Colfax McLiverneck
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Content count
2702 -
Joined
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Last visited
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Days Won
3
Topics posted by Colfax McLiverneck
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They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder; I say an abscess makes a corn shart farther.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 322 views
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A long time ago, in a cornfield far, far away, a hoedown went way, way too far with the whole hoe thing.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 329 views
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A woman's work is never done. If she ever suggests that it is, throw two cans of corn at her, and that's why she's got two black eyes! Get it!?
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 305 views
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Mammas, don't let your babies grow up to be cornboys.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 350 views
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A woman's work is never done. If she ever suggests that it is, throw two cans of corn at her, and that's why she's got two black eyes! Get it!?
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 315 views
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A man who is his own lawyer has a fool for a client. A lawyer who is his own client has a man for a foo...you know what? Forget this catchphrase-craft
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 502 views
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There once was a man from Savannah Whose ear was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin as he guzzled his cornshine, "Enough of this limericky
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 346 views
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Once, twice, three times a lady. Thrice, twice, one time your corndoggin' mamma.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 372 views
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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. And also, he totally forgot to buy our tickets to the Omaha Cornfest, so I guess we're headed back to
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 447 views
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- 441 views
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Mexican cornbread? Yes, please! Mexican't cornbread? WHAT! Get outta my face, Danny Trejo, and take your half-baked recipes with you!
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 308 views
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- 364 views
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I have to pick three sides? Wow, well, I guess I'll have the grits, uhhhhhh, the fried okra, and, uh, ummmmm, let's see, uhhhhhhhhhhh, hmmmm, no, wait
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 383 views
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(Normal Auckervoice) Baa, Baa, black sheep, have you any yummy corn? (Sexy Auckervoice) Why yes I do, handsome sire—three scrotes full and shorn.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 386 views
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Sir Adrian Wapcaplet could sell anything—even very small pieces of corn to even smaller travelling corn collectors.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 374 views
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...so I curtailed my Walpole-ing activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy corn fritt
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 497 views
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It was said of Roger the Shrubber that he lingered long after Corn Coberman's funeral, puffing his hashish pipe, humming the chorus to Margaritaville
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 369 views
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Leave your cob under the pillow, my child, and the Corn Fairy will poke kernels into your turdles with his long, cold fingernails while you sleep.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 505 views
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- 381 views
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Today's ep is sponsored by the Cornthusiasts Society of Cornwall, Nebraska. Please visit them online at potatoescansuckit.com.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 343 views
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I spy through my cornea a Bornean euphoniumist named Victoria with sleep apnea and a hernia wearing a hat that says "It's Hornier in California!".
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 368 views
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Jimmy cracked corn, and...hey, wait a minute. Just how does one "crack" corn, anyway?
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 459 views
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Doritos, light of my life, fire of my loins. Bring thy corny goodness hither, and linger awhile.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 420 views
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It was the best of corn, it was the worst of corn. And believe you me, that worst corn was very nasty.
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 288 views
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Concerning Clarence's condition: careless cartwheeling caused a calamitous crash at the cattle crossing, crushing his clavicle and catapulting him int
By Colfax McLiverneck, in New Catchphrase Suggestions
- 0 replies
- 347 views
