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tehjeff

Thir13en Ghosts (2001)

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Yes, that is the actual, legitimate spelling of the title of this movie. Not 13 Ghosts, that was the title of the 1960s original. Thir13en Ghosts. It literally takes me 3 additional seconds to type that out that should be necessary because my brain is rejecting the concept.

 

This movie is in-sane.

 

Admittedly I loved it when it came out because I never really liked watching horror movies after my Dad scarred me for life as a child. So when 13 Ghosts...I mean, Thir13en Ghosts came out I felt so proud of myself for being able to sit through it in the theater, I had truly advanced to manhood!

 

But in reality I was able to sit through it because it is 15% horror and 100% bonkers, which gives us a grand total of 115% -- a mathematically unfeasible occurrence, but that is how totally ridiculous this movie is.

 

It stars Tony Shalhoub, Matthew Lillard, Shannon Elizabeth (who gives one of the most unintentionally hilarious performances in Hollywood history), and a bunch of ghosts. The dialogue is non-stop hilarious, but the movie moves along at this quick pace that makes it oh-so-watchable.

 

Some tidbits:

 

1) Matthew Lillard is a psychic who helps a crazed old man capture ghosts

 

2) Tony Shalhoub is a widowed father of two children who struggle with their bills and finances but somehow manage to employ an African-American nanny who stands as an example of how racism moves from the hands of white script writers to paper, and then on to the silver screen

 

3) Shannon Elizabeth has a smile that looks painful, and all she does is make Joker-esque faces at everything around her

 

4) SPELLS!

 

5) A gigantic, mechanical glass house

 

6) Razer scooters and a death-obsessed 8-year-old

 

Give me another reason to watch this movie again.

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I own this movie and still can't get over the fact that Shaloub is meant to be the hero in this when up to that point he always played second fiddle to the star and was comedic relief.

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I can't get over the fact that he is meant to be the hero of this movie when his character is an asshole for 80% of the running time. If he isn't losing his temper and yelling at his kids he is beating the shit out of Matthew Lillard in a giant glass house. I don't think I could work up enough interest in his plight to feel any sort of empathy regarding his family situation due to his extreme fits of rage/condescension/self-loathing.

 

This was a rare movie where I legitimately did not care if every character died. If it had turned out to be one of those movies where it's a giant disaster in the final minutes and everyone bites it I would be 100% okay with it.

 

Especially the kid.

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Has there been a movie that came after Se7en, that used numbers in place of letters that has been good?

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Has there been a movie that came after Se7en, that used numbers in place of letters that has been good?

 

N0p3

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Has there been a movie that came after Se7en, that used numbers in place of letters that has been good?

Even "Seven" didn't originally use it in the title though, as the original poster had it spelled out gimmick-free. I haven't watched it in a while, so I can't remember, but was "Se7en" maybe something they did in the credits?

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Oh, and I think the most MYSTERIOUS number-in-title title is "Step Up 2 The Streets". I mean, is it supposed to be "Step Up 2" with "The Streets" as the subtitle, or is it saying "Step Up TO the Streets"? I guess we were never meant to know...

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Yeah this movie was insane. It wasnt even scary just stupid. I always thought Tony Shalhoub was a good actor but his character is really unlikable. 

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