Episode 115 — Improving Brett's House with DC Pierson

[Rose_Cream 1246]

Is exploding toilets with my mind good or bad? I also don't like the chanson comment btw.

[apocowarg 2696]

Is exploding toilets with my mind good or bad? I also don't like the chanson comment btw.

 

fixt

 

I don't really know all you peeps as I am pretty new around here and I didn't lurk much on old episodes. I just felt like writing something stupid for fun. If I said anything offensive or got genders wrong, I apologize. Happy to change, remove or delete the entire thing as needed.

[souprman 10477]

JK seriously

[Jack Johnson P.I. 3649]

Happy to change, remove or delete the entire thing as needed.

 

I'm pretty freakin cheesed at what you said about me. First of all, It's not a "hollowed out rock". It's a finely cut, buffed, and automated GIANT DIAMOND RV. Jesus, you make me sound like some crazy conspiracy loon. Secondly, I moved out from under the Pentagon September 10th 2001, right before Cheney sent that missile in to try and take me down.

[Joe Lerini 7329]

For a good time call 867-5309.

[souprman 10477]

Leniri I got your numbah!

[Joe Lerini 7329]

Leniri I got your numbah!

Paul Scheer, is that you?

 

EDIT: For those that don't listen to HDTGM mini-sodes, Paul butchered my last name during Corrections and Omissions.

[lizzy 1946]

Listening to the Brandon Content episode, and "It's hard to tell when it's me and when it's Douglas now, 'cause we're getting connected" is one of the strangest and best sentences.

 

Oh hey SteveH how about a baby named Douglas?

[rod aug 5637]

raccoons are widely known as great pets with human hands at least that's what reddit tries to tell me, and afaik reddit has never been wrong.

[Blink 1844]

Like, all you dudes wouldn't mind getting pegged at some point, right?

[apocowarg 2696]

These threads are getting too wacky

[JacobCrites 4977]

 

Jacob C - actually immortal, spends more time at children's hospitals than you do on the shitter

 

Idk if I've been more open on these forums than I remember or I know you in real life, or you're a creep, but that is weirdly accurate.

[robotam 4493]

I fixed your list

heres a pretty good list

 

nohorseman - this is a man that is so strong your grandpa would shit his pants if he knew

piemanpie24 - i like the cut of his jib, a true patriot and fuckmachine

ThunderCock69 - might like 311 i don't remember TREAD LIGHTLY (oh nvm doesn't like 311 pcool guy)

chickn egg(nog) - real sexy piece of business this one

--- - pearly allure of mysteriousness

honlads - sounds like something a viking would yell at the dumb sea

aaaaa - she makes the Queen of Sheba look like a wet piece of shit

youngrose - ever seen that movie where the cool new kid comes to school and changes everything? bottle that

silvrwoman - people pay this lady to fuck their moms and she accepts bitcoins

Spunky Foonerism - this dude wears bear traps instead of shoes

Joe Lerini - got into a fight with giant crab and the crab was crying

mikebonetti - uses a 55 gallon hefty bag as a condom FOR HIS BRAIN

wargen - dutch irish you prick

ashley - played a game of chess against the grim reaper and guess who won? well do you see the grim reaper anywhere? no

Rose_Cream - made a toilet explode with their mind (this is good the toilet was evil)

lizzy - Josh Homme has her on speed dial

Jacob C - actually immortal, spends more time at children's hospitals than you do on the shitter

JeffreyPartiesStrikesBack - lifted a volkswagon with his dick

SteveH - can eat batteries but doesn't cuz he is so modest, also has real fertile loins

Jackal - strong german name

Number 1 Cheeba Hawk - jumped over a waffle house and slam dunked a basketball

Jack Johnson P.I. - lives in a hollowed out rock underneath the pentagon

Houston - same name as the best porn star but don't google recent pictures of that porn star it went downhill

WheedzCentricThEntertainer - smokes blunts made out of bible pages but in a respectful manner

