EPISODE 125 - Steel: LIVE!

[FisterRoboto 7499]

2. Was it just me or were there more references to Batman in this movie than Superman? I know they said that the comic stuff was all junked, but Sparks is clearly Oracle and Batman is referenced like three times. I mean even the Sam Raimi Spider-Man films had more Superman references than a movie based on a Superman character.

Yeah, that was a conscious choice by the director. WB used to have some production notes about Steel, but they've been taken down. Fortunately, someone archived them using the Wayback Machine:

 

http://web.archive.org/web/20080411223603/http://movies.warnerbros.com/steel/cmp/production.html

 

I'd recommend reading the whole thing (it's pretty short), but my favorite part is this quote from Quincy Jones:

 

I have seven children and, as a parent, I'm really aware of the lack of role models for today's kids. It's really left a hole in the world, and I don't mean just for black kids. Their perspective on the future has changed for the worse, and I hate seeing young people who don't believe in the future. Steel -- and I don't want to use that word `superhero,' because he doesn't fly or anything like that -- represents a role model. Let's just call him a `super human being.''

 

Ummm...I don't think "hero" is the part that refers to him flying or anything, Quincy.

[paulscheer 489]

Hey Everyone

 

Just a quick update about GRAMMAR-GATE!

 

Yes, we realized there was a grammar error. Unfortunately we didn't realize it until after the 8PM on Saturday night. All of us missed it at first, Jason, June, The Designer, The T-Shirt Printer, 2 Interns and Me.

 

In between shows I started to get a plan in motion to swap out the shirts for the correct version. I spent most of the day on set trying to make it right. Thankfully the way we are producing these shirts is on a produced by order basis. So it's not like we are stuck with a room full of misprinted T's. Our designer fixed the image. Then we held all the orders, replaced the shirts, and now we taking the orders off hold. It looks like it's all good for orders that were made yesterday.

 

So everyone that ordered will be getting the shirt with the correct Grammar (except 1 person). His/Her shirt was processed before we were able to catch it. So he/she has the rare misprint.

 

Thanks to everyone for being cool about this error. Apparently we only recieved 2 emails about it. Which I'm relieved about. Thanks for your patience.

 

We wanted to do something special for all of you that listen to the show- so this has really been a labor of love on our part setting up this shop learning about Printful and Big Cartel and putting this all together in our spare time. I think we make like .88 cents per shirt, so just know thins't about $$ we just wanted to make it because we thought it was fun and I love the design too.

 

I know there was hesitation here on the board about buying it with the incorrect grammar. So I'm here to assure you it's fixed.

 

So buy away

 

howdidthisgetmade.bigcartel.com

 

Thanks again, you are all the best listeners in the podcast world.

 

-Paul

 

(I'm sure their are Grammar mistakes in this email and I'm okay with it)

[Cameron H. 23786]

If I may, I just wanted to elaborate further on Cam Bert's point regarding the mugger and Steel's "crime fighting" in general.

 

First of all, what exactly was the plan on his first night out? I get that they are eventually revealed to have access to a police scanner, but prior to that, was he just wandering around the city in full plate armor just hoping a crime would happen nearby? It's not like he has a Spidey sense, and stealth isn't exactly his strong suit. Was he just clanking down the streets like a maniac? I mean, that couple is actually extremely lucky that he just happened to pass by. Also, if memory serves, the mugger is the only criminal he actually neutralizes as Steel. Sure, he was able to electro-magnify the guns out of the gang members hands, and that stops the gun fight, but then he just kind of lets them go. Even at the end of the movie, his success seems to be more due to dumb luck and Sparky's weaponized wheelchair, than any direct action taken on his part.

 

And speaking of gang members...

 

There is no way he'd survive that gunfight, right? There are only two possible scenarios in that situation, and both hinge around him getting shot in the dick.

 

 

In the first scenario, if he gets shot in the dick, and we assume that the gangsters are really good shots, there is no reason they wouldn't be aiming for his visibly exposed face. However, this would also mean that the gang members were making the choice to not shoot him in the face and were inexplicably aiming for his dick instead.

 

In the second--and more likely--scenario, the gangsters are actually terrible shots and were just spraying him randomly in a hail of gunfire, some of which just happen to get him in his junk. But, if this is the case, then there is no way that one of the hundreds of bullets being fired at him doesn't hit him directly in his gigantic head.

 

Bottom line: On his first night out, and on his second attempt at superhero-ing, Steel would be 100% dead.

[Cameron H. 23786]

So everyone that ordered will be getting the shirt with the correct Grammar (except 1 person). His/Her shirt was processed before we were able to catch it. So he/she has the rare misprint.

