Episode 11 — Jake Fogelnest, Our Close Friend

[GedO'Halloran 77]

Sorry you guys, but RSS had to end for some very solid reasons. How long do you think you can just simply take shots at powerful Shark Tank millionaires? Then a show like Whodunnit comes along to let you know that a powerful rich person can have you for real but not for real killed

 

I am thankful to everyone who agrees that RSS should come back.

I was not expecting such an overwhelming show of support. When you keep in mind that for every person posting on the forum there are probably hundreds thinking the same thing but don't have the time or computer skills to post, then one can see how many people are really wanting the show to return!

I think that even Sean and Hayes might be taken aback by the way the public is demanding their return.

They might be getting brought to tears maybe. For it is a wondrous sight to see the flood of support for the RSS. It is truly a Christmas miracle.

 

Unless OcterDoctopus is correct and Sean and Hayes are too scared to return.

[burdrulz 1760]

I liked the Jake Folgenest episode.

 

I liked when he did the download 15.

 

Do you guys blackout?

[chanson 9697]

Burdrulz,

 

I don't blackout. I try real hard but all that happens is that I get very smiley and start accosting people for the purpose of hugging them and telling them I love them. Oftentimes I don't really love them. It's a vicious cycle really.

[hugLife 492]

Hey y'all, I kind of want to follow up the Valery Brian initiative an ask everyone some questions:

 

1. Who is the most high-profile celebrity that you have ever met?

 

2. Aside from everyone who has been a part of "HH," which celebrity would you like to meet (living or dead)?

 

3. What is your favorite type of apple?

 

My answers:

1. Lou Ferrignope

2. Dave Shapel

3. Pink Lady

[xxxCASHMONEY420BLAZEITxxx 34]

1. Who is the most high-profile celebrity that you have ever met?

Mark Wahlberg and Kelsey Grammer were filming a movies sequel about transient farmers or something where I work. Wahlberg was super down-to-earth but Grammer made a weird non sequitur asking if I "shred powder". Didn't get it, just told him I don't ski.

Also met Derek Rosenberg (changed to Derek Rose for marketing reasons) the basketsball star.

 

2. Aside from everyone who has been a part of "HH," which celebrity would you like to meet (living or dead)?

If grumpy cat, keyboard cat, or sleeping dog that runs into wall aren't available, probably Edgar Wright.

 

3. What is your favorite type of apple?

Grapple.

 

 

In response to Ged, RSS had some "regular" people call-ins, but most of the guests were still their comedian/writer friends. But your point is valid in that what made RSS great was the genuineness with which the boys love reality shows, and how making fun of how stupid the shows and contestants on the shows are is so GD hilarious. I get that same feeling with the trailers segment of HH. I don't think think they should go back to reality shows though because there's more than enough material to poke fun at in movies industry.

 

HH (happy holidays) everyone!

[xoValeriexo 4369]

1. Um, Tara Reid (my cousin called her over and asked her for a cigarette. she scoffed, said she'd get one, and never came back. she was right. it was rude). Paul F. Tompkins (he remembered my name BOTH times, no big deal) and Scott Aukerman (he seemed to not enjoy me). Pauly Shore (a scatily clad woman was rubbing his feet and he was yelling at her - jokingly? backstage at Limp Bizkit concert - my cousin blew a security guard to get aftershow passes). Um, I was near Michael Cera (UCB). I was near Aaliyah (Wanna Be a VJ in San Francisco). Method Man (sitting at a merch table at the family values tour in 1999). I've met-ish a lot of fame-ish people. And I used to love Limp Bizkit and I have a rude and slutty cousin. Shut-up.

 

2. I'd love to meet Harris Wittels, Kyle Bosman, Lennon Parham, David Cross, Ricky Gervais.

 

3. The crisp kinds. Like sour and crisp. What kinds are those?

[greggy 15909]

I was near Aaliyah (Wanna Be a VJ in San Francisco). Method Man

dang

[Asteck 1250]

In response to Ged, RSS had some "regular" people call-ins, but most of the guests were still their comedian/writer friends. But your point is valid in that what made RSS great was the genuineness with which the boys love reality shows, and how making fun of how stupid the shows and contestants on the shows are is so GD hilarious. I get that same feeling with the trailers segment of HH. I don't think think they should go back to reality shows though because there's more than enough material to poke fun at in movies industry.

Man, I couldn't have said this better myself. The riffing and the genuine enjoyment of the topics were the bits that really stuck with me. To this day I think about how funny the segment that followed the "What do you have Wes?" clip from The Challenge was, and I don't think they told a single joke! I felt like there was a little of that when they were talking about the reviews of Inside Llewyn Davis this episode too. I also agree there's no need to be limited to Reality Shows, Hollywood is ridiculous enough!

