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agata

Episode 84 — Moments of Greatness, Our Constant Companions

By agata, in Hollywood Handbook

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Houston    4819

Houston
Posted

People like you are the reason why racism isn't dead in this country.

 

You are on the record as saying you don't like jokes or fun, but your crafty words (exhibit A above) suggest otherwise. Is your hatred of jokes a joke? Is this what meta is?

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dixon    5920

dixon
Posted

You guys it's my birthday. Where's my group video? Thought it would be up by now.

  • Like 20

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watchayakan    1021

watchayakan
Posted
You guys it's my birthday. Where's my group video? Thought it would be up by now.

We all worked on it but I am that guy in the video:

  • Like 3

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Hayes N Sean    258

Hayes N Sean
Posted

 

I don't get it.

 

Doctors are for people. Cookies are for eating. Some people like eating crumbly cookies. It's a real shame that you would infer that there's something wrong with a crumbly cookie. So wrong, in fact, that the cookie would need to go see a human doctor because it's unhealthy. Cookies should be proud of themselves whatever their consistency. All cookies are beautiful the way they are. People like you are the reason why racism isn't dead in this country.

 

 

Personally I believe that a soft gooey cookie is the only cookie worth eating, if that makes me a cookie racist, well I guess I'm a cookie racist. Let me try another joke though.

 

A duck walks into a bar and says "you got any grapes?" The bartender says "nope, no grapes" then the duck says ok and walks away.

 

The next day the duck comes back into the bar and says "you got any grapes?" the bartender says "No, we sell alcohol and beer here, we don't sell any grapes" so the duck says ok and walks away.

 

The next day the duck comes back and says "you got any grapes?" the bartender says "No, I don't have any grapes, and if you ask again I'm going to nail your face to the bar" the duck then walks away.

 

The next day the duck comes back and says "you got any nails?" The bartender says "No, we don't have nails here" Then the duck says "You got any grapes?"

 

HAHA get it...

 

Please Chanson, you have to let jokes and laughter into your heart.

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chanson    9697

chanson
Posted

I don't think ducks are allowed into bars in Washington State. It's unhygienic. They have salmonella and stuff.

 

Edit: Also they bite.

  • Like 6

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xoValeriexo    4369

xoValeriexo
Posted

“Howdy neighbor.” Tim turned around, surprised to see his neighbor, Wilson, looking over his fence at him. “Wilson, you scared me.” “I didn’t mean to frighten you, Tim. I just wanted to let you know there’s a hole in the fence.” Tim looked around the fence for a hole. When he found it, he also found Wilson’s hard cock sticking through it. Tim didn’t want to stare, but he couldn’t help it. “It’s okay, you don’t have to pretend, Tim.” Tim gulped, Wilson was on to him. Had he heard him singing their song? Every time there was a neighborhood barbecue, Wilson would play Kool and the Gang’s “Celebration” just to make Tim laugh. It stopped being funny after a while though, and it had become something he cherished, something he yearned for in the night. When he was missing Wilson, he would sing to himself, “Celebrate good times, come on.” Now Wilson was here, almost as if he’d heard the mating call. “Tim, this dick isn’t going to jerk itself off.” “What if Jill sees us?” “She’s at the grocery store, she won’t be back for hours.” Tim thought about his boys. What would they think of him if they knew what he was up to with their neighbor? He wasn’t worried about Brad, Brad was strong. Randy would be okay too, he was smart. But what about little Mark? His emotions have been out of control lately. He’s beginning to wear all black and experimenting with eyeliner. What would this love affair do to Mark? Tim couldn’t help himself – he reached for Wilson’s dick and gave it a firm tug. Wilson was yanked up against the fence, hard. He groaned in pain, which only made Tim more turned on. Tim lubed up his hand with Binford’s car wax and began tugging away. He imagined his hand was Mario Andretti and Wilson’s hard-on was the race track. Tim sped down the track as fast as his car would take him. Just as Wilson was coming, Tim felt himself ready to blow too. He grunted, “Hoh oh hoh.” Then he heard a familiar voice say “Tim?” He turned around, he saw eyes filled with tears, hands shaking, flannelled chest heaving. “Al…” But it was too late. Al had seen everything and he would surely tell his family about his rendezvous with the chiseled-bodied Wilson. Nothing could repair this old house. Not even Bob Vila himself.

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dixon    5920

dixon
Posted

Val, this is the best birthday present a guy could ask for.

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kobthatreal    5896

kobthatreal
Posted

Whatever Dixon. I guess when i thought we was friends i was just kissing pink and by that i mean i had my head up my own ass kissing my fucking intestines which is so gross and makes me think of u cause ur gross to me bye

  • Like 9

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dixon    5920

dixon
Posted

Sorry, let me clarify. Val's story is the best a guy could ask for, because I could ask for a Home Improvement J/O Fan Fic. Yours is the best present a guy could get, I just have no idea how I'd ask for...that.

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RadBradMcGruff    8

RadBradMcGruff
Posted

 

 

great first post

 

Thanks Joe, your approval means more to me than you will ever know! If you liked this one, you should check out my second post in which I upped the momentum on a recent thread about skiing

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kobthatreal    5896

kobthatreal
Posted

All is forgiven once again. Excuse my intense fit of jealousy regarding Valeries exxxcellent fan fiction.

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xoValeriexo    4369

xoValeriexo
Posted

Brett has 47 likes on his "I DID THE LEVELS" comment on page 4. Nearly earned himself a popular star.

 

 

Rod Aug, did you see the pic of Hurricane Dennis on the bottom of Page 12? It's a good'un, you're gonna wanna check it out.

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SteveH    11126

SteveH
Posted

where is steveH?

 

Here I am. Did you have a question?

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SteveH    11126

SteveH
Posted

 

 

Don't say his name. We just successfully finished banning him to his home dimension of Postopia and I don't want to have to go through the process of trying to send him back through that portal again.

 

ouchy.

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Joe McGurl    8358

Joe McGurl
Posted

Thanks Joe, your approval means more to me than you will ever know! If you liked this one, you should check out my second post in which I upped the momentum on a recent thread about skiing

 

You lost my approval because there is no thread but the episode thread. You have failed me for the last time, BradCarlson

  • Like 7

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