Masterminds (1997)

[VajayjayLeno 336]

The year is 1997. Patrick Stewart is no longer Captain Picard, but not yet Professor Xavier. Vincent Kartheiser is some nobody kid who isn't even on Angel yet, let alone Mad Men. Together, they make a horrible movie that I only know because I found a 25 cent VHS in a small town supermarket while they were trying to clear out their stock of unsellable shit.

 

Here's a synopsis from IMDb: Oz, a rebellious teenager who just got expelled from his preppy school returns for one final prank. But as he goes to the basement to set things up, he stumbles upon a security consultant, former school employee, that just took the entire school hostage for millions in ransom. Oz must rely on his youth and love for pranks to outwit the devious criminal mastermind.

 

Yeah. It's that good.

[sillstaw 414]

From the director of "Battlefield Earth!"

[Ofcoursemyhorse 1043]

The first scene where they try to introduce the kid as a hacker is fucking nuts.

[seanotron 2307]

Patrick Stewart can do no wrong, yet this movie IS terrible. I think the only way to resolve this moment of cognitive dissonance is to declare this movie non-canonical.

[jarrycanada 2483]

Seanotron I was going to say the same thing, that you can't go wrong with Patrick Stewart.

 

if any of you guys haven't seen Patrick Stewart in extras then try and find it.it's well worth your time.

 

wouldn't it be mind blowing if they got Patrick Stewart to guest star on the show. I wish they would get more guest stars on the show to talk about there own work.in Patrick Stewart's case art!

[ShannEffect 18]

This movie is amazing, I enjoyed the love triangle between Patrick Stewart, Brenda Fricker, and Vincent Kartheiser.

[Lando 2019]

Patrick Stewart can do no wrong, yet this movie IS terrible. I think the only way to resolve this moment of cognitive dissonance is to declare this movie non-canonical.

 

How do you treat Jeffrey?

[Big McLargehuge 31]

I almost thought this thread was for this movie and I got concerned.

 

[media='']http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xzk7ohprYrs[/media]

 

This movie is mostly dog shit, but the last twenty minutes or so (which includes an extended gun battle in which people hide behind a salad bar sneeze guard) is totally awesome. No glass is harmed in the making of this film. All glass shattered effects are done digitally, meaning that when the camera shakes the broken glass graphics float around in front of the glass that's supposed to have bullet holes in it. Also, Tila Tequila is a wonderful actress. Not suggesting this one for the show, but just in case you happen upon it streaming anywhere, you're better off skipping to act III.

 

Anyway, you guys and gals go back to talking about your other Masterminds film. It sounds fun.

[Ofcoursemyhorse 1043]

So can anyone explain the opening scene to me? Is that video game supposed to be some kind of anti piracy test? and for what? I feel like they almost couldnt do this movie just because that scene is so fucking confusing it would inevitably take up the bulk of the episode to unravel.

[RyanSz 3140]

This movie I kept getting mixed up with Toy Soldiers as both concern schools that are taken hostage, but then I would at times get Toy Soldiers mixed up with Small Soldiers as the latter concerns action figures that are soldiers coming to life. I'm still wondering how they were able to name drop Scream 2 as they were two different studios. Also this movie has yet to be released on anything other than VHS, which is amazing considering that such shitty films like Robocop 3 and Snitch are getting Blu Ray and 4K releases.