Episode 32 — B.J. Novak, Our Close Friend

[TheClassyHobo 64]

http://youtu.be/b90Cf6ARscc?t=8s

 

please, everyone, remember to have this video playing as you browse the forums this week so as to have the authentic Hollywood Handbook Experience.

 

I actually did this.

 

I know I never comment but I am always keep my eyes on all of your comments so tread lightly...

[xoValeriexo 4369]

Great pic this week, you guys!

 

 

Wait a sec. Computer, enhance sector G2.

 

 

Enhance...

 

 

What the... Computer, upgrade the bitmat RGB, and can i get a lock on the pixel radius?

 

 

Good lord, what the fu... Wha... Enhance.

 

 

Oh my god.

 

Edit: I need a job.

 

Anton, enhance.

 

This is amazing and you are my best friend now. Sorry to whoever I said was my best friend before. I don't even remember you.

[Bozos of Basketball 3689]

Can't wait to listen to this 'sode. I don't have a TV anymore because I threw my TV in the garbage dump and shit on it when Sean said he didn't have one. So podcasts are my only entertainment now between huge important projects I work on and chapter books.

 

Does BJ talk about boofing with Mimbey Kaling? Because you know they boofed on the set of Office Space like 2 trillion times. You just friggin' KNOW it.

[Andrew 4646]

Here's that video you wanted, please send the 100 bitcoin asap as per our deal.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=du-sBTWjc9Q

[Andrew 4646]

Oh shit, sorry guys, that was supposed to be a private message to Freja.

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Have you guys been wishing Brett a happy birthday on Facebook? I feel like it'd be awkward because I don't know him very well (although I did meet him).

[Freja 1290]

Oh shit, sorry guys, that was supposed to be a private message to Freja.

 

Uh. Where's Hayes? Pretty sure that was part of the deal. No bcoins for you, I'm afraid. Besides, I'm more of an engineer kinda gal anyways. I don't know if you know this, but one of them has a motorcycle.

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

PS Check out http://www.laweekly.com/publicspectacle/2014/05/14/hayes-davenport-and-sean-clements-hosts-of-the-hilarious-hollywood-handbook-podcast

[skizelo 2536]

PS Check out http://www.laweekly....andbook-podcast

 

While it's nice to know what kind of shoes the guys are rocking, it makes me think that the journalist was really shy and couldn't tear their eyes from the floor.

[kneisage 2108]

 

While it's nice to know what kind of shoes the guys are rocking, it makes me think that the journalist was really shy and couldn't tear their eyes from the floor.

 

Or maybe he had his eyes on... well... how to put this? A certain part of the male anatomy... an area where Hayes and Sean are particularly umm... endowed?

 

PS Freja what is your cat's name? big fan of cats over here

[robinsbruce 4985]

Didnt know frej-dawg was a bitcoin miner. Thats pretty 133T, I hear its hard work down in those mines. Be careful so you dont get the graphical hash lung. Wouldn't want that special needs kitty to have to fend for itself in the wilds of whatever bullshit Midwestern corn filled state you rage in.

[Freja 1290]

Andy, my cat's name is Otis. I salute you for being a cat lover!

 

BRR, thanks for your concern but I think he'd be fine on the streets if I died from the bitcoin consumption. He somehow survived circa 4 years living on the streets of Portland while deaf and blind and weird shit growing in his ear. Probably infected a bunch of cat honeys with his deadly FIV virus along the way, too. That's my boy! Oh and you'd know I live in Portland (ME) and not some bullshit midwest hog farm state if you had Facebook. You should see me on there, rippin it up!! Been clicking "like" on a bunch of statuses and everything. So fun and you're missing all of it!

