The House of The Dead

[jkyle 1]

I'm sorry, but this is the worst movie ever and it has been proven by science. In fact, it's so bad that it comes full circle. I hate it so much that I actually love it. The fun is in how inept it actually is. All the lead actresses get naked within minutes of each other in a totally gratuitous way, and seeing Jurgen Prochnow slumming it is simply too much to bear. The plot makes no sense, the acting is terrible, and it has nothing to do with the videogame that it is based on... except for the horrible spliced-in shots of out of date 90s arcade graphics, along with a spin-around camera when someone gets killed. This is the worst movie that I actually like, but I like it for all the wrong reasons.

[Somethingdumb 1]

I'm sure Uwe Boll movies have been thrown out in the past, but his movies can be a dangerous choice. Often, they're so bad that they become unenjoyable. House of the Dead isn't his worst movie, but it is his most fun. From horror chase scenes that blast generic 90s club rock to random and frequent 1/2 second clips from the video game, this movie is truly a feat. Videogame movies are a huge well to tap for bad films and there's no better place to start than House of the Dead.
Sadly, I DO know how the movie was made. Uwe Boll is German, and uses a tax loophole in the German government that sponsors the arts. But maybe knowing that this money was funded by the national treasury of Germany will be comforting when you hear the narrator repeat lines just said by the actors.

[Somethingdumb 1]

Oh, also, flashbacks not just to the previous scene, but to a scene currently in progress.

[Kung-Fu Ramone 3]

I think a whole podcast could be done just on the presence of Clint Howard and Jürgen Prochnow in this Uwe Boll classic.

[Somethingdumb 1]

Muerte. That's Spanish for DEATH.

[Johnny Unusual 525]

I think there's a lot of people who wouldn't want to see this reviewed simply because Uwe Boll feeds on ANY kind of attention, but me and my friends were able to get a lot of mileage out of making fun of this one in the theatre. It is a pretty insane movie with stuff like zombies jumping out with jazz hands as if they were in a local haunted house on Halloween or a woman jumping with a camera spinning around her Matrix style as she FIRES A SHOTGUN. I second this!

[jimkiler 84]

This movie is so bad even the topless women at the beginning are not attractive. This is the first and last Uwe Boll movie i have seen.

[ChelseaPascale 0]

You must check out House Of The Dead...based off an arcade game. It was made in 2003 by Uwe Boll. It's low budget and hilariously awful.

[seanotron 2307]

It was made in 2003 by Uwe Boll.

 

Paul instituted an Uwe Boll ban after A Dungeon Siege Tale

 

[JoeSchiffenhaus 1]

Jurgen Prochnow as a brave sea captain of a boat roughly half the size of the Orca! Clint Howard as his trusty first mate clad in fisherman gordon style yellow hat and slicker, who reminds us of how Smee would talk if he was from the 1920's... and retarded! Asian girls who were American flag dresses AND are also named Liberty! People with no firearm training, instantly developing the skills of cocking, reloading, and hip firing machine guns! A girl who fleetingly mentions she took the one-handed-tiny-poking sword art of fencing in school, and turns that into the strength and skill required to wield a greatsword with the grace of William Wallace. All set against the backdrop of a EDM festival on a tiny Pine Tree infested island located in the random and vacant Pacific Northwest... Brought to you by Sega Game Systems.

 

[Sievers 233]

It's a truly terrible movie, I actually forgot Clint Howard was in this!

 

I saw it when it first came out so I didn't really have an idea of what to expect. I got mad with how bad it was, not even fun bad. All I remember of it was that you could see the automated launch pads used to flip stunt people clearly in one of the scenes.

 

Didn't watch another Uwe Boll movie again and remained baffled everytime a studio gave him money.

 

Listening to the 'In the Name of the King' episode the other day Paul says something along the line of them getting a sense of what Uwe Boll is about and doesn't feel the need to do one again.

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

Is there not a thread for this already? I certainly remember talking about it somewhere, but maybe it was in a different movie's thread...