 

God damn it! I am so jealous of this person. After some careful consideration, and my own grammar snafu a couple of pages back, I really wanted one with the rogue apostrophe!

 

Bring it back!

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

Jesus, I didn't know that HDTGM was in it with the Cartel! I imagine it being just like the movie "Sicario", but with t-shirts...and Jason in the Benicio role...

[taylor anne photo 11311]

(I'm sure their are Grammar mistakes in this email and I'm okay with it)

[fanny pack 29]

WHAT IS ITS MISSION?

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[6stringsamurai 12]

You guys wondered what the point of having a wheelchair that could "only stand up" was. The thing is, there's a lot of uses for such a chair, and there are many manufacturers out there who make them. They are widely reported to improve quality of life for those who use them.

 

A standing or elevating wheelchair has many uses when you consider how much of our world is designed for the standing population. There's the everyday things- like shelves, counters, fridges, sinks, stoves, cabinets, dressers, etc. These are minor things to most people, but to someone who can't stand, it becomes a whole new challenge.

 

More importantly, there is the human interaction factor. Spending your life in a chair means people constantly looking down at you (literally and sometimes figuratively). Standing allowed you to meet people face to face, instead of staring at people's crotches.

 

There are also medical benefits as well, including improved circulation, urinary health, bowel function and bone density.

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

You guys wondered what the point of having a wheelchair that could "only stand up" was. The thing is, there's a lot of uses for such a chair, and there are many manufacturers out there who make them. They are widely reported to improve quality of life for those who use them.

 

A standing or elevating wheelchair has many uses when you consider how much of our world is designed for the standing population. There's the everyday things- like shelves, counters, fridges, sinks, stoves, cabinets, dressers, etc. These are minor things to most people, but to someone who can't stand, it becomes a whole new challenge.

 

More importantly, there is the human interaction factor. Spending your life in a chair means people constantly looking down at you (literally and sometimes figuratively). Standing allowed you to meet people face to face, instead of staring at people's crotches.

 

There are also medical benefits as well, including improved circulation, urinary health, bowel function and bone density.

While true, the writers of this film couldn't figure out a way to use a HAMMER properly, so I'm guessing that you put more thought into what that chair could do than they did.

[Cameron H. 23786]

During Steel's first flight from the cops, Sparky hacks into the main traffic computer for the city with the goal of changing the lights green so he can make good on his escape. After a couple of absolutely hilarious missteps, she is successful, and at one point, turns a light from green to red (no yellow light) which causes the wide-eyed cop to careen into crossing traffic. Traffic, I might add, that evidently consisted solely of drivers who seemed to be oblivious to sound of approaching police sirens and also ready to gun it as soon as soon as the light went green.

 

Anyway, while the LAPD is still in hot pursuit--I believe Sparky tells him they are a block and a half behind him--she informs him that: "I should be able to give you greens all the way home." Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that mean she is also giving the squad cars in pursuit "all greens" as well? It seems like it shouldn't really be that much of a problem for them to find out where he's going--which, of course, they do. Multiple police cars converge on the junkyard. They have him dead to rights. And then they do...absolutely nothing! They even have a helicopter! A helicopter that makes a single sweep of the junkyard before the pilot declares, "Nothing down there but a pile of junk." Really, dude?!? Look, I can forgive you for not spotting his motorcycle's headlight in an otherwise deserted part of town--you're piloting your whirlybird, and you've got your diodes and shit you have to watch. I get that. But seriously, wouldn't a junkyard be just about the BEST place for someone to ditch their vehicle and hide among the rubbish? You're just going to dismiss it out of hand? That's downright inexcusable!

[EllenM 943]

QUESTION: for Paul. What would your blockbuster late return call be like? could you please give us a sample of what that would be like to get paul scheer phoning us up and threating us to return a movie! LOL I want to hear more tales from blockbuster horror storys in the future.

 

God that is just so shocking to think about now. they would have a late fee if you didn't return the tape back to the store by 6pm. I think it was maybe 7pm, not sure. a didn't rewind the tape charge, and if you broke the tape, 110 dollars down the drain charge because most tapes are price to rent. i am not sure what it was but I do remember repairing VHS tape once with scotch tape because my VCR had eatten the dam thing, They didn't notice it. That's the worst thing that could happen is the tape getting locked in the VCR that you have to return it the next day.

 

That is next level bonkers to me. They charged for not rewinding a tape? Wasn't there a machine at Blockbuster to do that? Surely there was enough down time that you could factor in rewinding tapes as part of everyday work, like dusting or sweeping.

 

I'm super excited to see if Paul recreates a passive-aggressive voicemail in the next mini-ep.