 

For Mr. Huskey, I would be truly honored if you read some of my script Dad to the Bone.

It's a heartwarming family comedy about a distant father who dies tragically in a fire, but is miraculously brought back to life by the love of his son. However, instead of coming back as his normal self, he's a flesh-less skeleton (very scary at first). Over the course of the film he reconnects with his son by helping him solve a series of problems in his life... with the help of his new bony bod. These include: Getting back at the hotshot Actor Bully by switching skulls during a pivotal scene in Hamlet and totally cutting up the audience with a few choice lines that make the bully look like a huge loser. Later he saves the big dance when the power goes out, so his son can kiss his crush, by breaking out some drum sticks and playing a sweet jam on his rib cage like a xylophone, prompting the whole school to Conga-line and get pumped.

There are also some gags where he wakes up and yells "Where's my tibia!?" -Cut to the guilty looking family dog bark going "Aroo!"

I'd tell you the ending but you know you gotta hold back a little milk to sell the cow.

 

Anyways, it's been plenty fun posting here with all of you over the past year. you're all v funny so please continue to be that way

[chanson 9697]

1. Nelson Mandela/George Bush, Jr. (Celebrities?), true though.

 

2. Never meet your heroes. Also, don't have heroes. They probably suck and cry themselves to sleep. If not, they're sociopaths. That in mind, Engineer Cody.

 

3. After consulting with my state's apple commission (bestapples.com [not kidding]), I have decided that it's a three-way tie between honeycrisp, gala, and fujis. They're all amazing. Braeburns are alright, too.

 

Washington Apples, do yourself a favor and get one. Slut. ----- That's the slogan I proposed to the Washington State Apple Commission (again, bestapples.com) when I was head of a marketing consulting firm. They weren't amused. No wonder millennials aren't eating Washington Apples like the boomers do.

 

Also, HugLife, thanks for giving me an opportunity to talk about my state. I'd do it anyway, but now it's actually relevant. So, yeah. Buy Washington Apples.

[greggy 15909]

i want to meet thomas the star of the improv4humans podcast, its on earwolf like this show

[GedO'Halloran 77]

Yea I see what your saying about writer friends on the RSS show, but the are using the seriousness or the earnestness or the attempts at being meaningful of reality show contestants (or hosts) as the " straight man".

And sometimes it was the genuine love of certain shows that the writer guests have that is the meaningful.

 

It's like, if a child just says rude sounding words no one cares. That's not comedy, it's just silliness.

And if you make fun of a child for being silly... none cares, because it's just a silly kid.

But make fun of someone MEANINGFUL who is trying to be SERIOUS like a political figure then that goes into a stand up routine.

There has got to be stakes.

Writers making fun of themselves and being silly about everything because they don't really care about the "industry" does not provide that.

You just end up with sarcasm upon sarcasm.

 

If comedy is "speaking truth to power", then you need the "power".

If comedy is "social sanctions against inflexible behaviour", then you need the "inflexible".

If comedy is "only surprise" like Sean has said on the show, then you need the "earnest" before they can surprise people with their sarcasm.

Otherwise it's sarcasm upon sarcasm and there its no comedy, only silliness.

 

I was hoping the boys would talk about real existential things, things that are the MOST meaningful because they have a rare combination of the unusual intelligence required to contemplate such topics and the masterful wit that would be able to look at such topics in interesting, disarming, insightful, (or even just "surprising") ways.

 

No one else is as funny as these two, but who comes close?

Joe Rogan has a popular podcast. And he invites as guests people that challenge him intellectually while he constantly tries to address the most meaningful.

Bill Burr is funnier than Joe, and he too tries his best to talk about the most meaningful things as he sees it. Banking and political conspiracies, the history of mankind, and he even tries to give people advice on his show and help them.

Now Bill is not a smart man, self admittedly, but he tries his best.

And neither is Joe compared to Sean and Hayes.

But bless their hearts they are trying anyway.

And it's both funny and engaging, and they have two of the most successful podcasts out there.

 

Sean and Hayes are both funnier and smarter than those guys.

Which is why I would love to see what would happen if they went that way.

 

Think about it, even when the "meaningful" element to their comedy was arguably the objectively LEAST meaningful thing there is (reality shows) they created comedy gold. They created one of the funniest shows ever.

Imagine what sort of next level genius comedy they will create if the "meaningful" element became MORE meaningful, or if they pushed the boundaries of the MOST meaningful!

 

Sadly they went the opposite way with HH, but if they didn't... can you imagine??

Comedy Mecca.

 

I hope this doesn't sound ungrateful, I'm VERY grateful for the shows the boys do.

They are brilliant and possibly the best podcasts made so far.

I just see in them the potential to do much more.

A unique set of talents, and a unique pairing of two with these unique talents, in a unique time of history where they can share this with the whole world.

