Episode 157 — IQ of a Corpse

[JulyDiaz 2797]

Tim Meadows, Matt Walsh, and Peter Hulne show us what the first encounter between Bill Clinton & Monica Lewinsky was really like on this week’s improv4humans with Matt Besser! They’ll also execute a poolside porn shoot, establish fight rules, and follow the life of a father with the IQ of a corpse. Plus, they’ll travel to Australia in order to gather ideas for more episodes of Cosmos. Be sure to watch many of the stars of improv4humans on the new Hulu series Hotwives of Orlando. This is some funny shit and it’s all available now on Hulu Plus. Make sure to get the Upright Citizens Brigade television show season 3 now available on DVD, the UCB Comedy Improv Manual, Matt Besser’s new comedy album at mattbesser.com, and Dragoon’s new album at dragoongalaxy.bandcamp.com!

[Dhezballah 462]

The Australian accents in this were actually quite good.

[KajusX 1807]

I imagine that those topless ladies by the pool were of the mindset that breasts should not be inherently sexualized, wanted to get some sun/cool off, and felt comfortable doing it while construction dudes lost their fucking minds.

 

I loved the LotR-inspired porno parody sketch that came afterward. Tim's writer character taking umbrage with the actors' going off-book was hilarious.

[Erudite crudite 225]

Boy, I really didn't like the discussion of Monica Lewinisky before the skit. Saying that she should be living in a shack and that she's getting appropriate criticism is totally buying into the narrative that bullies have written for her. It's the reason that she is right to do what she's doing now.

 

Lewinsky was wrong to get involved with Clinton. That's true. But, well, take the worst sexual decision you've ever made in your life. Imagine that every person in America knew that about you, and that's all that they knew about you. That would be horrible, right? How many of your friends do you think have fooled around with someone else in a relationship when they were in their early twenties? How much criticism do you think they deserve for that? If every single talk show host on the planet started calling your friend a slut and started making jokes about how much she likes cum, would you think he or she deserved it and that it was fair criticism? Or would you think that there could reach a point at which the "criticism" became sexist bullying? Monica was a young girl who made a mistake, but holy shit yes, she was bullied harder than nearly anyone before her for what was a youthful mistake. (Not to mention, it's little more understandable for a young woman to get involved with some guy who approaches her if he's the PRESIDENT. If Clinton asked me to blow him and stick a cigar up my butt, I'd probably do it.)

 

Then there's the self-promotion stuff, but remember this: Lewinsky was court-ordered to not say anything about Clinton for years and years. She had no voice, and she did not appear on TV for a long time, so comedians and late night hosts invented a whole persona for her that bore no resemblance to reality. All of her friends said they saw nothing of Monica in the popular conception of Monica. She lost control of her own identity, and that fake identity was the one everyone saw, so she could not go out for a coffee without the world slutshaming her and people on the street calling her fat. Her life was ruined, and she basically tried to retreat into a shack (like Besser says that she still should be doing), but that was impossible. Besser saying that "If you want people to leave you alone, don't go in TV; it's not like she was a celebrity before" is totally false and gets the order of events wrong. She was a celebrity without any self-promotion and could not avoid it. The whole country was baying for her blood, even though they only knew her as a cartoon. Monica tried to remain private, but privacy was basically impossible, so a few years after the trials she tried to reclaim her image while also paying off her legal debts. After all, she had millions of dollars in legal fees, and media execs were lining up at her door with million dollar contracts. That is hard to ignore. She turned down the really clownish ones like Celebrity Boxing, and instead did a few other gigs that paid enormously. I thought it was pretty hypocritical to hear comedians mocking someone else taking a well-paying gig on a reality show. Are all of you proud of every one of your past credits? You wouldn't host a reality dating show for millions of dollars when all other avenues of income were destroyed?

 

Doubtlessly she found something a little thrilling about the celebrity she was receiving, but is that really worthy of criticism? It seems human to me. Not to mention, she was only about 25 at the time. Once she dipped her toe in those waters and got bullied even harder, she *did* disappear for a long time and tried to reclaim her private life. She's only now re-emerged, ten years later.

 

Anyway. Watch her speech. It is great.

[mattbesser 605]

Boy, I really didn't like the discussion of Monica Lewinisky before the skit. Saying that she should be living in a shack and that she's getting appropriate criticism is totally buying into the narrative that bullies have written for her. It's the reason that she is right to do what she's doing now.

