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JulyDiaz

Episode 132 - Bloodsport: LIVE!

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Remember the good ol' days when HDTGM was done both in-studio and live and WC? wasn't just a billboard for Bajillion Dollar Propertie$? Ah, memories...

 

... that being said, this was a great episode and much like Hot Saucerman returns for all Sharknados and Adam Quordero shows up for the Fast & Furiouses, Nicole Byer should most definitely be the resident JCVD special guest.

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I finally figured it out the mystery of the Briefs Pull-up moment after watching it more times than I should've at work:

 

The pulling up the briefs is an editor's mistake. JVCD kept his briefs just covering his asscheeks before the take started, but is waiting for the director to call "Action" so he can pop them under his asscheeks to simulate the full roll-up. JCVD, the consummate professional that he is, is trying to give the editor enough coverage, who then proceeds to drop the ball with a poor cut.

 

Omission/Fun Fact: JCVD is an uncredited editor on this one.

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I finally figured it out the mystery of the Briefs Pull-up moment after watching it more times than I should've at work:

 

The pulling up the briefs is an editor's mistake. JVCD kept his briefs just covering his asscheeks before the take started, but is waiting for the director to call "Action" so he can pop them under his asscheeks to simulate the full roll-up. JCVD, the consummate professional that he is, is trying to give the editor enough coverage, who then proceeds to drop the ball with a poor cut.

 

Omission/Fun Fact: JCVD is an uncredited editor on this one.

 

Makes sense, because if you watch the part where Ray Jackson says "No shit you honour his invitation", it's clear that he's just waiting for an "Action", but he's done it more than one, it's like "We honour your invitation" - Cut to Jackson - wait - "No shit your honour his invitation"

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Omission

 

Frank Dux is so full of shit his eyes are brown. Literally where he says the Kumite took place was the address of his house, unless he was being investigated by the CIA for holding illegal death sports inside of his living room. Also as for the guy with the monkey fighting style, there is a fighting style variant of drunken fighting where the fighter moves similar to a monkey. There was an old show on MTV called Final Fu where one of the participants tried using the style in his match, but only ended up looking like a jackass.

 

As for the ref in the fight, I think he was sort of like early UFC refs, where they were there only to call an end to the fight once a fighter had given up. So I'm actually surprised Jackson didn't bring in a beer can during his match to crack over someone's head since it would have been completely legal. As for Jackson trying to start a chant of his own name it just reminded me of the old SNL skit where Jeff Goldblum starts the wave at a baseball game and then spends the rest of the bit trying to get credit for it being so awesome.

 

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/wave-starter/n10466

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So far Nicole Byer is the best guest ever and I want her and Jason to have their own spin-off podcast where they just talk about parts of movies that turned them on lol.

 

 

I've been bouncing around an idea for a podcast/youtube show where people are interviewed while playing "Cards Against humanity" (And other similar games) called "Oh the Humanity" (Or something.) and after listening to the both of them in this episode, I'd want them as Co-hosts.

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At one point in my life I used to have Joust on one of those "Plug & Play" pieces of garbage you buy at the mall for $5 that had a thousand other games on it too.

 

The sweet thing about the PlayStation 2 version (and to some extent, its contemporary on the original Xbox) is that it's among a bunch of arcade game compilations released by various classic arcade publishers that were never re-released on later generations of consoles. The PS2 was late enough to have developed the ability to run the full-fledged versions of the games, but early enough that many of the golden age arcade companies were still around. So while dedicated units have some of the same games, it's easier to have one console and a bunch of discs than an assortment of cheap specialized hardware. As USgamer puts it: "The Best Arcade Machine is a PlayStation 2".

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With regard to the puzzlement about how Helmer and Rawlins are generally dimwitted "but yet they always seem to get to where they need to go": isn't that pretty typical for stupid fictional characters, who may be inept in whatever situation they're in at the time, but manage to move the plot along over the course of the story for dramatic necessity? Even Dumb and Dumber themselves made it to Aspen.

