Episode 96 — Tom Scharpling Again, Our Close Friend

[chicknsandwich 2495]

McGurl spewing fire on the forums! Watch out or you might get scorched.

[RocHoover 400]

That's how we do it in Scra-in

[RocHoover 400]

So somebody give me the cliffs notes..

 

Will I still be able to download episodes with my podcatcher via rss feed?

[Asteck 1250]

Gary focused on the center of his co-worker Alan's forehead. He was putting so much concentration into not rolling his eyes that he almost didn't hear Alan's reply.

"Yeah, uh, I don't know, I haven't watched it in like ten years." Alan had said.

"But didn't you think that that was the episode where you really felt the connection between Rory and Jess? It was really special because it sets off the conflict for the whole season and you feel like you're getting to see this whole other side of Rory. " said Gary.

At this point he was grasping at straws. Alan didn't get it. He'd known going into this conversation that Alan wouldn't be able to contribute much. He'd had Alan pegged ever since he'd said "Cool shirt Gary, is that a band?" to the Hey Nong Man tee he'd had custom made. No, it wasn't a band.

"I guess so... it's been a while" Alan replied, eyeing the receptionist. Gary turned in time to see her drop the face she'd been making at Alan and quickly look back to her computer screen.

"Well, do you remember the X-files? There's that episode 'Home" that's such a departure from the standard monster-of-the-week format . You really get the sense..."

 

...

 

Gary picked at the Bloomin' Onion that had just been delivered to the booth where he, Diane and they're son Michael sat in silence.

"This is really one of the best American appetizers." Gary said, trying to draw Diane's attention from either the window or Michael. "Don't you think it's so interesting how America became infatuated with Australia in the 80's? It was like there was this whole boom with Crocodile Dundee and like, didn't you know kids who had boomerangs?"

After a long pause Diane replied "What are you talking about Gary?" finally making eye-contact. She sounded exhausted.

"Just trying to make conversation." said Gary.

She'd been like this for a while now - ever since he had sent the email to Tig Notaro on her behalf. That had really exposed a side of Diane he hadn't seen before. The Diane he married would have wanted to help Tig, but this Diane... This Diane kept asking "Why do I have to give her my kidney? There are so many other people on waitlists who need organ donations. Why now?" Gary had explained that he would have donated his if he were compatible and how it was really shocking for Diane to have an opportunity to help somebody and not be willing to do so. He assumed she would have been more selfless when he volunteered her. Now she was making him look bad in front of Tig.

Diane quietly nodded to herself for a moment. "I think I'm going to take Michael home. He's tired. Can you uber back?"

"Sure" said Gary. He picked off another piece of the onion. "More for me." he thought.

 

...

 

On August 17, 2015 Gary sat at his computer, his fingers trembling above the keyboard. Something was wrong. The suits at Earwolf were trying to ruin his community and worse, they were making Scott take the blame. Scott would never have done something like this. Scott got it. And Gary got Scott. They would probably be friends if they ever met. Gary had to help save Scott and he knew just how to do it. "Don't worry, I won't let them make you a shill, buddy" thought Gary as he logged into the Earwolf forums. He sat for a moment and typed "Hey Scott I hope when Adam Sachs has to write an apology letter to the droves of Earwolf fans he alienated with this Howl bullshit he speaks on how they put a price on your reputation. It's not about entitlement. It's about respecting the community who made you the profitable company you are. What's next are they going to try to salvage this shit show by branching into another company called Wolfster or something? Learn from the past, idiots. "

He leaned back in his chair with his arms behind his head, admiring his work. He'd done it. Now all he had to do was wait for Scott to read it and like the post. He smiled and hit refresh.

[Shrek & Donkey Kong 4336]

I was against this idea. I then realized that I still have 6 more months on my WTF membership, which transfers over to Howl for the remainder of the subscription for $2/month rather than $5. Not happy that it's all streaming, but happy about content.

[greggy 15909]

lol u were a wtf subscriber

[greggy 15909]

jk i love podcasts

[SteveH 11126]

They're wonderful

[DoctorFrog 649]

jk i love podcasts

 

Podcasts Are Wonderful (.com)

[robotam 4493]

I just got back from Scotland, they have some thing on at the minute. There's some funny people doing shows. The boys should try to get some of them to be guests on this podcast.

 

I think Bridget Christie or Daniel Kitson might be good fun.

 

Who should I email my suggestion to? Who books the guests? Brett? Mr Skipps?

