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RyanSz

Geostorm (2017)

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A movie that is basically the weather dominator storyline of GI Joe starring HDTGM All-Star Gerard Butler, after seeing the satellite system that basically makes the sky clear and that's it now being used by an unknown villain I knew that this would be perfect for the show.

 

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Oh my god I saw this last night and honestly this would be PERFECT for the podcast. It's ridiculous in all the best ways and Gerard Butler has become a HDTGM all-star.

 

10/10 would recommend.

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The directorial debut of Roland Emmerich's longtime collaborator, Dean Devlin. Reshoots were done by "Judge Dredd" filmmaker Danny Cannon as well as Jerry Bruckheimer, which prompts this movie to finally come out 3 years after production wrapped!

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The directorial debut of Roland Emmerich's longtime collaborator, Dean Devlin.

Omg so THAT'S why we have some direct scene copies from The Day After Tomorrow lol.

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What's the biggest issue with this film? Was it the rough production?

 

Warner Bros., Skydance's 'Geostorm' Undergoes Reshoots, Brings on Jerry Bruckheimer

http://www.hollywood...ckheimer-866329

 

Or was it the science?

 

Geostorm's Weather Control Tech Is Exceptionally Bogus, Scientists Explain

https://gizmodo.com/...ogus-1819783644

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Personally, it was Gerard Butler talking too damn much lol.

Ha! If that's not career damnation, I don't know what is. Amazing that this movie is somehow faring better on Rotten Tomatoes than Fassbender's The Snowman. We're talking 11% vs. 8%, but I'm trying to at least give it some credit.

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Ha! If that's not career damnation, I don't know what is. Amazing that this movie is somehow faring better on Rotten Tomatoes than Fassbender's The Snowman. We're talking 11% vs. 8%, but I'm trying to at least give it some credit.

Oh yeah I noticed that Friday morning! Idk what the hell happened with The Snowman but a friend of mine saw it and said it was one of the worst of the year!

 

At least with Geostorm people should know what they're getting into. I mean can anyone really see just the trailer and the name of the director and think it's going to be a genuinely good movie???

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At least with Geostorm people should know what they're getting into. I mean can anyone really see just the trailer and the name of the director and think it's going to be a genuinely good movie???

Maybe that's the biggest knock against The Snowman. People had higher hopes with Fassbender and some other legit actors attached and it failed so miserably. The more I read about it, the more I want to see it. Maybe the crew can do a weather-themed back-to-back episode with these two pieces of garbage.

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Maybe that's the biggest knock against The Snowman. People had higher hopes with Fassbender and some other legit actors attached and it failed so miserably. The more I read about it, the more I want to see it. Maybe the crew can do a weather-themed back-to-back episode with these two pieces of garbage.

I just remembered the German character in Geostorm is named Fassbinder and that's more evidence that these movies are tied together somehow.

 

SHARED UNIVERSE!

 

During one of the massive snowstorms caused by the satellites people become terrorized by a serial killer taking advantage of the harsh weather.

 

Or this is a Jacob's Ladder situation in which I actually died at some point and none of these movies are real.

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I can't wait to see this (and The Snowman) when they Redbox drop, but man was this bad timing. After the trailer played before It, I overheard a lot of unhappy murmuring.

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All I could think as I left the theatre was "I can't believe it's not Micheal Bay!"

 

Actor playing the brother is utterly worthless and the brotherly dynamic had ZERO chemistry.

 

I laughed when they actually used the word Geostorm and kept laughing harder and harder every time it was said as the movie went on.

 

The science was exceptionally bad from start to finish. The scene in beijing or whatever with the ground erupting in fire springs to mind... Dude is racing again fiery fissures in the road down the fucking coast! So 10 feet away from this mile long magma eruption is what appears to be fairly deep water. On one side of this the absurdly linear, mile long magma eruption is perfectly fine, unaffected sea water. On the other side is and entire city of skyscrappers collapsing from the whatever-it-is..... kk

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I mean, it's Gerard Butler bombing natural disasters with satellites. It looks amazing.

