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JulyDiaz

Episode 155 - Airborne: LIVE!

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To me, one of the more interesting relationships in the movie was actually between Jack and Augie. These two guys are the living embodiment of brotherly love. They are always springing to the defense of one another. For example, when Augie interrupts Mitchell's speech--and Mitchell walks away muttering some smartass shit under his breath--it's Jack, not Augie who threatens Mitchell. And then, in the hallway when Jack's girlfriend is flirting with Mitchell, it's Augie who threatens to beat up Mitchell! All I can say, it was nice to see those guys having each other's backs like that. It was a beautiful thing.

 

Another thing I found weird about this movie was Mitchell gains the respect of the bullies at his school by pantsing Blaine, and in effect, becoming a bully himself. And, what's even worse, is he does it right after he punks out of a real confrontation with Blaine. Okay, so you back away from a fair fight, but as soon as the dude's back is turned you strike? Great message movie.

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Okay just started rewatching this before the episode as it's been years since I've seen it and listening to the parents sell the main kid on staying with relatives for six months basically makes the kid's point as to why he should be able to go with them to Australia. They argue that they can't remove him from school for six months, so apparently these dumb dildos think that there are no schools in Australia, and now their kid will be more unwilling to adapt to an environment he doesn't want to be in so he's more likely to not make friends or connections with people, unlike Australia where he'd be more apt to embrace local customs and people. Then they say that he gets to see how other people live and broaden his horizons, which I'm sure he would get more of in Australia than in Cincinnati. This leads me to believe after watching how the parents recoiled when the son asked "when are we going," that they FUCKING HATE their son who talks through gritted gameshow host teeth.

 

Also watching the opening credits reminded me what hell it was on my calves rollerblading. Just watching those clasps get locked in just brought back chills and reminders of the blisters if my socks slid down into the blades so then my bare legs were pressed against the ungodly material those devil shoes were made out of. Lastly, the only person I want to see wearing those rose red, circular glasses, is Mickey Knox in Natural Born Killers, not Seth Green in whatever fashion setup he was going for with his beret and frilly leather jacket.

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Okay, much like tomspanks, I also took notes, like some kind of live show nerd. I would type them all up now, but my notebook's juuust out of reach, so I'll lead off with one thing I noticed that both dates and places the film.

 

The hockey playing twins spend all of their time in hockey jerseys - the only figures who actually wear hockey-specific shirts, if I recall - and the costume designer did a bang-up job of figuring out what a hockey kid would wear in Cincinnati in 1993. Both of them are wearing jerseys from the Cincinnati Cyclones, an International League team whose most recent iteration now plays in the ECHL. Here's a picture of the boys in their shirts.

 

airborne-photo-3-black-and-.jpg

 

As you can see, the Cyclones jerseys are fairly memorable, but most importantly, they were only worn by Cincinnati for one season - the 1992/93 season. So, the team was new in town and the costumer stuck the twins in Cyclones jerseys, which were immediately voted as having the worst logo in all of hockey, voted on by The Hockey News. As a result, the Cyclones immediately flipped their logo into one that didn't look like Jason Voorhees caught in a high wind, and, of course, opted for an anthopomorphised cyclone with a stick, missing teeth.

 

Go to the authoritative sportslogos.net for more information:

http://www.sportslog...93/Primary_Logo

 

What I find coolest about this is that it gives us a definitive date and location for this film, all based on the prominent use of two jerseys featuring a failed logo.

 

EDIT: Ooh! And I'm just noticing! In the pic above, they're wearing Cyclones sweatshirts, whereas at school, they're wearing Cyclones hockey jerseys. So, I guess they had a range of stuff for them from the same team store.

 

Also: MOST TWINS DON'T DRESS ALIKE, MOVIE. Particularly not in their teens.

 

I have way more notes but meh, it's a long week.

 

Like many minor league teams, the Cyclones history is a little weird.. They started as an ECHL team playing at the Cincy Gardens. A few years in the owners bought an IHL team, renamed it the Cyclones and moved into Riverfront Coliseum (the scene of The Who concert tragedy, btw). Meanwhile, a different group bought an AHL team and moved into the Gardens. That team was the Cincinnati Mighty Ducks, an affiliate of the NHL team. So for a while Cincy had 2 minor league hockey teams. Eventually the Ducks folded, but so did the entire IHL, which led to the Cyclones owners buying yet another ECHL team.

 

PS, I currently have a collage of pictures of Cincy area landmarks taken around the MLB All Star game from 2015 hanging on my wall taken by the guy who is the current Cyclones mascot, Twister.