 

Is it just dumb luck that these unique things happened the way they did? Just coincidence? Nothing providential or intelligible behind the design of the universe and the destiny of man?

Even if that is what you think... just unique coincidence, it does not change the fact that its there now.

It is there now, and there are people like me who await to see what Sean and Hayes do with it.

[burdrulz 1760]

you guys should do a dramatic reading of : Cool teens and even cooler parents, getting ahead in this 'internet crazed' society. Keep it 'crunk' but keep it positive.

 

It's a working title, but I really think the kids at the youth group are going to think I myself am a cool mon.

[burdrulz 1760]

Burdrulz,

 

I don't blackout. I try real hard but all that happens is that I get very smiley and start accosting people for the purpose of hugging them and telling them I love them. Oftentimes I don't really love them. It's a vicious cycle really.

 

So seeing this post this morning was very surprising.

[burdrulz 1760]

Hey y'all, I kind of want to follow up the Valery Brian initiative an ask everyone some questions:

 

1. Who is the most high-profile celebrity that you have ever met?

 

2. Aside from everyone who has been a part of "HH," which celebrity would you like to meet (living or dead)?

 

3. What is your favorite type of apple?

 

My answers:

1. Lou Ferrignope

2. Dave Shapel

3. Pink Lady

 

1. I worked at Vice when I was younger and there would be 'cool' famous people walking through there all the time. I saw spike Jonzeeee but didn't 'meet' him. Me and my friend are doing some work for Eugene Mirman and he got to meet him... I still have not got to meet him and I'm very upset about this.

 

2. I'd be cool to meet Eugene... because I feel like I should get to meet him, since my god damn friend got to meet him... fucking friend.

 

3. Fuji Apple with a grape pre-ban four loko

 

(I realize posting actual information about my life isn't necessarily 'funny' or probably not even 'cool' but for some reason I don't care)

[burdrulz 1760]

1. Um, Tara Reid (my cousin called her over and asked her for a cigarette. she scoffed, said she'd get one, and never came back. she was right. it was rude). Paul F. Tompkins (he remembered my name BOTH times, no big deal) and Scott Aukerman (he seemed to not enjoy me). Pauly Shore (a scatily clad woman was rubbing his feet and he was yelling at her - jokingly? backstage at Limp Bizkit concert - my cousin blew a security guard to get aftershow passes). Um, I was near Michael Cera (UCB). I was near Aaliyah (Wanna Be a VJ in San Francisco). Method Man (sitting at a merch table at the family values tour in 1999). I've met-ish a lot of fame-ish people. And I used to love Limp Bizkit and I have a rude and slutty cousin. Shut-up.

 

 

Sooooo, did any of you know that we were dealing with this totally awesome person known as our beloved Veebs on this forum?

 

I had no idea how cool you are.

 

BTW it was rude to ask Tera for a cigarette but I would almost definitely do the same thing

[Asteck 1250]

I caught wind of Lady Gaga being at my friend's work while I was helping out once. We tracked her down and took a picture with her. I've also shaken Bob Dole's good hand. These seem pretty comparable in terms of hot celebrity status. I didn't get a picture of him though

 

2. I don't feel comfortable bothering strangers enough to acknowledge that I recognize them, so I don't think I'd like to meet anymore celebrities. I told PFT I was a fan of his while he was checking out at a grocery store once and didn't realize that, because he was in the middle of a transaction, he couldn't leave. I just stared past him at the floor not knowing what else to say. It was very embarrassing for him.

 

3. Green ones that have been in the fridge for a little bit so they're really cold when I eat them. I don't know if that's a weird way to eat an apple or not. I play by my own rules, jerks.

[xoValeriexo 4369]

Burdrulz, I love your shirt designs. My [redacted] and I were laughing so hard while looking at them (particularly the Bai Ling one). Seriously, like choking laughing. But I also really would want one of each. I couldn't post about loving them before because it's too much for me. Like when I was younger and couldn't bring myself to watch any interviews with Daniel Radcliffe. It meant too much to me. I couldn't handle it.

 

And most of the celebri-people encounters I've had were when I was 12 or 13. And it was always some normal situation that anyone could be in if they just bought a ticket to a concert or something. Wait, ooh, I have another good one. I met Brody from The Distillers and she was so, so nice and cool. And when my friend and I had to leave (my parents were waiting in the car), she yelled "Bye Valerie and Rikki!" It was amazing.

 

And, uh, I have like 8 tattoos, so yeah... I'm pretty cool.

[robinsbruce 4985]

Tatoos are cool. I have some. NBD. It's really not a big deal you guys. Calm down people, geez.

[NotTheNarnold 413]

I have one tattoo, but it doesn't really count cause its on my upper arm and easily covered in the cold Pittsburgh weather.

