New Foam

[nrkist 71]

So, everyone says that you should punch a shark in the face, if you are ever in that situation...but punching anybody in the face is the resolution to that situtation.

[orphan yachts 217]

what did Mr. Davis' canine service animal say?

 

I can see for Miles

[HipGuide 196]

what did Mr. Davis' canine service animal say?

 

I can see for Miles

 

 

st. vincent moan-sigh quality

[nrkist 71]

what did Mr. Davis' canine service animal say?

 

I can see for Miles

 

That's a concerning joke that you would find on the inside of a bubblegum wrapper. It would motivate you to write a scathing letter to the Bazooka Joe Company. By the way...no bazooka's. Neither rocket launchers nor boobs. Basically, we gotta take down Bazooka Joe and it's deceitful business practices.

[nrkist 71]

Cats are always purring and rubbing up against things, but once you get them all in a bag and toss 'em in a lake, they pretty much don't do anything....

[denimgremlin 1179]

I'm opening a new store that caters to Wiccans with allergies it's called Sneezin' of the Witch.

[nrkist 71]

My band, Wickett and the Yub Yubs, would love to do the music for your commercial. It's my ewok-themed metal band...Nicholas Cage is somehow involved.

 

We found some success with Wickett's Wicann Wild World of Yub Yub. There's a lot of confusing audience crossover even admiting a really weak passing sound similarity.

[DanEngler 5249]

I used to think I was Pansexual, until I realized I'm only attracted to the goat half.

[nrkist 71]

I used to think I was Pansexual, until I realized I just wasn't that into skillets.

[JuhoGrubert 5]

I used to think I was Pansexual, until I realized I could jerk off as easily to more favourable reviews.

[nrkist 71]

In a grocery store, the clerk always asks you, "Paper or Plastic?"

 

I always tell them to really mix it up and surprise me.

 

Edit: That foam brought to you direct from 1982.

[ShemRahBrohan 124]

If you ever run across a depressed committee of Xbox specialists, it would be a perfect opportunity to console the console council.

[denimgremlin 1179]

I'm ghost writing Mister Ed's auto biography. It's called Horsetory

[DanEngler 5249]

You know who I bet wishes they got an Amber Alert? All those mosquitoes drinking dinosaur blood!

[nrkist 71]

You know who I bet wishes they got an Amber Alert? All those mosquitoes drinking dinosaur blood!

LOL, no...explain. The amber alerts are for the mosquitoes? Why would we want that? I actually don't want to much investigate further here, despite how funny it is.

[JuhoGrubert 5]

I used to think I was pansexual, until I put my penis in one and realized just how hot a pan can be.

[orphan yachts 217]

they say great Mayans stink alike.

who says that?

the Aztecs

[RobertKeene 11]

Knock knock.

(Who's there?)

The doorbell repairman.

[ComedyGangBang 88]

Guys, these jokes are too good to be foam.

[nrkist 71]

So, everyone says that you should punch a shark in the face, if you are ever in that situation...but punching anybody in the face is the resolution to that situtation.

 

Like...in this situation...was anyone really thinking, "Maybe I should really work this shark's body. Kinda pile away at that for a bit and wear this shark down for the KO". NO! You just punch the thing available to you which happens to be it's FACE and NOSE which is immediately available to you BECAUSE IT'S EATING YOU. You know whats highly effective in any man-man/man-animal fight?

 

Punching something directly in the nose.

 

Go try it out on your pets, and you will see what I'm saying.

[nrkist 71]

So they call it 'First Class Mail', but it should be called 'Probably Never Going to Get There Mail'. It's called 'First Class', but of all classifications of mail, it's infact 'Worst Class'.

[orphan yachts 217]

some of the hardest animals to fight don't have a nose bro

[nrkist 71]

Yeah, like...don't punch a star fish in the face...cause you're actually punching it in the penis...?

 

Look, I dunno how this works, but I am definitely behind a soft coast of star-fish punching.

[nrkist 71]

. I think something happened, and people became very worked up, regarding which animal deserved a nut checking the most. It was quite shameful all round, and unfunnny. That's why this weird space is here...

[nrkist 71]

some of the hardest animals to fight don't have a nose bro

 

The dumb ones...brah...