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Long and short of [bloodsport 2] is:

Daniel Bernardt plays street thief, Alex Cardo, who steals an ancient sword from wealthy businessman David Leung (played by Pat Morita) and is sent to prison after his partners betray him. Whilst in prison, he meets Master Sun (played by James Hong). Leung finds out that his sword is being awarded to the winner of the Kumite, and he sends Alex and Master Sun to fight in the Kumite to retrieve it, however, he has to fight "Demon", who was actually the most brutal prison guard where he was incarcerated.

 

That plot seemed vaguely familiar, then I realized that the New York Times TV listings used to run this unforgettable blurb when it was on: “A street fighter uses a martial art he learned in prison to recover an ancient ceremonial sword from a wealthy businessman.” (I last read it back in the '90s, but I recalled the "a street fighter uses a martial art he learned in prison" part word for word.)

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Remember the good ol' days when HDTGM was done both in-studio and live and WC? wasn't just a billboard for Bajillion Dollar Propertie$? Ah, memories...

 

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the flashback in this movie was ridiculously long ... i have it at over 11 and a half minutes ... and thru the whole thing JCVD is in some sort of trance ... so it got me thinking ... what if you walked into the room as he was in the trance

"hey JC?

JC?

Oh great ... you're remembering again"

 

so i made a video ... this is what i imagine it would be like if you were in the room with him

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkncQnTbOmI

 

In fact, why was the opening flashback a flashback at all? In such a straightforward plot, why not merely show the earlier scenes and then the main storyline, in chronological order?

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Sorry to pile on to Sheldon (the writer of the film), but I really would love clarification on who Frank Ducks is fighting for? Is it...

1) His own personal honor of being the champion?

2) For the Tanaka Name/Clan?

3) Avenging the death of Shingo Tanaka (the master's son)?

4) Avenging the minor cut on Ray Jackson's head?

 

Argh!!!!

 

I really like how Bloodsport avoids giving the protagonist an unnecessarily elaborate motivation. Watching it for the first time, I kept expecting one of the cliche motivations usually found in the genre to turn up, but it never happened, and it was a refreshing change of pace to have a hero in the action genre who enters a competition for the same reason as in sports movies: simply to win.

 

#3 and #4 don't quite fit the usual trope of avenging a mentor/friend/family member as the major impetus. Shingo's death is acknowledged but not invoked heavy-handedly as a motivator (like

). Ray Jackson's injuries are after Dux is well into the tournament, and they avoid being used to make him the sort of movie best buddy (usually named

Goose

) whose demise midway provides a boost to motivation. The villains are nasty without having a grand Bond villain scheme behind the tournament (like, well, Han in Enter the Dragon), and Dux isn't a messianic, destined chosen one but merely top-notch in his field. And that Dux doesn't "get the girl" shows that romance isn't needed as a motivation either.

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Remember the good ol' days when HDTGM was done both in-studio and live and WC? wasn't just a billboard for Bajillion Dollar Propertie$? Ah, memories...

 

... that being said, this was a great episode and much like Hot Saucerman returns for all Sharknados and Adam Quordero shows up for the Fast & Furiouses, Nicole Byer should most definitely be the resident JCVD special guest.

What's WC?

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Jason touched on it briefly, but Ray Jackson certainly feels like he was introduced as a villain. The two are never really seen bonding outside of video game sparring, but that was enough to rank up to BFFs. So much so that Jackson has full access to JCVD's room, where he can come in as he pleases and even stand on his bed. I thought Jackson was for sure going to get killed, and JCVD's reaction to his match seemed to reinforce that (again, a deep reaction for this perfect stranger). All of this could be brushed aside if not for the fact that he tells him that he loves him. "Anytime, anyplace, anywhere, if you ever need me, I'll be there." that I get, but "I love you, my friend"??? You just met this dude! It almost feels like there was a missing character that fused with Jackson. Like, what if Tanaka's son wasn't dead and traveled along to the Kumite (maybe even finding his fate at the hands of Chong-Li)? Or even just an established longtime friend when he arrives. The sappiness would make sense when applied to an actual "brother" figure.

 

Maybe they were intentionally making Ray Jackson seem like a bad guy so that it be even more badass when he turns out to be on the side of good after all? Like

Madmartigan in Willow.