 

The IMDB Description:

When the network of satellites designed to control the global climate starts to attack Earth, it's a race against the clock to uncover the real threat before a worldwide Geostorm wipes out everything and everyone.

 

MV5BMTA0OTQwMTIxNzheQTJeQWpwZ15BbWU4MDQ1MzI3OTMy._V1_.jpg

 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cxQE7EeqNM

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Having just watched this glorious piece of shit I now fully endorse it being covered by the show. For a split second I thought that Roland Emmerich had made this, but upon seeing that Dean Devlin was in the director's chair as well as the writer and producer, I realized he was just making what I assume Roland Emmerich describes as porn. It's as if he thought "let's see if I can make a movie with a heavier handed climate message than The Day After Tomorrow" and then succeeded on EVERY SINGLE FRONT of that. While the science is shitty, at least it's dumbed down enough to a basic rock-paper-scissors logic to seem plausible enough for this film.

 

The one thing I am bummed about is that it wasn't revealed in the end that Butler was the bad guy behind the whole thing, because that twist not only could have made this movie an instant B-movie classic, but would have been better hid than the Law and Order-esque way the Big Bad was revealed in how there were only so many known name actors in the film that i had to be one of them. Also at one point Butler proclaims that his brother and he were born in the UK but raised in the US, and if he isn't pulling his full-on Scottish accent while the brother has a full American accent, then someone has got to be fucking kidding me.

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I think SNL mentioned it this weekend, so this is in no way my own...there was something else shitty that shared this name, and it was the 90's car called the Geo Storm.

 

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Yeah I've seen those from time to time and they are utter pieces of this, unlike this film which is a great piece of shit.

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Live show next week!

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

YYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I wanted to love this movie, it had so many elements I love, but there was a really gross thing I noticed afterward that bummed me out.

All the areas decimated by the weather dominator were non-white, I think the only white place was Moscow. And when it finally targeted the US it hit Orlando. :/

Even Day After Tomorrow was like, buh-bye Europe, also we maybe killed the Queen of England.

 

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I wanted to love this movie, it had so many elements I love, but there was a really gross thing I noticed afterward that bummed me out.

All the areas decimated by the weather dominator were non-white, I think the only white place was Moscow. And when it finally targeted the US it hit Orlando. :/

Even Day After Tomorrow was like, buh-bye Europe, also we maybe killed the Queen of England.

 

Well it kinda makes sense in that

Ed Harris was doing it to take out what he felt were America's top threats and past national enemies along with the line of succession in order for him to become President, hence the attack on Orlando where the bulk of the Presidential cabinet was. Also knowing how non-subtle Dean Devlin is, he was going for the most polarizing combinations of weather destruction/location he could think of.

 

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Well it kinda makes sense in that

Ed Harris was doing it to take out what he felt were America's top threats and past national enemies along with the line of succession in order for him to become President, hence the attack on Orlando where the bulk of the Presidential cabinet was. Also knowing how non-subtle Dean Devlin is, he was going for the most polarizing combinations of weather destruction/location he could think of.

 

I suppose, like I remember

the decision to take out Russia because they wouldn't play ball, I probably zoned out on the reasoning for the rest. It still seems odd to have held the DNC in Orlando though.

 

This movie had Robert Sheehan and it still did nothing for me, that is a sin!

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I suppose, like I remember

the decision to take out Russia because they wouldn't play ball, I probably zoned out on the reasoning for the rest. It still seems odd to have held the DNC in Orlando though.

 

This movie had Robert Sheehan and it still did nothing for me, that is a sin!

Maybe they should hold the DNC there, I mean it has Disneyworld AND Universal Studios Orlando.

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Maybe they should hold the DNC there, I mean it has Disneyworld AND Universal Studios Orlando.

Maybe they're holding off going to Orlando until Nintendo Land opens at Universal. That's my excuse.

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This was so bad, my wife suggested it for "that podcast you make me listen to about bad movies."

 

That is one hell of an endorsement for this show. Our relationship has been shaky ever since I made her watch Rhinestone and then relive it by listening to the podcast. She considers it double torture.

 

 

I couldn't stop shaking my head during this movie.

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