[wyldride 285]

I would like to co-sign this. This is also the reason why Geordi from Star Trek was never even hinted at being in a romantic relationship.

Well, it was hinted at, but only just: In First Contact they suggest he's with Leah Brahms. But the fact is that the android, the alien and the kid all had better romantic lives than Geordi.

[SevenDollarsWorthofHoobastank 226]

In the Arcade, there was an NBA Jam machine. The Arcade version of that game had Shaq in it, while the home versions didn't. So are we to assume that Shaquille O'Neal exists in this universe, and John Henry Irons gets mistaken for Shaq all the time? Or is this a universe in which Shaq followed into his step-fathers footsteps (Phillip Harrison) into the military and changes his name and never went into the NBA? Or is this just a universe in which Shaq just does not exist at all?

[FisterRoboto 7499]

 

That is next level bonkers to me. They charged for not rewinding a tape? Wasn't there a machine at Blockbuster to do that? Surely there was enough down time that you could factor in rewinding tapes as part of everyday work, like dusting or sweeping.

 

I'm super excited to see if Paul recreates a passive-aggressive voicemail in the next mini-ep.

Blockbuster would charge you for every little thing they could. My sister worked at one for a while. They would definitely charge for rewinding a tape. I think the idea was to discourage every single tape from coming back un-rewound, but it was still part of Blockbuster's "milk every cent you can" business model.

 

A couple years ago, I started going to a local video store here that specializes in foreign and cult movies to pick up stuff I can't find online (they also have legit awesome and obscure staff picks). They all know me there now because I'm in there every couple weeks to grab a handful of movies. And their policies are almost laughably lax once they get to know you. I've shown up a couple days late with some movies, and they were just like, "It's cool." They'd really just rather you come back and keep renting shit than give you grief because you were busy or forgot to rewind a tape (yes, they actually carry VHS).

 

But, yeah, I would love nothing more than to hear more of Paul's Blockbuster stories. That could be a whole episode, and I would probably still listen to it multiple times.

[Reptarftw 27]

I worked at Hollywood Video when the adult softcore Pirates was released to capitalize on the Pirates of the Carribean craze.

 

Mass confusion from so many grandparents either renting for the kids, or "renting for the kids". At some point, we just stopped pointing out which was which.

[ChunkStyle 1160]

In the Arcade, there was an NBA Jam machine. The Arcade version of that game had Shaq in it, while the home versions didn't. So are we to assume that Shaquille O'Neal exists in this universe, and John Henry Irons gets mistaken for Shaq all the time? Or is this a universe in which Shaq followed into his step-fathers footsteps (Phillip Harrison) into the military and changes his name and never went into the NBA? Or is this just a universe in which Shaq just does not exist at all?

 

It would have been great if they made it even more confusing and made reference to him playing ball at LSU.

[jarrycanada 2483]

But, yeah, I would love nothing more than to hear more of Paul's Blockbuster stories. That could be a whole episode, and I would probably still listen to it multiple times.

 

some video stores had these Video Cassette Rewinders and still had the nerve to charge you. now that they know there business is dead they don't. if they are still in business.

I remember one store doing so, the didn't rewind trick. It was a good little scam they had going for them selfs. not sure if it was blockbuster sorry..but they were sure jerks about it. and for the most part why they all are out of business because of there own greed and bad business skills. left a bad impression on the customers.

 

The local family based video stores are better. but not all of them, in the 80s we had one that was run by a bunch of jerks. would hit you for everything they can. then we had the east Indian run video store that had this guy who you never listen to on recommendations. Ohh Opportunity Knocks is a great movie my friend! I'll never forget that guy as long as i live.

 

I'll bet ya Paul was like this kid from better off dead.

 

[Reptarftw 27]

In the Arcade, there was an NBA Jam machine. The Arcade version of that game had Shaq in it, while the home versions didn't. So are we to assume that Shaquille O'Neal exists in this universe, and John Henry Irons gets mistaken for Shaq all the time? Or is this a universe in which Shaq followed into his step-fathers footsteps (Phillip Harrison) into the military and changes his name and never went into the NBA? Or is this just a universe in which Shaq just does not exist at all?

 

So what you're saying is Shane Black didn't write this screenplay.

[firsttimecallerlongtimelistenr 3590]

I am so sorry ....

 

 

(the image of paul holding nothing is primed and ready to go on his instagram page ... so have at it ... )

[deepblueC.R.A.P 5]

-SPOILER ALERT-

BB-8's hides a map to William Strunk and E.B. White's house.

