Episode 21 — I Know Who Killed Me

[admin 330]

Is Aubrey a piano prodigy or a stripper? Is it all real or a piece of creative writing? Is this the worst movie Lindsay Lohan has ever been in or flat out the worst movie ever? These are just a few of the questions I Know Who Killed Me left us with. Ken Marino is our victim this week and he helps Paul, June, and Jason piece together the plot, characters, and ridiculous symbols that make this horror thriller such a bomb. Enjoy, and be sure to pick up your tickets toHow Did This Get Made? LIVEat Largo on November 15th!

[Julia 477]

Great episode. I love when guests, like Ken, really try to understand these films, even though they're often too terrible to comprehend.
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I'd like to offer a suggestion to the show. I would love to hear a special segment, or episode, where the hosts and guests read short scenes or snippets of dialogue from the film. I think this has somewhat been done in the past when June wants to go over a line that really stuck with her, but I would love to hear more of that in the future. Nothing would please me more than to hear Jason attempting to deliver a Sandra Bullock line from All About Steve or something of that ilk without freaking out or laughing.
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Love the show! Thanks for making me laugh.

[paulscheer 489]

Great Idea. Sometimes it's tough to transcribe (because we are lazy). In the past we have reenacted scenes.

[jarshall 25]

I'm Dan from Toronto, so who was that other guy Paul mentioned?

do I have a twin, Lindsay Lohan style? holy shit.

[Matreyu Hermano 0]

Fucking awesome! This is the first movie I've watched and waited for the podcast and I wasn't disappointed. Cannot wait for the next one! And I hope to see Ken Marino join you again.

[Lando 2019]

Maybe this movie is actually a meta masterpiece in that it's supposed to be shitty to reflect the shitty nature of a high school student's creative writing.

[Fritz 2]

Anyone else question why the recent kidnap / double amputee is on top the entire time while banging her boyfriend?

[CapricaSixSixSix 100]

Jason's anger at these movies never ceases to amaze me.

@Ethan Lindsay probably has that in her contract.

[elliot1326655057 0]

I've listened to every episode, but this was the first movie I've actually watched before listening, and that was probably necessary because I wouldn't have had any idea what the hell you guys were talking about the entire time.

I of course was miserable during the entire viewing experience, so there are many points I could harp on, but what really tore it for me was the revelation that her piano teacher was the killer. Really, her fucking piano teacher?? The guy we saw in ONE scene at the beginning who was such a nothing character that the only thing I remembered about him (and which led me to realize he was the killer) was his bald spot?? Good lord, what an awful twist. It's one step above having your plot be, "And check this out, remember the guy she bumped into at the grocery store who had no lines and made no eye contact with her? That's the killer, dude! Isn't that fucked up and cool??"

[Lando 2019]

The piano teacher reminded me of the creepy EMT from Children's Hospital.

[Grapefruit Simmons 0]

This episode killed me. I was laughing so hard at my desk. I looooove this movie and may or may not have kept it from Netflix for about 16 months...anyone else wonder about Lindsay's decidely unsexy, ratty Ace bandage around her wrist for most of the movie? She had it on even WHILE SHE WAS STRIPPING AND VAGINA SMOKING!

[mrbippers 5]

You didn't touch on the fact that supposedly she was separated at birth from the twin, but then she has memories and the picture of them hanging out at the beach together as young girls.

[MartiniShark 0]

-- This movie was filmed right in the middle of Lohan's shame spiral, and it provides a decent laugh as a result. The scene where they showed her prosthetic leg propped up while attached to a wall charger is revealing. If her SCRAM bracelet was attached to that leg it would explain LiLo's ability to repeatedly get loose and incur more DUI accidents.

-- I thought it was an ill-advised idea for the stadium announcer to declare they were playing that night's game in honor of the recently deceased young girl. Suppose for a moment that the killer was a booster of the team; since they won that game he would be likely inspired to then go ahead and continue killing girls in order for them to have a perfect season.