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Paul talked about ICON Productions as if they only made "Airborne." ICON is Mel Gibson's production company since 1989, and most recently made "Hacksaw Ridge." Other movies they have made include: "Braveheart", ""The Passion of the Christ", "Apocalypto", and "Mr. Holmes."

 

I was amazed that Paul hadn't heard of Icon. They're one of the few genuinely independantly studios in existence and internally fund all their movies. This movie probably payed for the blood packs in Passion of the Christ.

 

The logo is from one of the most famous and most sacred Byzantine Icons (hence the name), which is almost 1000 years old now I think. Mel Gibson is a wierd old Traditionalist Catholic so he knows all this shit.

snip20150602_57-14DBCA204047CEA710B.png

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Okay the first time Blaine is introduced in this movie is dark as shit for a teen movie in that he basically tries to dance rape Nikki in front of a crowd. It was completed of course with the over the top hair flips and was he dressed like he was going to a snow lodge? It almost seems like he was told that he was the bully in a snow town and he just assumed that meant ski bully. And was I the only one who wanted to beat Mitchell with his laid back, new age guru bullshit while he is also passive aggressively starting shit with everyone? Fuck him in the face.

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Okay, much like tomspanks, I also took notes, like some kind of live show nerd. I would type them all up now, but my notebook's juuust out of reach, so I'll lead off with one thing I noticed that both dates and places the film.

 

The hockey playing twins spend all of their time in hockey jerseys - the only figures who actually wear hockey-specific shirts, if I recall - and the costume designer did a bang-up job of figuring out what a hockey kid would wear in Cincinnati in 1993. Both of them are wearing jerseys from the Cincinnati Cyclones, an International League team whose most recent iteration now plays in the ECHL. Here's a picture of the boys in their shirts.

 

airborne-photo-3-black-and-.jpg

 

As you can see, the Cyclones jerseys are fairly memorable, but most importantly, they were only worn by Cincinnati for one season - the 1992/93 season. So, the team was new in town and the costumer stuck the twins in Cyclones jerseys, which were immediately voted as having the worst logo in all of hockey, voted on by The Hockey News. As a result, the Cyclones immediately flipped their logo into one that didn't look like Jason Voorhees caught in a high wind, and, of course, opted for an anthopomorphised cyclone with a stick, missing teeth.

 

Go to the authoritative sportslogos.net for more information:

http://www.sportslog...93/Primary_Logo

 

What I find coolest about this is that it gives us a definitive date and location for this film, all based on the prominent use of two jerseys featuring a failed logo.

 

EDIT: Ooh! And I'm just noticing! In the pic above, they're wearing Cyclones sweatshirts, whereas at school, they're wearing Cyclones hockey jerseys. So, I guess they had a range of stuff for them from the same team store.

 

Also: MOST TWINS DON'T DRESS ALIKE, MOVIE. Particularly not in their teens.

 

I have way more notes but meh, it's a long week.

 

 

If my hockey bin isn't in storage I'll look through it this weekend. I'm pretty sure I have that copy of the Hockey News.

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So just a few glaring omissions for me.

 

Number one is no one pointing out the fact that Seth Green was channelling Claire Danes from My So Called Life.

 

Also weird was Wiley assuming someone with the name Mitchell Goosen would be an accomplished fighter. Or being upset that Mitchell didn't throw a punch, despite the fact that he wasn't exactly making any effort to defend himself. I can only speculate what June's thoughts on this are vis a vis being a man etc.

 

Or how about that even though Mitchell and Verne Troyers significant other made up, it doesn't address the fact that he's still going to bounce in a few months.

 

All jokes a salad, this episode was the cats meow. Paul had his work cut out for him with the absence of June and Jason and he delivered in spades.

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No one called out Jack Black for being a terrible goalie eithet. It's not like Mitchell wasn't telegraphing the shot he was about to take.

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No one called out Jack Black for being a terrible goalie eithet. It's not like Mitchell wasn't telegraphing the shot he was about to take.

 

 

Puck was dropped, Augie looked like he was blowing kisses to the crowd. Always square to the puck!