 

Lewinsky was wrong to get involved with Clinton. That's true. But, well, take the worst sexual decision you've ever made in your life. Imagine that every person in America knew that about you, and that's all that they knew about you. That would be horrible, right? How many of your friends do you think have fooled around with someone else in a relationship when they were in their early twenties? How much criticism do you think they deserve for that? If every single talk show host on the planet started calling your friend a slut and started making jokes about how much she likes cum, would you think he or she deserved it and that it was fair criticism? Or would you think that there could reach a point at which the "criticism" became sexist bullying? Monica was a young girl who made a mistake, but holy shit yes, she was bullied harder than nearly anyone before her for what was a youthful mistake. (Not to mention, it's little more understandable for a young woman to get involved with some guy who approaches her if he's the PRESIDENT. If Clinton asked me to blow him and stick a cigar up my butt, I'd probably do it.)

 

Then there's the self-promotion stuff, but remember this: Lewinsky was court-ordered to not say anything about Clinton for years and years. She had no voice, and she did not appear on TV for a long time, so comedians and late night hosts invented a whole persona for her that bore no resemblance to reality. All of her friends said they saw nothing of Monica in the popular conception of Monica. She lost control of her own identity, and that fake identity was the one everyone saw, so she could not go out for a coffee without the world slutshaming her and people on the street calling her fat. Her life was ruined, and she basically tried to retreat into a shack (like Besser says that she still should be doing), but that was impossible. Besser saying that "If you want people to leave you alone, don't go in TV; it's not like she was a celebrity before" is totally false and gets the order of events wrong. She was a celebrity without any self-promotion and could not avoid it. The whole country was baying for her blood, even though they only knew her as a cartoon. Monica tried to remain private, but privacy was basically impossible, so a few years after the trials she tried to reclaim her image while also paying off her legal debts. After all, she had millions of dollars in legal fees, and media execs were lining up at her door with million dollar contracts. That is hard to ignore. She turned down the really clownish ones like Celebrity Boxing, and instead did a few other gigs that paid enormously. I thought it was pretty hypocritical to hear comedians mocking someone else taking a well-paying gig on a reality show. Are all of you proud of every one of your past credits? You wouldn't host a reality dating show for millions of dollars when all other avenues of income were destroyed?

 

Doubtlessly she found something a little thrilling about the celebrity she was receiving, but is that really worthy of criticism? It seems human to me. Not to mention, she was only about 25 at the time. Once she dipped her toe in those waters and got bullied even harder, she *did* disappear for a long time and tried to reclaim her private life. She's only now re-emerged, ten years later.

 

Anyway. Watch her speech. It is great.

 

I just read her speech. It is shameful. Cabin in the woods is too good for her. She needs to go to an igloo.

You have been invited to Case Closed!

[robinsbruce 4985]

I love Tim Meadows. That is all.

[mattman92ish 823]

"This man has the IQ of a corpse" ...thank you for that

[AndyPacheco-Fores 437]

The Lewinsky scene was funny as hell but Besser, why should Lewinsky have to suffer exile while Clinton gets to bask in continued popularity? Is this an Arkansas thing where you're just mad at her because you love Clinton because he's from Arkansas? Lewinsky didn't ask to become a household name and once she was she tried to take control of her own image and at least get something out of this horrible thing that happened to her. She's tried to get a normal job and no one would hire her, those stupid publicity stunts were her only way to make a living. How can you call that shameful? Where's your empathy?

[mattbesser 605]

The Lewinsky scene was funny as hell but Besser, why should Lewinsky have to suffer exile while Clinton gets to bask in continued popularity? Is this an Arkansas thing where you're just mad at her because you love Clinton because he's from Arkansas? Lewinsky didn't ask to become a household name and once she was she tried to take control of her own image and at least get something out of this horrible thing that happened to her. She's tried to get a normal job and no one would hire her, those stupid publicity stunts were her only way to make a living. How can you call that shameful? Where's your empathy?

