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JulyDiaz

Episode 168 - Hard Ticket to Hawaii: LIVE!

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HDTGM All-stars Andrea Savage (I’m Sorry) and Karen Kilgariff (My Favorite Murder) joins Paul and Jason to discuss the 1987 action thriller Hard Ticket to Hawaii. Recorded live from Largo at the Coronet in Los Angeles, they talk about serious conversations in hot tubs, blowing up skateboarders with bazookas, throwing nunchucks, and getting messages in sandwiches delivered by a sushi restaurant.

 

Check out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/user/howdidthisgetmade

Where to Find Jason, June & Paul:

Paul’s new comedy Drive Share is available on Go90. Paul can be seen on Veep. You can see June and Paul on NTSF:SD:SUV:: on HULU. June stars in Grace and Frankie on Netflix, as well as Lady Dynamite alongside with Jason.

Jason can be seen in The House, The Lego Batman Movie, How to Be Single, Sleeping with Other People, and is still indeed in The Dictator.

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So glad this movie was covered as I'd seen the skateboard scene many times but had no idea where it was from. I had a hard time remembering any character’s name, so eventually I paired things down to Blonde #1 and #2 and Dumb Dildo Ryu and Ken (plus Sports Dildo).

 

I have a lot of sympathy for the snake. Imagine the life it lead prior to when we first see it. It was either born into captivity or it was cruelly taken from its home and/or a possible family to a medical research facility, to be injected with who knows what and given rat cancer. Each day must feel like eternity until one miraculous moment when a shipping error finds the snake in a tropical paradise. It's free, maybe for the first time ever. Alone, except for the memories of how it suffered at the hands of men, lamenting the life it never and will never have, slowing dying of cancer. The snake eventually comes across the happy honeymooning couple, which represent everything that has been taken away from it. Maybe it's hunger, or instinct, or just an emotional lapse, but it kills them. Its life force ebbing away, the snake finds a cool dark place to rest in and die (the pipe under the women’s bungalow). Does it dream while it settles here? I would assume there would be nothing but nightmares. Perhaps awakening from and trying to flee these nightmares, it bursts up through the toilet, but the snake sees its reflection in the mirror, the haggard specter staring back causes the snake to have another breakdown, shattering the mirror and trashing the bathroom.

Pathetically the snake crawls toward Blonde #2 begging for release from this hell. It sees the smuggler jerk from earlier who had tried to hurt it, recognizes that he wants to harm this woman, and kills him not just for his transgressions against the snake but to save the snake's unlikely saviors. Having helped someone in its final moments the snake finds peace and is ready to truly be free. Unfortunately, the woman shoots the snake non-fatally in the face twice before it is blown up by Dumb Dildo Ken’s rocket launcher. That's your hard ticket to Hawaii.

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68zU7vx.gif

 

it's one of the most bizarre things i've seen in a while .. a grown man wearing ugly assed shorts doing skateboard tricks in hawaii whilst holding a gun in one hand and a blow up doll in the other ... not to mention all the stuff that came before and after ... HDTGM indeed

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1. This would not have been a good one for June. Wise move to sit it out.

2. I never watch it, but I want to see this Family Feud episode. Steve Harvey sucks.

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Why did Jade fist fight the bad guy? The heroes had no compunction about killing, so why not just have Rowdy shoot him? Was there a vendetta we didn't see? Or was it that Rowdy was THAT bad a shot?

 

When Edy changes to pick up the guys (for no good reason) why the cut aways to the girl in the pool in the whIte swimsuit? I expected something to happen, but nothing. Not even some trademark Sidaris boobs.

 

Did Stephen Segal pattern himself after Jade?

 

When do we see a remake with Rob Heubel as Rowdy?

 

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I'm only a few minutes into the podcast but calling this a feminist movie as they do makes me legit angry. Just passing the Bechdel test doesn't make a movie pro women. Just having the women be badasses doesn't make it pro women.

 

The scene that bothered me the most, beyond the "you practically raped me" line, is the scene where the woman held hostage is strung up and tortured with a whip. It immediately cuts to a man having an orgasm so their screams blend together.

 

On one hand, I'm glad June didn't have to watch this but I wish she had to take everyone to task.

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I'm only a few minutes into the podcast but calling this a feminist movie as they do makes me legit angry. Just passing the Bechdel test doesn't make a movie pro women. Just having the women be badasses doesn't make it pro women.

 

The scene that bothered me the most, beyond the "you practically raped me" line, is the scene where the woman held hostage is strung up and tortured with a whip. It immediately cuts to a man having an orgasm so their screams blend together.

 

On one hand, I'm glad June didn't have to watch this but I wish she had to take everyone to task.

This this this this this

 

giphy.gif

 

A movie that passes the Bechdel Test is not automatically good for women. Remember that EVERY TWILIGHT MOVIE PASSES. Think about that.