[robinsbruce 4985]

I always thought Otis was the dog and Milo was the cat? Was my childhood a lie? WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE

[PatrickMichaelMeyer 189]

PS Check out http://www.laweekly....andbook-podcast

 

This is exactly how it feels right before your favorite underground band starts getting played 6 times a day on KROQ. Dammit, now The Handbook will be podcasting 5 straight sold-out nights at the Forum and we'll be lucky to hear those fun little stifled laughs over some jagoff behind you cradling his girlfriend in his arms and loudly asking her what "Offer-Only" means! FUCK!

[kneisage 2108]

I always thought Otis was the dog and Milo was the cat? Was my childhood a lie? WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE

 

Cats don't understand English so it doesn't really matter

[Freja 1290]

I always thought Otis was the dog and Milo was the cat? Was my childhood a lie? WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON HERE

 

Otis as in Otis Redding. I name all my cats after soul singers. I technically have 3 other ones but uhhh I recently lost custody of them ("mommy and daddy can't be together anymore but we still love you guys and nothing's gonna change, you'll still go to the same school and live in the same house" etc. etc)

 

edit: gonna stfu about cats now, i promise. back to the regularly scheduled HH forum programming

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

 

Otis as in Otis Redding. I name all my cats after soul singers. I technically have 3 other ones but uhhh I recently lost custody of them ("mommy and daddy can't be together anymore but we still love you guys and nothing's gonna change, you'll still go to the same school and live in the same house" etc. etc)

 

edit: gonna stfu about cats now, i promise. back to the regularly scheduled HH forum programming

 

It seems as if you've struck gold. You should wrote a book (or a spec-script or something or whatever) that's teaching life lessons to people by teaching them to cats or something. Like dealing with breakups, or deaths. It could be a new kid's book.

[robinsbruce 4985]

 

Otis as in Otis Redding. I name all my cats after soul singers. I technically have 3 other ones but uhhh I recently lost custody of them ("mommy and daddy can't be together anymore but we still love you guys and nothing's gonna change, you'll still go to the same school and live in the same house" etc. etc)

 

edit: gonna stfu about cats now, i promise. back to the regularly scheduled HH forum programming

 

One more kitty kitty query, do you have multiple cats for Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings or is it just one funky ass cat? Or would all of the members of said dap kings get their own cat?

 

Alright, I'm done. I can show myself out, thanks.

[kneisage 2108]

All of the cats my family has ever owned have all started with B's (Baby, Bonnie, Becky, Belle, Button, and Bo) but sadly all but Bo have passed. We are now discussing sad cat stories, right?

[OcterDoctopus 1079]

PS Check out http://www.laweekly....andbook-podcast

...The Reality Show Show, focusing on unscripted TV. It was a slog. "We were doing a bad podcast that nobody liked," Clements says

 

That sounds like a bunch of "gotcha" media bullshit and I'm certain that quote was taken way out of context.

[greggy 15909]

 

Cats don't understand English so it doesn't really matter

lol

[Andrew 4646]

cats are weird because their like lil' lions, but dogs are lil' wolves so it all works out in the end I guess.

[kobthatreal 5896]

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. ENOUGH. TAKE THIS SHIT OVER TO CAT MATTERS FORUM, WHICH CLEARLY ISNT GOING ANY FUCKING WHRE BECAUSE I POSTED BOUT MY CAT POLO MONTHS AGO AND MICHAEL SHITSHOW WALTER AINT SAID A DICK FUUUCKKKING WORRRRD.

[Toby Keith Sweat 1000]

PS Check out http://www.laweekly....andbook-podcast

 

It's cool to know that Hayes and I are the same age & while he's out friggen banging Elaine from Seinfeld on the reg in the backseat of his Tesla, I'm over here in fucking Bumfuck Wherever, USA harvesting oats or whatever, surfing the net for Julie Louis nip-slip pics while riding the bus.

[showshowbro 1177]

yo andy kneis and i click 'like' at the same time EVERY TIME.

 

suckers.

 

but seriously, every time i go to 'like' a previously unliked post -- it returns that both andy and i like it.

 

SPOOKY.