Actually she did ask to become a household name by going on SNL, by hosting a reality dating show, Jenny Craig. She clearly loved being famous and she had nothing to be famous for but being an adulteress and saving a cum stained dress. If she had stepped out of the public eye then she wouldn't had gotten as much "bullying". Not all criticism is bullying. She is not beyond criticism. I was never mad at her for telling on Clinton or blowing him. I never thought "That whore!" She's not a slut whore she's a fame whore.

I'm not just an Arkansan, my family is friends with the Clintons. So where is my empathy? With Hillary.

[Bernard_Shakey 3484]

Gods-mack sucks. I liked them better the first time I heard them as Alice in Chains.

[Kickpuncher 5012]

"Hodor."

[Joe Lerini 7329]

Gods-mack sucks. I liked them better the first time I heard them as Alice in Chains.

I could suddenly go for some Raisin Bran.

[Charlie Murphy Brown 4977]

I love Tim Meadows. That is all.

 

I love Alice in Chains. That is all. And Tim Meadows as well.

 

They come to snuff the rooster, no excuses then I know, everyday it's something

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

This episode is possibly GOAT. Some of the funniest scenes yet. I kind of agree that Monica was shamed a little bit too much, but she does have some accountability. Also, Matt, if you get a case closed over this, you should definitely try to have a female comedian on to hear a woman's point of view on the situation.

[Bernard_Shakey 3484]

 

I love Alice in Chains. That is all. And Tim Meadows as well.

 

They come to snuff the rooster, no excuses then I know, everyday it's something

Don't get me wrong. I love Chains too. I know that Godsmack started as a AiC cover/tribute band or something, but man, there is a vast difference between the two as far as talent goes.

[greggy 15909]

 

I love Alice in Chains. That is all. And Tim Meadows as well.

 

They come to snuff the rooster, no excuses then I know, everyday it's something

I love everything. That is all.

[BrettMorris 1862]

I hate that Godsmack is even compared to Alice In Chains. It's like the dumb-fuck rock you hear as background music to UFC fights. It's like some evil genius sent them, Creed, Nickelback, etc to completely wipe out the entire legacy of the awesome early-mid 90s shit. Speaking of Monica...man, late 90s sucked.

[blazeheart 48]

Posehndon.

 

[Numlocks 14]

The Lewinsky scene was funny as hell but Besser, why should Lewinsky have to suffer exile while Clinton gets to bask in continued popularity? Is this an Arkansas thing where you're just mad at her because you love Clinton because he's from Arkansas? Lewinsky didn't ask to become a household name and once she was she tried to take control of her own image and at least get something out of this horrible thing that happened to her. She's tried to get a normal job and no one would hire her, those stupid publicity stunts were her only way to make a living. How can you call that shameful? Where's your empathy?

 

She didn't ask to be a household name? Then why was she going on tv shows trying to cash in? If you wanna live in the public spotlight then you should be subject to criticism and ridicule just everyone else is. And being a media whore is the not the only she could make money. She could get a damn job just like everyone else.

[AndyPacheco-Fores 437]

Actually she did ask to become a household name by going on SNL, by hosting a reality dating show, Jenny Craig. She clearly loved being famous and she had nothing to be famous for but being an adulteress and saving a cum stained dress. If she had stepped out of the public eye then she wouldn't had gotten as much "bullying". Not all criticism is bullying. She is not beyond criticism. I was never mad at her for telling on Clinton or blowing him. I never thought "That whore!" She's not a slut whore she's a fame whore.

I'm not just an Arkansan, my family is friends with the Clintons. So where is my empathy? With Hillary.

 

Check your timeline Matt, she didn't ask to be famous. The criticism and straight up abuse she got didn't start with her media appearances. You think when the Starr report came out she thought to herself "Oh cool, now I can be a celebrity on TV" and jumped for joy? She was only in a position to be on SNL because she was already a household name in the first place. Going on SNL or Jenny Craig or doing a line of handbags did not make her a household name or more famous than she already was, it just put a little money in her pocket. And remember that she couldn't (and still can't) get a real job, no "respectable" employer would touch her with a ten foot pole. She's been Scarlet Lettered, and that's on us. You can empathize with both Lewinsky and Hillary without contradiction, they've both been wronged by Bill, the media, and the public.