-- The big reveal of DAD having bought two twins to replace his stillborn child is as asinine as it gets. (Where is this hospital that allows for instant crack-whore adoptions in the neonatal ward?!) I found it hilarious when Dakota arrives he needs to keep silent and play it off that she is Aubrey. So then, he is a skinflint who pays off the mother with a $11 monthly stipend, but he has no problem dropping thousands to have a skank outfitted with state-of-the-art fake limbs.

[jughead 189]

How about this one.....Do you remember when she was just in front of the cemetary and is about to walk in and her "leg" starts beeping like it is low on battery life, she even looks at it like, oh shit! But yet it never dies and she continues to walk on it for the rest of the movie with no issues. Then what the fuck was the purpose of that scene? Shame on Tri-star for even allowing this steaming pile of crap to be released. Seriosuly guys there should be a part 2 to the podcast for this movie becuase there is so much that you guys missed. Also, com'on Paul why did you think that was a dog? She even says at one point, "I don't like cats".

[Bet0nBlack 0]

I can't believe you went that entire show without mentioning the possum in the tiny car. My girlfriend and I nearly lost our minds laughing at the scene where Lohan is sneaking into the piano teacher's cabin, there's a flash of lightning, she gasps in terror and they cut to a possum in a little tiny car. That was seriously the greatest moment of the movie... aside from all the robot hand/leg stuff.

[abacus 8]

soooo... you guys did see the killer in the closet in the alternate ending, right?

 

I wasn't sure because it wasn't mentioned in the end of the podcast. Not that it makes a tiny bit of difference as to the quality/legitimacy of the alternate ending.

[JustinStolle 6]

soooo... you guys did see the killer in the closet in the alternate ending, right? I wasn't sure because it wasn't mentioned in the end of the podcast. Not that it makes a tiny bit of difference as to the quality/legitimacy of the alternate ending.

I watched the alternative ending and was looking directly at the closet and mirror as the door swings open. I didn't even see anything there the first time through. The film is so dark, I'm not surprised if Paul missed it, too. After brightening and sharpening up the image, here's basically what you should have seen in a split second.

 

 

So, what the hell? In this ending, is the whole thing supposed to be Aubrey's story, but there's a real killer? Is that really a person in the closet? Who knows...

[seanotron 2307]

I think that's supposed to be a poster. If it's a mirror it makes no sense, because at the angle it's at it couldn't possibly reflect anyone *in* the closet. Plus the light in the closet is on, why would the killer be cloaked in darkness in a lit area? I mean, this movie is terrible nonsense so it's possible but oi.

[JustinStolle 6]

I think that's supposed to be a poster. If it's a mirror it makes no sense, because at the angle it's at it couldn't possibly reflect anyone *in* the closet. Plus the light in the closet is on, why would the killer be cloaked in darkness in a lit area? I mean, this movie is terrible nonsense so it's possible but oi.

No, the door actually swings open. You see the (possibly CGI) hairless cat run out of the closet and for a moment you see the reflection I posted above. Here's an animation, again with lighting adjustments.

 

[seanotron 2307]

Ahhh okay. I couldn't finish this movie so I missed that. The gif makes more sense. Though the scene itself makes no sense because if it's all just a story why would a killer be in her closet?

[JustinStolle 6]

Ahhh okay. I couldn't finish this movie so I missed that. The gif makes more sense. Though the scene itself makes no sense because if it's all just a story why would a killer be in her closet?

None of it makes sense. This is part of the original extended ending, so at least they realized it didn't belong--it's left up to the viewer I suppose. Maybe she can write characters that come to life like Stranger Than Fiction.

[KokiSuperFairyGodmotherPicos 12]

I took the time to actually watch "I Know Who Killed me". It's a terrible fucking movie, and although she only starred in it I feel myself blaming the entire terrible-ness of this movie all on Lindsay Lohan.

[emdawg 0]

Can I ask how you guys went this whole episode without talking about the Parent Trap? Lindsay Lohan. Playing her own twin. It's right on the nose guys.