[robotam 4493]

I'm going to bed now and the new episode should be out by the time I wake up. If you want to answer me in the next thread, I'd be happy enough with that.

[DoctorFrog 649]

Yeah. Mr. Skipps does the booking.

[orphan yachts 217]

this is like a slow-motion slap fight spoken out in real speed. the timing in these bit is truly legendary

[mikebonetti 3718]

The questions for Scott thread is making me anxious. I should've just stayed in here.

[LydonBergin 420]

Man, I go on a month long, life changing journey across America and come back to find out everything has gone to Hell? <-- Do you see that friggin capital H? Tim and Joe, congrats on your starring roles in Snarknado 2: The One Where We Make Scott Really Uncomfortable.

 

JK guys I don't give a shit.

[DoctorFrog 649]

Just realized I didn't follow McGurl's forum guidelines. Here is a picture of my pet. He is a Good Dog.

 

A picture of my D will soon follow. He is a Good Dad.

 

[Joe McGurl 8358]

Sorry I'm so late to respond to your hangout impression of me Norm but I wasn't doing homework, I was retroactively writing this response to you in the forum. Ugh, time travel is a fickle bitch, wish I could explain it in a way that made sense but I don't even know when you're going to be seeing this post! I mean I'm writing it now but while I'm writing it, you're watching me write it on the hangout and getting the impression that I'm doing homework and so you're thinking of writing a post in the forums that you think that I'm doing homework but I'm actually responding to the post that you haven't even made yet! I tried dropping a hint about my time travel status when Veebs asked a would you rather question about going back and changing one thing from the past and I said that YOU CAN'T CHANGE THE PAST BECAUSE THERE ARE FIXED POINTS IN TIME AND WHAT HAPPENED ALWAYS WILL HAPPEN NO MATTER HOW HARD WE TRY TO CHANGE IT WE NEVER CAN SOMETHING WILL ALWAYS LEAD TO THE CHAIN OF EVENTS OF THAT FIXED POINT IN TIME HAPPENING. I was actually referring to this moment right now. I wish I could go back to that hangout and change it and be more active so I could impress you more Norm but nothing will ever change it. Nothing man. That was our time together and no matter how hard each of us try and try and wish that we booked that trip to Italy, it will never have happened. We should've been drinking cheap lambrusco wine on the Janiculum hill overlooking Rome at sunset or discovering great, exciting new bands and art in random warehouses all over Brooklyn but, alas, the both of us were trapped behind the screens of our respective screens and wondering what could've been. Nay, what SHOULD'VE been. Until next time, dear Norm, we shall always have that memory. And I love that memory

[SteveH 11126]

Oh boy. Things just got way worse on the Howl thread. I won't say anymore for fear of being banned.

 

Correction: things just got 100 times better. Handbook formers never disappoint.

[Houston 4819]

Norm. It was good seeing you in the hangout too. (passive aggressively hits post)

[souprman 10477]

Is that Janiculum you're sitting on or are you just happy to see me?

[Game of Scones 5812]

I wish I wasn't a troll.

[souprman 10477]

Wait, which thread is this? Is this the one Fatty2Dicks post on? I can only get off on this if I know Fatty2Dicks is gonna read my posts. Shout out to Fatty2Dicks btw.

[Huge Madea Fan 30]

I think its a great idea. In connection with the howl program, I am creating a new subscription service for the forum called Growl. For just 5 dollars a week I will send you all the comments that were made on the forums in a hand written notebook. You can still read the comments and threads from the last six months but everything before that will be removed and will only go through Growl. The reasons it will work and be a great idea:

 

1. It will get new members on the forum. New members will not have to read through all the past threads and be all confused about where to start.

2. I will create new fun topics for threads that only Growlers (a nickname for people that subscribe to the growl service) can read.

3. I don't have to post ads anymore. New topics will be just straight content, no more ads to read through.

4. I can finally start making money off these forums. People have been given so much great content that i am currently not making money on. Its not fair.

 

To subscribe just send me five dollars in an envelope to my house. I will start writing out the comments once the first payment arrives. Can't wait to get Growl started.

[Silvrwoman 4998]

Breaking news: Omg did you guys hear about this new Howl thing?

Hurry up and listen to every episode today, because tomorrow Aukerman is retiring and Mark Maron will replace him as host of every old episode of CBB

 

[Silvrwoman 4998]

Give me $5 and I will dub over Maron's voice with Scott's words (not really Scott, but me doing an impression of him)

 

"My wife"

That one's your free trial