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Okay just started rewatching this before the episode as it's been years since I've seen it and listening to the parents sell the main kid on staying with relatives for six months basically makes the kid's point as to why he should be able to go with them to Australia. They argue that they can't remove him from school for six months, so apparently these dumb dildos think that there are no schools in Australia, and now their kid will be more unwilling to adapt to an environment he doesn't want to be in so he's more likely to not make friends or connections with people, unlike Australia where he'd be more apt to embrace local customs and people. Then they say that he gets to see how other people live and broaden his horizons, which I'm sure he would get more of in Australia than in Cincinnati. This leads me to believe after watching how the parents recoiled when the son asked "when are we going," that they FUCKING HATE their son who talks through gritted gameshow host teeth.

 

Such a simple fix for this movie: Parents go to a third world country, or some remote jungle or warzone or something. They literally told their son "we're going to a wealthy country that speaks the same language so you have to go to Ohio". I think the parents are into some dodgy shit and they're abandoning him. They're actually off for a sex tour of Thailand.

 

If that kid would have gone to Australia for school I can tell you that as soon as he said any of his idiotic fake surfer dude shit he would have the living shit beaten out of him and the movie would be over in 3 minutes.

 

Again I will repeat however, there are no schools in Australia.

I learned to read from the books that wash up on the shore now and then.

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Also I looked and the Texas Realtor's paintings are basically just cafe/doctors surgery/office wall art. Most of them are actually stylised copies of Van Gogh paintings.

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In defense of Mitchell's parents, maybe it's not so much that there are no schools in Australia, but that they were planning on living Dian Fossey-style amongst the wombats in "the Bush" (is that correct my Australian brethren?)

 

In their attempt to get the wombats to accept them as one of their own, they couldn't exactly have their air headed teenage son blundering about barefoot defining what "stylin'" is to the local koala population, could they?

 

Of course, a line of dialog or two to clear this up probably would have been helpful...

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In further defense of Mitchell's parents, I assumed the whole issue with him not going is because of the Australian school schedule. I mean this movie seemingly takes place over winter as we know from the Christmas tree in his parents house and the snow. Given that American schools finish in June he'd just miss the last half of his school year including graduation. Now when he goes to Australia it's their summer. I believe that their school year runs all year starting in January and ending in December, but what if the six month study ends before the school year there does? He might be stuck in some kind of graduation limbo. Not to mention the questions raised about can he graduate from a school in Australia? Does he have the right credits? Is there some class he needs to graduate which he might be missing? Maybe things like Spanish and American history are very important to the parents but not covered in the Australian curriculum. There are so many moving parts I think his parents did the right thing not to send him to school in Australia.

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In defense of Mitchell's parents, maybe it's not so much that there are no schools in Australia, but that they were planning on living Dian Fossey-style amongst the wombats in "the Bush" (is that correcy my Australian brethren?)

 

In their attempt to get the wombats to accept them as one of their own, they couldn't exactly have their air headed teenage son blundering about barefoot defining what "stylin'" is to the local koala population, could they?

 

Of course, a line of dialog or two to clear this up probably would have been helpful...

Yes, your use of 'bush' is correct - much better than the always-incorrectly-used 'outback'. The thing is, wombats don't live in crazy arid or deserty or isolated areas: they live mostly in Queensland and New South Wales, in fairly temperate locations, so Mitchell would likely have a great time.

The main habitat for the Common Wombat is the temperate forest-covered areas of southeastern Australia. The species tends to avoid rainforests and is often found in the mountainous areas. In southern Queensland and northern New South Wales it is found only in sclerophyll forest above 600 m. In South Australia and Tasmania it also occurs at lower altitudes in more open vegetation – woodland, coastal scrub and heathland. Wombats prefer to dig their main shelters on slopes above creeks and gullies, and feed in grassy clearings.

Source

In further defense of Mitchell's parents, I assumed the whole issue with him not going is because of the Australian school schedule. I mean this movie seemingly takes place over winter as we know from the Christmas tree in his parents house and the snow. Given that American schools finish in June he'd just miss the last half of his school year including graduation. Now when he goes to Australia it's their summer. I believe that their school year runs all year starting in January and ending in December, but what if the six month study ends before the school year there does? He might be stuck in some kind of graduation limbo. Not to mention the questions raised about can he graduate from a school in Australia? Does he have the right credits? Is there some class he needs to graduate which he might be missing? Maybe things like Spanish and American history are very important to the parents but not covered in the Australian curriculum. There are so many moving parts I think his parents did the right thing not to send him to school in Australia.

As an Australian currently living in Canada but seriously considering relocating my family back to Australia later this year, I can attest that this is a consideration, but not a roadblock. Australian schools have a different schedule, yes, so there'd be some adjustment, but the number of American kids who showed up in my high school for a term or two because their dads were in the state to work on the mines (okay, there were two. Two American kids) suggests that this isn't so hard. Of course, they were social outcasts because of their accents and silly phrases, but generally they did fine academically.

