Episode 53 — Anaconda

[admin 330]

Recorded live at the Bell House with Michael Ian Black join us as we unfurl the catastrophe that is Anaconda! We discuss the cast including Jon Voight who plays his character as a French Robert De Niro from South America, Jennifer Lopez as a documentarian, and a guy named Mateo. We also talk about whether they should have let the snake talk, translation mistakes, and Jon Voight’s surprising athleticism. You mean there are snakes out there this big? Listen to find out.

[Picklefucker 188]

Damn, you guys got deep in this episode. I never realized there was an anaconda in all of us. I'll never sleep again.

[angrykirby 3]

Anaconda is a terrible movie but Ice Cube hits a giant snake in the head with a hatchet then calls him "bitch" so its also the best movie

 

Did You Notice that Jon Voight is never really in the same frame as anyone else The few times he's not isolated in frame its clearly a stand in. He mustve been Like "I aint traveling fucking anywhere just shoot me in front of a green screen at the studio near my house and figure it out in post."

[Gym Sockerman 1326]

Anacondiues Rexica. In which an anorexic anaconda kills his father, sleeps with his mother, and then vomits.

[Lukas Holmes 2287]

This episode made my heart want to essplode. Just perfect.

[JacobCrites 4977]

Anaconda is a terrible movie but Ice Cube hits a giant snake in the head with a hatchet then calls him "bitch" so its also the best movie

 

Did You Notice that Jon Voight is never really in the same frame as anyone else The few times he's not isolated in frame its clearly a stand in. He mustve been Like "I aint traveling fucking anywhere just shoot me in front of a green screen at the studio near my house and figure it out in post."

That totally explains the weirdness I was feeling when watching this movie last night! You're absolutely right. There's only a couple scenes where he actually interacts with the other actors directly.

[pepperjack 303]

They speak Portuguese in Brazil...

[therealMATTLOXLEY 135]

I have always had a soft spot for crappy funny-ish large creature movies.. ive watched this movie soo many times I have never laughed soo fucking hard.. they hit on everything that makes this movie hysterical haha mr ian black is such a great addition.. as partially french voight says thank you baby bird

[wyldride 285]

Chefe is Portuguese for chief, which makes sense with them being in Portuguese speaking Brazil.

[Skeevins 322]

Magic really needs to be on the show more often. He is the crazyass Siskel to Jason's crazyass Ebert.

 

Man, what I wouldn't give to see a remake of Anaconda as a found footage movie with the same cast.

[Lando 2019]

So with this movie, they have done 3 out of the 5 nominees for the worst movie at the 1998 Razzies. The nominees were:

The Postman (won)

Anaconda

Batman & Robin

Fire Down Below

Speed 2

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

I like to refer to anyone that busts out a Tony Montana accent in a movie as being "Scarface"-LESS-than-inspired.

 

Speaking of that, I've heard talks of an upcoming, modernized remake of "Scarface", which makes me wonder this: Will the new Scarface already have a "Scarface" room in his house?

[jakenutting 14]

I like to think of Anaconda as an unofficial sequel to the movie "Deliverance." Jon Voight's character just couldn't deal with real life after the events of Deliverance so he moved down to South America and got caught up in the dangerous world of the Anaconda black market.

[Cabbagehead 61]

"Or the snake is a teleporter, like the X-men Nightcrawler. Bamf!"

 

Awesome.

[jeffsomething 13]

Michael Ian Black was right it was a film camera, the "bullets" paul was talking about while they were wading in the water was the battery belt. At one point I. Cube is using a film changing bag.

[aceload 0]

I was completely caught off guard to see a snake in this film...so +1 for the surprise factor. I also was pleased with Martha Stuart's small yet poignant cameo appearance--she was very convincing when she sold the crew gasoline near the beginning of the film. However, all things considered, I'd have to say that Voight stole the show with his almost discernible accent and fervent South American zeal. Two words: "acting chops"--he has them. To somehow write this performance off as a cheap Pacino/Tony Montana knock-off, is just a want-to-be critic's jealousy on display.

 

I also like the guy who slept through most the film.

[Kickpuncher 5012]

"Or the snake is a teleporter, like the X-men Nightcrawler. Bamf!"

 

Awesome.

 

That was LITERALLY my favorite part of the show. Jason says the first sentence, I say "Bamf" out loud to myself, Jason says it, the crowd cheers, and he shouts "You fuckin' nerds!"

[Cabbagehead 61]

Yeah I was laughing so hard, especially when he said Bamf! I was like, "YES!"

[CapricaSixSixSix 100]

Chefe is Portuguese for chief, which makes sense with them being in Portuguese speaking Brazil.

Oh stop spoiling the fun!

[jsl 36]

Jason, I was just recently thinking about what a big deal Jennifer Lopez's butt was in the 90s. Glad someone else remembers?

[Bamrob 0]

According to IMDB the CGI for the Anacondas cost $100,000 a second not minute. Somebody do that math!

[champion sound 0]

SC = South Central

[therealjayknox 26]

Holy Eff this was an instant classic!

 

I remember when this came out I insisted I would not see it because "I don't think big cartoon CGI snakes are scary".

 

Then we watched this and yep this and I remember a specific scene we replayed about 20 times - J-Lo getting up and turning around. For about 1.3 seconds her superbooty blew our minds.

Now get this weird memory...

...I actually remember watching a movie guy on (i think Politically Incorrect?) talking about how the movie studio received some outrageous number of complaints that Jennifer Lopez's ass was NOT IN THE FILM.

Apparently, they were still shooting 'waist up' as if she had a flaw.

 

Oh man.. yeah Anaconda was just classic badness and I LOVED how someone considered what their 'Documentary' would actually look like as a DVD extra!

 

Absolutely amazing classic HDTGM!!

 

**btw ya.. i never did figure out.. like were they kidnapping them.. or using them as secret bait.. or WTF was the 'bad guys plan' with them?

[ericmci 26]

Sexxx in the Cityy For Dudes!

[JustinL 216]

Michael Ian Black had his facts a little wrong. Danny Trejo used to be a castrato, but after years of being so goddamn manly, them pelotas grew back, mijo!