Paranoia (2013)

[SlidePocket 707]

A new movie just came out this week and it stars Liam Hemsworth, Harrison Ford, Gary Oldman, Amber Heard, Embeth Davidtz and Richard Dreyfuss, plus it was directed by the man who made the likes of "Monster in Law", "The Ugly Truth" and "Killers", and right now it has a 2% on Rotten Tomatoes! Everyone needs to see how bad Paranoia really is!

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

But has anyone SEEN it yet? I'm not going to see it just based on just that, because 2% can mean it's just average bad, not crazy bad, and I can see everything I want for free. I'm more concerned about it being just a waste of time.

[Snake 165]

The Robert Ebert. com review by some guy who is not Robert Ebert says:

 

The story is implausible in ways both big (why would Wyatt entrust this top-secret plan to a self-centered hothead like Adam?) and small (unless the film is set in a world in which "A View to a Kill" really happened, why are all the big tech firms suddenly located in mid-town Manhattan?) and asks viewers to care about one selfish jerk trying to worm his way out of being the pawn of two other selfish jerks. For his part, Luketic tries to mask the narrative shortcomings with a lazily flashy visual style and a staggeringly irritating score that uses cell phone sounds as a recurring motif. Sadly, the rest of the film is so draggy that I kept wanting to pick up and see if there was something more interesting on the other end.

 

So probably just boring-terrible

 

http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/paranoia-2013

[PhillipMedoc 648]

Yeah, jesus, we don't need to waste our time on all the mediocre boring ass garbage that fills up the theaters from around now until Oscar-bait season. I'm waiting for Pacific Rim to hit the second runs but after that I think I'm done for the year; doesn't really look like there's anything exciting on the radar. Time to burn through the Netflix queue.

 

A new movie just came out this week and it stars Liam Hemsworth, Harrison Ford, Gary Oldman, Amber Heard, Embeth Davidtz and Richard Dreyfuss

I literally fell asleep reading that cast list.

[Snake 165]

Yeah, jesus, we don't need to waste our time on all the mediocre boring ass garbage that fills up the theaters from around now until Oscar-bait season. I'm waiting for Pacific Rim to hit the second runs but after that I think I'm done for the year; doesn't really look like there's anything exciting on the radar.

 

World's End

[PhillipMedoc 648]

World's End

I feel like I'm the only person in the world who doesn't think Shaun Of The Dead and Hot Fuzz were God's gift to cinema. I think Shaun is a funny movie and hit early before the zombie craze really set in; I thought Hot Fuzz had some good bits but kinda forgettable. I guess the marketing for World's End is really good because the entire internet seems to have like six boners for that movie right now.

[Quarky 9]

Yeah, jesus, we don't need to waste our time on all the mediocre boring ass garbage that fills up the theaters from around now until Oscar-bait season. I'm waiting for Pacific Rim to hit the second runs but after that I think I'm done for the year; doesn't really look like there's anything exciting on the radar. Time to burn through the Netflix queue.

 

 

I literally fell asleep reading that cast list.

 

There is Snowpiercer coming out, which could fall under "bonkers/good"

 

 

If that confused you, this is the plot:

In a future where a failed global-warming experiment kills off most life on the planet, a class system evolves aboard the Snowpiercer, a train that travels around the globe via a perpetual-motion engine.

[sillstaw 414]

There is Snowpiercer coming out, which could fall under "bonkers/good"

 

Sadly, the Weinsteins seem to think it's too complex for American audiences, and are cutting twenty minutes out and adding narration to dumb it down. Gee, thanks.

[seanotron 2307]

I have six boners for World's End all by myself! And I don't even know what that means!

 

Seriously though, Hot Fuzz is easily one of my favorite movies of all time.

 

[Holiday in Shadaloo 0]

Hot Fuzz was funny, but all of the references in it made it more than just another action-comedy flick.

 

I've yet to see Paranoia (and don't plan on seeing it either), but I have no doubt that it will be the worst film of 2013. I know Harrison Ford has done some questionable films recently, but I expected more from Oldman. I really couldn't believe how bad this film looked when I saw first saw the trailer. It kind of reminds me of Limitless but even worse.

[Blueman29X 72]

I know Harrison Ford has done some questionable films recently, but I expected more from Oldman.

 

And that was your first mistake.

 

[SlidePocket 707]

The box office opening weekend for Paranoia was released and it crashed and burned big time! It debuted at #13 with just $3.5 million (on a budget of $35 million) and it definitely looks like it's gonna be gone from theaters within the next three or four weeks.

[Kream15 11]

Only thing I was paranoid about was unexpectedly seeing Voldemort's face on the back of Harrison Ford's shaved head