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nrkist

New Foam

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So, everyone says that you should punch a shark in the face, if you are ever in that situation...but punching anybody in the face is the resolution to that situtation.

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what did Mr. Davis' canine service animal say?

 

I can see for Miles

 

 

st. vincent moan-sigh quality

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what did Mr. Davis' canine service animal say?

 

I can see for Miles

 

That's a concerning joke that you would find on the inside of a bubblegum wrapper. It would motivate you to write a scathing letter to the Bazooka Joe Company. By the way...no bazooka's. Neither rocket launchers nor boobs. Basically, we gotta take down Bazooka Joe and it's deceitful business practices.

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Cats are always purring and rubbing up against things, but once you get them all in a bag and toss 'em in a lake, they pretty much don't do anything....

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I'm opening a new store that caters to Wiccans with allergies it's called Sneezin' of the Witch.

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My band, Wickett and the Yub Yubs, would love to do the music for your commercial. It's my ewok-themed metal band...Nicholas Cage is somehow involved.

 

We found some success with Wickett's Wicann Wild World of Yub Yub. There's a lot of confusing audience crossover even admiting a really weak passing sound similarity.

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I used to think I was Pansexual, until I realized I'm only attracted to the goat half.

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I used to think I was Pansexual, until I realized I just wasn't that into skillets.

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I used to think I was Pansexual, until I realized I could jerk off as easily to more favourable reviews.

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In a grocery store, the clerk always asks you, "Paper or Plastic?"

 

I always tell them to really mix it up and surprise me.

 

Edit: That foam brought to you direct from 1982.

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If you ever run across a depressed committee of Xbox specialists, it would be a perfect opportunity to console the console council.

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You know who I bet wishes they got an Amber Alert? All those mosquitoes drinking dinosaur blood!

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You know who I bet wishes they got an Amber Alert? All those mosquitoes drinking dinosaur blood!

LOL, no...explain. The amber alerts are for the mosquitoes? Why would we want that? I actually don't want to much investigate further here, despite how funny it is.

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So, everyone says that you should punch a shark in the face, if you are ever in that situation...but punching anybody in the face is the resolution to that situtation.

 

Like...in this situation...was anyone really thinking, "Maybe I should really work this shark's body. Kinda pile away at that for a bit and wear this shark down for the KO". NO! You just punch the thing available to you which happens to be it's FACE and NOSE which is immediately available to you BECAUSE IT'S EATING YOU. You know whats highly effective in any man-man/man-animal fight?

 

Punching something directly in the nose.

 

Go try it out on your pets, and you will see what I'm saying.

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So they call it 'First Class Mail', but it should be called 'Probably Never Going to Get There Mail'. It's called 'First Class', but of all classifications of mail, it's infact 'Worst Class'.

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Yeah, like...don't punch a star fish in the face...cause you're actually punching it in the penis...?

 

Look, I dunno how this works, but I am definitely behind a soft coast of star-fish punching.

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. I think something happened, and people became very worked up, regarding which animal deserved a nut checking the most. It was quite shameful all round, and unfunnny. That's why this weird space is here...

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some of the hardest animals to fight don't have a nose bro

 

The dumb ones...brah...

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