 

I think the problem for the zoology parents was the cost: they had a grant to go learn all about the wombats, as though they can't do that on the internet (oh right, 1993, sorry) and as though there aren't LEGIONS of Australian scientists who know everything about the wombat, so what are these two knuckleheads going to contribute? I think they've said, 'well, we've looked at the numbers, and it costs a ton to fly to Australia, so if we don't bring the kid, we'll suddenly have all this financial flexibility and it'll be just as if the condom never broke sixteen years ago, oh Larry, just think of the freedom!"

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Oh. And I should point this out.

 

When Mrs. Poole from Valerie slash the Secretary from Ferris Bueller says to Mitchell that she's had word from Mitchell's parents, and that he's caught 'poison oak' in Australia, everyone takes this at face value.

 

BUT POISON OAK IS A NORTH AMERICAN PLANT.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toxicodendron_diversilobum

 

So what if Mitchell's parents NEVER went to Australia? What if they're just so sick of this bonehead that they made up this story, packed him off to Ohio, and are now living the life of key parties and binge drinking with Dog Dog?

 

The idea of them going to Australia in the first place (wombats) is pretty flimsy, and their ruse is immediately spoiled by trying to embellish too much (poison oak). I want to see the reverse sequel, where Mom and Dad pretend to go to Australia only to breathe a sigh of relief and get up to all kinds of hijinks with Dog Dog.

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i didn't get a chance to listen to the highlander 2 episode till yesterday and i only watched airborne last night and about half way through it i couldn't help but feel i enjoyed highlander 2 more than this borefest. but i stayed with it and when i got to the never-ending race scene the thing that popped into my head was that the music used for the devils backbone scene was similarly awful to the music used in the subway scene in highlander 2. i just thought it was a funny coincidence but Scott blew my mind when he said that the music in this movie was composed by Stewart Copeland .. who also composed the music in highlander 2!

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and another thing about the race. why didn't the filmakers make the kids wear some sort of team colours? i honestly had no clue who was racing who. just give them different colour helmets or something. they all wore different shirts and as soon as they put on their helmets and goggles they became indistinguishable from each other. at one stage when they were streamlining so i thought they were on the same team, then they started fighting each other so i though "oh no wait, they're competing with each other?!?" and then they .... ah forget it ... this movie sucked

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but i loved the episode. paul and the 3 guest were hilarious. i only relistened to the gigli episode the other day and i loved Danielle in it and all 3 brought their A-game for this one. i loved Kumail trying to describe the own goal "he does an own goal ... he goals the wrong goal .. "

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As an Australian currently living in Canada but seriously considering relocating my family back to Australia later this year, I can attest that this is a consideration, but not a roadblock. Australian schools have a different schedule, yes, so there'd be some adjustment, but the number of American kids who showed up in my high school for a term or two because their dads were in the state to work on the mines (okay, there were two. Two American kids) suggests that this isn't so hard. Of course, they were social outcasts because of their accents and silly phrases, but generally they did fine academically.

Oh dear. I'm sorry my home country has let you down. Oh behalf of Canada, I'm sorry.

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Surely the explanation for the title Airborne is that Mitchell Goosen is mentally airborne - he has his head in the clouds, he's always daydreaming about surfing and being back in California. So when people complain he learnt nothing, surely he realised that with the love of a good woman (or teenage girl in this case) he found his feet back on the ground and realised that life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. The tagline then should say "Mitchell Goosen was Airborne when he landed in Cincinnati, but it took a special girl and zany sidekick to bring him back down to earth".

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Oh dear. I'm sorry my home country has let you down. Oh behalf of Canada, I'm sorry.

Oh no, I love Canada - my kids are Canadian, so am I now. We just want to go back to Australia for a bit to give the kids a chance to spend some time with their grandparents before they get too old (both kids and grandparents). We'll be back in Toronto, 100%.

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Damn CakeBug, you are winning on all fronts, and on a panoply of topics. Well done.

 

 

Thanks Quasar! I have a list of other things to bring up later on too - I don't want to use them all at once!

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Oh no, I love Canada - my kids are Canadian, so am I now. We just want to go back to Australia for a bit to give the kids a chance to spend some time with their grandparents before they get too old (both kids and grandparents). We'll be back in Toronto, 100%.

That's good to hear. I think it's a great idea too. Now back to more Airborne!

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