 

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as for the guy with the monkey fighting style, there is a fighting style variant of drunken fighting where the fighter moves similar to a monkey.

 

Exactly why it's used by Monkey in the Kung Fu Panda movies. And it's no coincidence that a drunken fighting style is voiced by the Drunken Master himself.

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I've been bouncing around an idea for a podcast/youtube show where people are interviewed while playing "Cards Against humanity" (And other similar games) called "Oh the Humanity" (Or something.)

 

Or it could simply be a podcast about bad movies. One of the very first bad movie websites was literally called "Oh, the Humanity!"

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Or it could simply be a podcast about bad movies. One of the very first bad movie websites was literally called "Oh, the Humanity!"

 

 

So? Same name different subject matter. It would be stealing otherwise.

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So, is this the best movie Cannon made? Its straightforward charm definitely holds up better than any of their attempts to make more elaborate movies on higher budgets, as exemplified by previous HDTGM subject Masters of the Universe. (The Electric Boogaloo documentary quotes Golan or Globus that on their $20 million movies, they would rather be using it for 20 different $1 million movies.) And it's safe to say that it's better than almost all of their forays into prestige filmmaking. But do their rare acclaimed efforts like Runaway Train (which was nominated at the Academy Awards) or The Assault (which won; I'm not kidding) provide exceptions?

 

Is the real question "how did a movie this good get made at Cannon?"

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Found this gem by one Andrew Wright on Amazon.com, it's an editorial review that for some reason only appears on the page for the VHS edition of the movie:

A well-oiled Jean-Claude Van Damme makes his starring debut in what may be one of the few kickboxing films to be based on a true story. The Muscles from Brussels plays Frank Dux, the first Westerner ever to win the extreme "whupfest" known as the Kumatai (a long-running, no-holds-barred fighting tournament in Hong Kong). While a bit deficient in the script department (to say the least), this undeniably exciting flick succeeds by letting Van Damme play to his strengths: namely, minimal acting and a lot of impossibly acrobatic splits while kicking people in the head. A guilty-pleasure testosterone blast of the highest order, with a memorable villain (the massive Bolo Yeung from Enter the Dragon), and a multitude of well-choreographed fight scenes. An embarrassed-looking Forest Whitaker cameos as a hapless (and non-kickboxing) cop.

Ironic that it's harsher on the movie that HDTGM.

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Might the way Dux is simultaneously American and with a conspicuously non-American accent be implicitly meant to intentionally represent America? As Roger Ebert noted in his review of National Treasure:

 

Diane Kruger has a foreign accent even though she is the National Archivist, so that our eyes can mist at the thought that in the land of opportunity, even a person with a foreign accent can become the National Archivist.

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I don't get the crankiness about live episodes. Yes, it's a bummer not being able to see everything, but somebody generally posts a picture or video. But I find myself looking forward to live shows more now because, as performers, the hosts & guests are even better in front of an audience!

 

That being said, I'd be stupid happy if they recorded the live shows on video like Gilmore Guys.

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So, is this the best movie Cannon made? Its straightforward charm definitely holds up better than any of their attempts to make more elaborate movies on higher budgets, as exemplified by previous HDTGM subject Masters of the Universe. (The Electric Boogaloo documentary quotes Golan or Globus that on their $20 million movies, they would rather be using it for 20 different $1 million movies.) And it's safe to say that it's better than almost all of their forays into prestige filmmaking. But do their rare acclaimed efforts like Runaway Train (which was nominated at the Academy Awards) or The Assault (which won; I'm not kidding) provide exceptions?

 

Is the real question "how did a movie this good get made at Cannon?"

It looks like a case of "even a broken watch is right twice a day" for Cannon in regards to this film and others like Cobra or Breakin' which did really well at the box office. Though with the award winners nominees, at least in the case of The Assault it seems like they did what WWE Studios does now by buying into a nearly completed movie with established actors already attached, like what they did with Dead Man Falling or Oculus. They seem to have had a better run doing this than their completely created films, Oculus in particular is a good horror movie, and from looking at The Assault, it seems like they maybe just joined on the production in order to help get a wider release for the film, as Cannon only really has a distribution credit on the film.

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