[mattbesser 605]

 

Check your timeline Matt, she didn't ask to be famous. The criticism and straight up abuse she got didn't start with her media appearances. You think when the Starr report came out she thought to herself "Oh cool, now I can be a celebrity on TV" and jumped for joy? She was only in a position to be on SNL because she was already a household name in the first place. Going on SNL or Jenny Craig or doing a line of handbags did not make her a household name or more famous than she already was, it just put a little money in her pocket. And remember that she couldn't (and still can't) get a real job, no "respectable" employer would touch her with a ten foot pole. She's been Scarlet Lettered, and that's on us. You can empathize with both Lewinsky and Hillary without contradiction, they've both been wronged by Bill, the media, and the public.

Check your timeline. The moment she decided to keep that cum stained dress is the moment she decided she wanted everyone to know she had an affair with Clinton. SNL, etc. just further proved she loves the limelight. If she was so hurt then why stay in the spotlight. Dont tell me being on SNL is a big payday. It's just fame.

[AndyPacheco-Fores 437]

Check your timeline. The moment she decided to keep that cum stained dress is the moment she decided she wanted everyone to know she had an affair with Clinton. SNL, etc. just further proved she loves the limelight. If she was so hurt then why stay in the spotlight. Dont tell me being on SNL is a big payday. It's just fame.

How do you know she wanted everyone to know? Plenty of secret mistresses have keepsakes. I'd maybe believe that if she'd actually come forward with it herself but she didn't, Linda Tripp convinced her not to clean it and then snitched on her. What do you think her plan was? "Ok so my friend will secretly record our conversations, I'll get investigated by the government, this little website Drudge Report will become one of the most popular websites of all time and usher in a new era of internet media from covering it, it'll catch on with the national traditional press, the President will get impeached, and then I'll spend the rest of my life as a professional punchline! Brilliant." Come on.

 

As for SNL, sure it wasn't a big payday, but it was still a payday. Again, no one will hire her for actual jobs. She hasn't had a full-time job for over 15 years. She was an intern before, you think she had money saved up to pay her legal bills and support herself?

 

Now enough debate prep, save it for Case Closed.

[BrettMorris 1862]

The idea of someone going on SNL strictly for a little pocket change is hilarious

[Erudite crudite 225]

Uh oh, I was a little worried I might get an invitation to Case Closed! I think I might be a little too shy about public speaking in front of a podcast audience. I don't have much experience doing that and the audience might be bigger than I'm comfortable with. On the other hand, it might be a lot of fun. Let me give it a bit of thought. (pfchangs, if you feel like stepping in, be my guest: you're killing it in this thread.) Thank you for the invitation, in any case.

 

I have to say that I didn't realize you thought that Lewinsky kept the dress in order to set everything off! That is more extreme than I thought. Linda Tripp convinced Lewinsky to keep the dress as insurance just in case Clinton ever sought reprisal or tried to fire her. That's on tape. Lewinsky wanted to get rid of it.

 

Lewinsky was already a household name when she went on SNL. Molly Shannon had already played her 10 times at that point for almost a whole year. Going on SNL was Monica's way to stop being the butt of the joke by making herself seem to be in on the joke. That's a totally standard and reasonable way to try to fix a reputation. It didn't really work, but you can see what she was up to. (It actually worked somewhat: SNL stopped making fun of her, and jokes focussed on Tripp instead of Lewinsky.) She wasn't looking for a payday or looking for fame. She had been forced against her will to have a public image, and she was looking for image management.

 

The Jenny Craig thing made a ton of sense as a response to the shameful cracks about her being fat. It's actually a pretty strong way of announcing, "Fuck you, media, I am making it so you do not get to call me fat anymore."

 

I still don't really know what your criticism is, other than some sort of complaint about her character for being fame-hungry. I don't really get what would be so wrong with that (it's not like she caused problems with the presidency *because* she was fame-hungry), but I don't even think it's true. She didn't stay in the spotlight; she basically did go live in a shack. If she's so fame-hungry, why haven't we heard from her in over a decade? You think she hasn't been on Dancing With The Stars because they haven't asked her?

[xoValeriexo 4369]

I don't like that Bill Clinton is respected, while Monica Lewinsky is just some fame-whore. Who is the bigger piece of shit in their interaction? The middle-aged President of the United States who cheats on his wife by getting his dick sucked by an intern in her twenties or the woman who sucked his dick and could arguably be said to like attention? Honestly, if you think you can love Bill and hate Monica reasonably, I'm going to get pretty angry over here.