Hollywood Handbook Forum Fantasy Football Federation

[SteveH 11126]

Ladies and Gentlemen of the forums:

 

The NFL season is less than 1 month away. This means, more importantly, that fantasy football season will also be here in less than a month's time.

 

The purpose of this post is to gauge interest of forum members willing to participate in a 12 team fantasy league.

 

If more than 12 people express interest, tough decisions will need to be made, but I don't anticipate that being a problem.

 

Hayziebone and Clemdawg are encouraged to participate. Entry into the league will require you to share your email address. If that makes you uncomfortable, feel free to create a new account just for this purpose, and please feel reassured that I have no interest in corresponding with any of you via email.

 

There may also be a small monetary contribution, to be pooled and awarded to the winner. The logistic of this will be worked out at a later date, outside of the confines of this forum, so as not to risk any illegalities related to gambling, and potentially implicating Mr. Scripps in any wrongdoing.

 

Please email me at stevehoromanski [at] gmail [dot] com, if you would like to participate. Make sure to include the phrase, "Mr. Boomerang" in the body of your email.

 

Sincerely,

SteveH

 

Commissioner, HHFFFF

[chicknsandwich 2495]

I'm not a dumb jock so I'm not into all this football talk.

[SteveH 11126]

yeah but fantasy football is for nerds and nerds is cool now and jocks is pumping our gas, so you might want to re-think that.

 

[apologies to the forum elders for quoting Sean. I know it's frowned upon, but seemed called for in this particular situation]

[SteveH 11126]

1 taker so far, guys. things are really heating up.

[Game of Scones 5812]

If we can use a VR simulation to inhabit the bodies of real players like that really good movie with Gerry Butlard, then i am in

[SteveH 11126]

Yep that what is is. Send me your email

[seeley 836]

I can confirm that this is the case, as I joined and now am typing this to you from the virtual body of Tampa Bay Buccaneer right guard Ali Marpet.

[elizamuffins 4228]

I can see why you choose to go by SteveH instead of your given name.

[SteveH 11126]

I can see why you choose to go by SteveH instead of your given name.

 

it's been a lifelong struggle. Even I don't really know how to pronounce it. When we got married, my wife was saying she was going to take my name just bc she wants to have the same last name as our son. 2+ years later and no update on that...

[NoahTomaszewski 2768]

I'm in. Also Steve's name isn't that bad

[elizamuffins 4228]

My kids have a last name that ends with wicz. I don't. Long story.

[SteveH 11126]

A Message From Commissioner SteveH:

 

Welcome to the first annual Hollywood Handbook Forum Fantasy Football Federation

Congratulations on your decision to enter the HHFFFF. This is the first step on a long journey that begins amidst the backdrop of the oppressive heat of late summer. Perhaps you'll peruse the magazine section of your local pharmacy or convenience store and pick up a copy of the ESPN or Sports Illustrated Fantasy Football guide, take it home, and casually flip through the pages on your deck or back porch during the last hours of sunlight, as the crickets and frogs begin singing their nightly lullaby.

 

During this phase of the experience; the pre-draft phase, hot summer days begin to give way to cooler nights. The sun is setting earlier now. In the distance you can hear the din of a lawnmower, the sound of children playing happily. Each cool breeze that cuts through the heat of the summer night a bittersweet reminder that another carefree summer vacation is coming to an end. In a few short days or weeks, it's back to school. back to business. back to football.

 

With that, I welcome you to join me in this journey through the phases and seasons that make up a fantasy football season. In the lazy days of August, we're all undefeated. By the time the holiday season rolls around yet again, some of you will still be standing as champions, yet others limping towards an inevitable defeat.

 

 

 

This is the beauty of fantasy football. It's not just a game. Your fantasy football team is a new family member that will be there with you during labor day barbecues, and your child's first day of school. It will be there the first time you feel the crunch of fallen leaves under your feet. It will be there with you amidst the pumpkin patches and hay rides of October. When you need to seek solace from all of the spookiness of Halloween, your team will be there, waiting for you to adjust its' line-up for the 4th time today. When it's time to gather with family and friends for Thanksgiving, as you've been doing every year for your entire life, you can smile to yourself and think, "I have some new family members this year. I don't need to share them with anyone else, and if they disappoint me on Thanksgiving (as real family tends to do), I can drop them with the push of a button and let someone else deal with them because I AM NOT doing this again on Christmas."

 

 

 

The only "War on Christmas" is week 16 of the NFL season. The fantasy football superbowl. The true reason for the season.

 

 

 

 

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

 

This is water.

 

Today we celebrate our independence.

 

 

 

Stay thirsty, my friends.

[elizamuffins 4228]

Will there be t-shirts?

[SteveH 11126]

maybe the winner gets a t-shirt? and other prizes, like a cool trophy. BUT ONLY ONE PERSON GETS A TROPHY, I DON'T SUBSCRIBE TO THIS 'EVERYONE GETS A TROPHY' PHILOSOPHY LIKE YOU MILLENNIALS AND YOUR SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT.

 

edit: a quick Google search shows that I may actually be one of these millennials, but an old one. I might be the first millennial.

[elizamuffins 4228]

Speaking of football, does anyone else think Tom Brady is totally innocent and should invite Roger Goodell to "suck on these"?

[Blink 1844]

I'm interested. Hayes or Sean should really join.

[SteveH 11126]

yeah he should definitely get way down there and suck on these.

 

I like Tom Brady and I like the Patriots and I don't care who knows it. For some reason, people in the NY/NJ area realllllllly hate the patriots, and I don't totally get it b/c the Giants are not even in the same conference as them (sure, the Jets are in the same division, but no one likes the Jets).

[seeley 836]

Housekeeping item: In honor of Valerie's amazing story, I have renamed my team (FKA Seel Good Story) the Pork Swords.

[Jack Johnson P.I. 3649]

I want to play football with you, my friends. I'll even be towel man of you want.

[souprman 10477]

[apologies to the forum elders for quoting Sean.]

Quoting Sean is really lame.

[Game of Scones 5812]

is this on yahoo or espn

 

your answer may decide my fate

[SteveH 11126]

ESPN

[Game of Scones 5812]

took my email away.

 

too many nudes sent my way

[Blink 1844]

Oh, gross. Yahoo is better.

[elizamuffins 4228]

For the record, I prefer Yahoo as well. I am a real Yahooligan.

 

PS-Fuck the Jets