[NotTheNarnold 413]

Also guys I just saw some article that Earwolf linked too called 50 funny people good things have happened to this year and I call bullshit. Where were our boys Hayes and Sean on that list? I think they deserve to be on more than 4 cast members of SNL.

[burdrulz 1760]

And, uh, I have like 8 tattoos, so yeah... I'm pretty cool.

 

Bruce Reid, and Narnold, and whomever else who is catching up on forum culture,

 

I too have tons of tattoos a lot of them are pretty hillarious and terrible in a good way?

 

not sure but maybe i'll know if I still think it's funny when I'm like 40 or something.

 

Anyway, what is the funniest tattoo you have? Why is it funny?

 

Please speak on this?

 

I can lead this to start. I have a ghost vomiting on my shoulder. When i was younger I wanted to do 'banksys' and i thought it would be cool if this was my 'tag'

 

I recognize and realize this is both stupid and stupid. But I don't care, it cracks me up.

[chanson 9697]

Tatoos are cool. I have some. NBD. It's really not a big deal you guys. Calm down people, geez.

 

No, they aren't. Yes, BD. bc forever unclean.

 

(I realize posting actual information about my life isn't necessarily 'funny' or probably not even 'cool' but for some reason I don't care)

 

Yes you do because you explained it.

 

I can lead this to start. I have a ghost vomiting on my shoulder. When i was younger I wanted to do 'banksys' and i thought it would be cool if this was my 'tag'

 

Younger you was wrong.

 

Also, Sean is Banksy, so maybe you should ask him how to be better at that. Clearly you need the help.

 

I recognize and realize this is both stupid and stupid. But I don't care, it cracks me up.

 

No you don't. And again, yes you do.

 

Burdrulz, I love your shirt designs. My [redacted] and I were laughing so hard while looking at them (particularly the Bai Ling one). Seriously, like choking laughing. But I also really would want one of each. I couldn't post about loving them before because it's too much for me. Like when I was younger and couldn't bring myself to watch any interviews with Daniel Radcliffe. It meant too much to me. I couldn't handle it.

 

And most of the celebri-people encounters I've had were when I was 12 or 13. And it was always some normal situation that anyone could be in if they just bought a ticket to a concert or something. Wait, ooh, I have another good one. I met Brody from The Distillers and she was so, so nice and cool. And when my friend and I had to leave (my parents were waiting in the car), she yelled "Bye Valerie and Rikki!" It was amazing.

 

And, uh, I have like 8 tattoos, so yeah... I'm pretty cool.

 

We know you have a boyfriend, Valerie Bryant. Jesus Christ!

 

I have one tattoo, but it doesn't really count cause its on my upper arm and easily covered in the cold Pittsburgh weather.

 

It counts. No excuses. You are scarred forever. Take responsibility for your actions, damnit.

 

-----------------------------------

 

I hope everyone enjoyed me being an asshole. Merry Christmas, nerds.

 

Love You, Bye.

[chanson 9697]

I don't have a tattoo because I'm not a Pacific Islander and it would be insensitive to steal their cultural traditions and rituals and then use them for the purpose of demonstrating to women that they should want me to have sex with them. They should, though. The women, I mean. I'm pretty awesome. I'm sure you've already noticed.

 

However, as Valerie Bryant knows, I do work out a lot, so I'm considering a big tribal tat. The only reason I haven't done it is because I'm afraid the Samoans at my gym would beat me up for misappropriating their culture and turning it into a symbol for douchiness. Apparently none of the white blue-collar twenty-somethings who work out too much at my gym are aware of such a potential conflict. Very nice people though, Samoans. Good cookies.

[xoValeriexo 4369]

All my tattoos are semi-funny in that I was a little too concerned with their meaning when I got them. The worst are song lyrics... two different places. One is "there's beauty in the breakdown" because I love Garden State. My mom said she'd buy me a tattoo if I took my septum piercing out before we went to see her family for the holidays. I picked that lyric because I felt it represented the time I spent in therapy to learn to accept having emotions rather than cutting myself to avoid feeling them. For real!

 

The other one says "I feel better when I sing", which is a lyric from a Bright Eyes song that I've only heard like 3 times. I just like singing and it does make me feel better. But it sounds like an "I'd rather be fishing" bumper sticker.

 

When I got my "xo" tattoos, I knew they'd make me look stupid which only made me want them more. So.. that makes those more funny than embarrassing to me.

 

I love the idea of a tattoo of a ghost vomiting. Can the forum get a photo? That you wanted it to be your tag is my favorite thing about it. Tell me, do you have any tattoos based on something that was once your DJ name?

 

Chanson, don't be jelly, it doesn't look good on you (jk yes it does).

[greggy 15909]

please tell me about the dreams youve been having lately, whackier the better b/c i like to laugh