a little something about the bubbles and how they help you climb the ladder and throw down the hammer, which is a metaphor for dunking and not something you should literally do.

 

Warning: Vague Conspiracy Theory

 

In 1978, David Stern is named General Counsel of the NBA. One year later Nike develops air bubble technology in shoes, harnessing the bubbles around us which over 99% of us do not have the natural ability to control. This allowed players to jump higher than ever before. Coincidence? No. If you see footage of players dunking before 1979 you will notice that most of the footage is grainy and really can't be trusted. In 1984, the year of squid, Michael Jordan inks a contract with Nike and David Stern becomes Commissioner of the NBA. Stern negotiates a deal with Nike to split NBA revenue, but only if they share it's bubble tech with competing shoe companies in order to make the NBA full of high flyers. That's why to this day literally every NBA basketball player wears shoes with bubbles in them. I would write more but they(NBA & Nike execs) are probably reading this and I don't know if Sean and Hayes would keep their anonymity agreement with me if it meant they would lose some of their toys to a couple of baseball bats swung by the Bear Jew David Stern. Ironic? I'm not positive of the words meaning. Insane? Maybe. True? Every. Fucking. Word.

[robinsbruce 4985]

i remeber being very excited for that movie because i liked 'blue streak' a lot until i saw the trailer :c

wonder if blue streak holds up at all

 

Blue Streak? Oh yeah, it still nailed it.

[chanson 9697]

Let me be the first to welcome our new mod(ess?), Sant'Agata Bolognese (I assume that's what "agata" is a reference to, because I also assume you drive a Lamborghini. [i promise this makes sense if you know about cars, specifically Lamborghinis and where they are built.])

 

Just so you know, I'm pretty much the resident rabble-rouser here at Hollywood Handjobs and you'll need to watch me like a (sea)hawk because I'm a mean bitch.

 

Everything else you need to know is in this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tP2XtYbIgD0

 

You're welcome.

 

PS - I hold you personally responsible for the fact that I have already run out of 'likes' for the day. Strike one.

[burdrulz 1760]

that vortext thing you guys were talking about happened some more i think.

 

 

hot forums again so far. so hot oh yeah

[greggy 15909]

that picture is starting to give me the creeps, i hope nothing worse happens to it

[Hunter 96]

Uh Oh.

 

[greggy 15909]

OH G*D TGHIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I HOPED WOULD NOT HAPPEN

[agata 2789]

Let me be the first to welcome our new mod(ess?), Sant'Agata Bolognese

 

thank you, but you are not the first and therefore i'm removing your posting privileges for 24 hours for lying.

[robinsbruce 4985]

Uh Oh.

 

 

Im just so happy it's not a Dracular. TOO SCARY!

[hugLife 492]

thank you, but you are not the first and therefore i'm removing your posting privileges for 24 hours for lying.

 

In here busting shots! That must be why her name starts with a gat!

 

 

...are we still doing the name puns?

[chanson 9697]

 

thank you, but you are not the first and therefore i'm removing your posting privileges for 24 hours for lying.

 

I was implying that I was the first one that mattered. I mentioned I'm a mean bitch. Now you know.

 

...also, I'm not sure being delusional is the same as lying.

[Toby Keith Sweat 1000]