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

 

I worked at a movie theater in the early 2000s, and whenever there was a movie with an interracial kiss or love story, we would get angry letters. There was one guy in particular who was VERY put out about it and sent us threatening letters everytime he saw a film with "race mixing. My manager was like, "Please stop calling us. We don't decide what the studios do." We didn't even decide which movies we got since we were part of a chain.

 

But now whenever i see a movie where people of different races make out, it makes me smile knowing somewhere that asshole is having a heart attack.

YES! I've managed a theater for far longer than I care to admit, and we get stuff like that all the time. The worst time for this is around awards season, because we're a very small market in the biggest chain in the country, and the people of this town don't seem to understand that the entertainment world doesn't revolve around them. But hey, they don't know what the fuck these movies that they can't see are about anyway, but they're up for awards, so if they see them, they must be all sophisticated n' shit.

 

Anyway, we're located right in the middle of "I'm not racist, but..." Country, and a concerned customer once pulled me aside after a film to tell me in a very matter-of-fact way that he thought the black characters in the movie seemed to be portrayed in too heroic of a manner (because like you said, we MAKE the movies, right?). I don't remember what it was exactly, some film where a white doctor goes to the African jungle or something, but apparently the tribespeople were more more noble savage than "Ooga Booga" savage, which disappointed said customer. You better believe though that once we got "Twelve Years A Slave", it became SUPER quotable. It's like there were so many hateful things that these people were just dying to say, and y'know, if someone said it in the movie, it meant it was okay to repeat it constantly and loudly...

 

One of the worst (actually, it became several of the worst) customer reactions we had was to "Brokeback Mountain". It took us a little while to get that one, because it opened in limited release and eventually expanded. As WE all know, there was a lot of hype and controversy going into that one because of the subject matter, which wasn't a surprise or twist or anything that was revealed later on like "The Crying Game" or something. I mean, if you knew ONE thing about "Brokeback", it was that it was the gay cowboy movie, right? Well, imagine the surprise of some shit-kicker around the forty-minute mark that didn't know what the movie was about, that was being dragged to it by a girlfriend that ALSO didn't know what it was about, only that it was up for every award under the sun. We had our share of FURIOUS customers coming out and swearing up a storm at us, like we'd tricked them into seeing it. "I didn't pay to see no gay shit!", I heard more than once, and while there's certainly more to the movie, they would have noticed if they'd taken even 10 fucking seconds to look anything up themselves that yes, they certainly did.

[Kickpuncher 5012]

 

It would have been great if they made it even more confusing and made reference to him playing ball at LSU.

 

Or Western University!

[Cameron H. 23786]

Congratulations to HDTGM for being voted one of Vulture's Top Ten Comedy Podcasts of the year!

 

 

I can't really argue with the list in general, as a lot of great shows are represented, but personally, my top five would have been:

 

1) HDTGM

2) The Adventure Zone

3) MBMBaM

4) Pistol Shrimps Radio

5) CBB

[Reptarftw 27]

Well, imagine the surprise of some shit-kicker around the forty-minute mark that didn't know what the movie was about, that was being dragged to it by a girlfriend that ALSO didn't know what it was about, only that it was up for every award under the sun. We had our share of FURIOUS customers coming out and swearing up a storm at us, like we'd tricked them into seeing it. "I didn't pay to see no gay shit!", I heard more than once, and while there's certainly more to the movie, they would have noticed if they'd taken even 10 fucking seconds to look anything up themselves that yes, they certainly did.

 

I love this image of the assertion of masculinity. Like, the line that crosses "I will let my girlfriend drag me to a random Heath Ledger movie" but ABSOLUTELY stops at guy-on-guy action.

 

WHOA! NO! NO. NO BUTT SEX. I AM WAY TOO MUCH OF A MAN FOR THIS. GET UP, HONEY. I HAVE TO LET THE ENTIRE LOBBY KNOW THAT I DRAW THE LINE AT GAY SEX. WHAT? YES, WE CAN STOP BY ANN TAYLOR ON THE WAY HOME.

[FisterRoboto 7499]

Congratulations to HDTGM for being voted one of Vulture's Top Ten Comedy Podcasts of the year!

 

 

I can't really argue with the list in general, as a lot of great shows are represented, but personally, my top five would have been:

 

1) HDTGM

2) The Adventure Zone

3) MBMBaM

4) Pistol Shrimps Radio

5) CBB

SPONTANEANATION would be tied for first in my list. At least it showed up in their list of best episodes. I think mine would go:

 

1) HDTGM / SPONT (tie)

3) DLM

4) CBB

5) Thrilling Adventure Hour (it ended this year, so I have to find a replacement next year, I guess =\ )