Nice Norm - sassy enough to strip the bark off a mighty oak

Joe McGurl - curly mustache circus strongman extraordinaire

Chanson - friend of the turtles, master of icy reaches

Ensendada Slime - hacked all the way into north korea's wireless network

eLIZamuffins - can crush walnuts with her thighs and crushes hearts with bedroom eyes

greggy - i think this is the clown from that movie about krumping

Ronnie hog - what can you say about ronnie hog that hasn't already been said about raccoons as a species

Kevin O'Brien - raps no good, smells like old taco lives under dumpster

Blink - tales tell of a mountain that fell in love with a man

agata - timebeast

Jon Onyx - said a riddle that made smoke come out of a robot's head

Cargo Shortzenegger - walked across the bottom of the atlantic ocean to prove a point

dreamingofhalls - makes sonic the hedgehog look like a poser

thejjar - did some pretty not-okay stuff to a bunch of people that deserved it

RanRan - is legally dead but told god to "eat farts"

Asadasa - above average fencer

mwn - accomplishments are classfied and you ain't got the clearance, buddy

A Bear - wrote Saving Private Ryan, is a bear

devscoot - rhymes with crash bandicoot, not a coincidence

Zsinjeh - first person to receive a mermaid heart transplant

Thomas Fiddlesticks - has two blue ribbons from the county fair one for making pies and one for being fucking awesome

Bruce Reid Robinson II - married his dog in defiance of the both the heavens and all actual human law

Danny Boy Wizard - tender soul, high and tight perm, cheetah on the future streets

Andrew - hits the skins like a madman takes no guff from nobody specially not his dad

robotam - reclusive musician whose debut album The Low Tabernackle is considered a modern folk rock masterpiece. Pitchfork's review consisted of a 34 second audio clip of their entire Chicago office spitting on a copy of Radiohead's Kid A

 

 

 

I LOVE YOU!

 

That's a great list!

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

raccoons are widely known as great pets with human hands at least that's what reddit tries to tell me, and afaik reddit has never been wrong.

Yeah, there's a little thing called the book Rascal, by Sterling North, you should look it up some time, dummies! Raccoons are the number one pet.

 

I have a raccoon skull, want to see it?

[rod aug 5637]

Yes yes I thought you'd never ask!!

[nohorseman 5423]

Show us the skull, please, SpunkFoo

[Jakal 4475]

I don't believe Mr Foonerism.

[Silvrwoman 4998]

He's probably just gonna show us a photo of a different animal's skull, like a human or something, 'cause he thinks we're too stupid to know the difference. Very offended Spunky; we may be stupid but we know how to google image search!

[Houston 4819]

Wargen,

 

Your list is pretty messed up. Super offensive. If you'd read the archives you'd know that I am not a porn star and am actually severely allergic to them. However, I am a Nephilim so I'd appreciate some respect and your list further amended to reflect my divine origin.

[Houston 4819]

He's probably just gonna show us a photo of a different animal's skull, like a human or something, 'cause he thinks we're too stupid to know the difference. Very offended Spunky; we may be stupid but we know how to google image search!

 

Careful silvr, Spunky is the know to be the Robert Durst of the rodent world. Don't underestimate the literal skeletons in his closet.

 

edit: closet. kitchen table. piercings. jewelry. voodoo supply chest.

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

 

It still needs some work to clean it up and put the teeth back in. I wasn't able to find the big top fangs when I found this skull, unfortunately.

[nohorseman 5423]

Is... is that a ... silver standing liberty quarter!? Nice find at your local numismatist, what a keen shopping eye you have

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

Oh that old thing? Just something I found in my yard while I was digging up weeds. No big deal.

[Houston 4819]

 

It still needs some work to clean it up and put the teeth back in. I wasn't able to find the big top fangs when I found this skull, unfortunately.

 

good news bad news mark.

 

Good news, that coin isn't the only rare find you have in your house.

 

Bad news, you got yourself a chupacabra. I had the ladies in the lab do some renderings.

 

[Jakal 4475]

 

It still needs some work to clean it up and put the teeth back in. I wasn't able to find the big top fangs when I found this skull, unfortunately.

Still don't believe you, I'm going to need to see that skulls long form birth certificate.