Episode 36 — John Cochran, Our Close Friend

[robinsbruce 4985]

Sounds like your gym needs to hire someone to wipe down THOSE benches, amiriiiiiiiiight

 

25, no babies that I know of.

 

Thanks for being cool guys, I do like Wes Montgomery and I played an unreasonable amount of super nintendo games when I was a wee lad.

 

P.S. I shamelessly made a draft of Veebs script with some more direction and like two extra jokes. She said it was ok.

 

http://www.scribd.com/doc/229788194/Veebs-Spec-Script

 

Also, what do I have to do to get up in one of these Agata sketches? They sound whimsy.

[xoValeriexo 4369]

I once saw a lady shaving in the sauna at the gym.

 

And, as weird as it is to just set your vagina on a bench, it's also weird to see someone confidently bend over to put on their underwear while standing up. That view is not ideal. It's nice, but it's not ideal.

[greggy 15909]

in a perfect world you would have just finished toweling off, and a towel would make a good barrier between u and a bench

ETA: or even just your gross sweatpants if you are a real weirdo and want to change clothes without showering

[greggy 15909]

dont get me wrong tho, i would trade it all for the obliviousness necessary to go full batch-on-bench contact

[Joe McGurl 8358]

Your current pic is cool 'n all but I'm already missing your old one b/c it was the most evocative profile pic I've ever seen. I was all WUUUUUT when I saw it and then I felt really proud to be your FB friend-- really just a lot of mixed emotions going on, tbh, but I AM a woman after all so lol that's how that goes I s'pose.

 

Look guys, I had to throw up the current pic to honor my Dad and shit. I'll switch it back to the butt one later....I feel like I'm just a piece of meat to you people. A sexy sexy piece of meat.

[JacobCrites 4977]

Y'all I'm 22. Still young, but bummed I no longer qualify for the 15 under 15

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

Facebook.com/Jeff.Marra

Have fun, pals.

Also, JC, I'm 22 also, we should kiss or something.

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Facebook.com/Jeff.Marra

Have fun, pals.

Also, JC, I'm 22 also, we should kiss or something.

 

Welcome to the family. Don't betray us.

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

 

Welcome to the family. Don't betray us.

I'm going to try to have more funny status updates, because I desperately want you people to like me.

[chanson 9697]

 

Welcome to the family. Don't betray us.

 

Pot, meet kettle.

 

...told you I wouldn't forget.

[Freja 1290]

hey, thanks VB! that means a lot coming from a woman whose website i've stalked to a threat level capacity! and yeah, def had a weird childhood. things are good now, though! just rippin' up the HH forums daily and nightly but yeah overall have a healthy, fulfilling life! nothin' to worry bout here! haha! yeah!

 

BRR-- my gym is considered the "cleanest" one in my city. they just had to shut down the world gym down the road for a week in order to do an industrial deep clean b/c none of the bros clean the equipment there. learned this from a world gym refugee at my gym who hit on me while wearing his wedding ring

[chanson 9697]

 

 

But uhh yeah why the fuck was that guy at the urinal buck naked?! Is that how you guys pee in the men's room?? Lest you think women are all clean and pristine or w/e, fun anecdote time: a lot of women in the locker room at my gym just sit down on the benches COMPLETELY NAKED to put on their clothes. Like, no underwear or anything . They use the benches to rest on while they slip on their underwear.... which infuriates me b/c you're at the gym where you just worked out a ton but you're too weak to stand up to put your stupid clothes on? whyyy

 

 

I'm trying to find a way to criticize this but I'm not sure which wave of feminism critiques how women sit on benches in locker rooms naked. Please help!

 

Full disclosure: I need to know so that I can tell the guys at our next men's rights meeting (because apparently that's a thing).

[kobthatreal 5896]

In the next episode I hope Hayes and Sean talk about the difference between being a Dad and being a Father. Anyone can be a Dad, you just gotta have good sperm, but not everyone can be a father. And also, it's easy to be a Father, but it's a lot harder to be a Daddy, that's who's really there for the kids. And in case you didn't know, it's not that hard to be a Daddy, but it takes a real man to be a Papa. But the realest men are Papa Dearests, whom the Papa's envy. But The Mama's and The Papa Dearests must've been California Dreamin when they heard of the Dada's... Cause anyone can be a papa mama dearest, but a real man, a man who is there for his kids... thassa Dada.

[greggy 15909]

my fave line from bill and ted

[greggy 15909]

the idea seems very deep on the surface but if you think about it trying to actually implement and enforce a parenthood licensing system would be terrible, i for one stand firm against senator reeves' measure

[kobthatreal 5896]

the idea seems very deep on the surface but if you think about it trying to actually implement and enforce a parenthood licensing system would be terrible, i for one stand firm against senator reeves' measure

 

agreed greggy. slippery slope. next thing there will be a license for eating ice cream.... uhhh... no thanks!

 

#KeaNO

[chanson 9697]

 

agreed greggy. slippery slope. next thing there will be a license for eating ice cream.... uhhh... no thanks!

 

#KeaNO

 

Yeah, thanks but no thanks, Obama.

 

#Nobama

#Freedomaintfree

#MensRights (for Freja)

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

#2manyhashtags

[greggy 15909]

hashtags are inherently funny, im lmbo over here

[robinsbruce 4985]

hashtags are inherently funny, im lmbo over here

 

your wbo?

[greggy 15909]

cheek2cheek

[JacobCrites 4977]

Facebook.com/Jeff.Marra

Have fun, pals.

Also, JC, I'm 22 also, we should kiss or something.

#bdaybros

Not to be confused with #bidetbros

[Andrew 4646]

Guys, what's your least favourite name? Mine is "Oliver".

 

(Just stirring up some debate, we're not even at Post Two-Hundo yet.)

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

Guys, what's your least favourite name? Mine is "Oliver".

 

(Just stirring up some debate, we're not even at Post Two-Hundo yet.)

Jimmy Pardo will probably kill you. Or just say "Ha! You're an idiot!"

[Bozos of Basketball 3689]

Jimmy Pardo will probably kill you. Or just say "Ha! You're an idiot!"

 

That is definitely not not funny. And I don't see how it could ever, EVER be considered otherwise.