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I wanted them to talk about Rowdy and Jade doing racist impressions of Bruce Lee while half assedly doing martial arts sparring on a boat at the beginning.

 

Also everyone on Molokai except for the cops at the beginning and one henchman are white. I know the movie was made in different time but it was Hawaii 5-0ing PoC hard.

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I thought "Hard Ticket" referred to it being a hard way to get to visit Hawaii. As in Taryn probably thought it was going to be an easy assignment to a wonderful part of the world but instead she ended up chasing murderous drug dealers and running from contaminated snakes on a former leper colony

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Do airplanes typically land on golf courses? Do they pull into parking lots like normal cars would?

 

I'm not familiar with the vagaries of small aircraft.

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Donna says that there has never been a snake on the island but for some reason there were 2 snakes in the warehouse that day. we're told one, a healthy one, was going to the wildlife park for display. but what's the plan with the second one. where were they delivering the deadly contaminated snake to? and why would you risk sending a deadly diseased snake anywhere when you know it's going to be dead in a couple of days. just leave it where it is and let it die and then get rid of it.

 

there was so much work went in to get that snake into the house just so they could make a crappy jaws pun and blow it's head off with a rocket. the whole snake plot was completely unnecessary .. but totally worth it!

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Do airplanes typically land on golf courses? Do they pull into parking lots like normal cars would?

 

I'm not familiar with the vagaries of small aircraft.

you should ask an experienced pilot like, i dunno ... say ..

 

170px-Harrison_Ford_Cannes.jpg

 

i'm pretty sure this whole movie was filmed on a golf course over the quite season. there's nearly always a bunker or two in the background

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I found this podcast hard to listen to; Paul seemed more confused and befuddled than normally. ...plus neither guest, including Jason, ever completed a thought or spoke in full sentences.

Also this movie was just terrible.

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This this this this this

 

giphy.gif

 

A movie that passes the Bechdel Test is not automatically good for women. Remember that EVERY TWILIGHT MOVIE PASSES. Think about that.

I came here to make a similar point after they mentioned it early in the episode, but I should have known you and grudlian would be on the case already :)

 

(Someone in the previous ep thread called the thoroughly problematic last movie "feminist" because it passed the Bechdel Test, too)

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I'm only a few minutes into the podcast but calling this a feminist movie as they do makes me legit angry. Just passing the Bechdel test doesn't make a movie pro women. Just having the women be badasses doesn't make it pro women.

 

The scene that bothered me the most, beyond the "you practically raped me" line, is the scene where the woman held hostage is strung up and tortured with a whip. It immediately cuts to a man having an orgasm so their screams blend together.

 

On one hand, I'm glad June didn't have to watch this but I wish she had to take everyone to task.

 

I think it was a pretty obvious joke that they were referring to this movie as "feminist" based solely on the Bechdel test.

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I came here to make a similar point after they mentioned it early in the episode, but I should have known you and grudlian would be on the case already :)

 

(Someone in the previous ep thread called the thoroughly problematic last movie "feminist" because it passed the Bechdel Test, too)

 

But without the Bechdel Test, how can I - a simple man - know when a female character is being exploited or being otherwise treated like garbage? It's almost like you're asking me to be a discerning viewer...Do you really expect me to turn off my lizard brain and view women as equals and not like masturbatory aids?

 

All I know is that this movie had two topless women in a jacuzzi not talking about a man, and therefore, they must possess agency and strength. Obviously, this was what the director had in mind when he shot this scene. I mean, as long as they weren't touching each other's breasts everything is cool, right?

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This movie is a gem. I wanted to submit these illuminating Andy Sidaris quotes (he also refers to a never-made sequel to Hard Ticket called BattleZone Hawaii):

 

Why he shot in Hawaii: "A lot of people think it’s cute to work 20 hour days, but it’s not, it’s stupid. The dumbest thing I’ve ever seen in my life was watching Cast Away, which is a terrific picture with Tom Hanks. However they went to some small island that they had to take a hundred boats to get to every morning. They had to leave at 3 in the morning to get there at 5am. Then they’d wade to shore where they built a little city with toilets and things. They could have gone to Molakai! We were shooting on the golf course. We’d be in the “jungle” and turn around and there was the country club! Two hundred yards out from the hotel, there were mountains and the ocean. Meanwhile, they went to some little island. It’s absolutely stupid to take a crew down there and risk their lives every morning."

https://www.bristolb...-b-film-series/

 

"We've never shown anything below the waist, and we don't do any bumping and grinding or any of that crap. We just do a little bit of sexy stuff. I like our pictures, because they're nice little adventure pictures. They're not mean-spirited, and I think you know that. In our movies, we don't put a knife to some girl's throat and say "We're gonna cut your t*** off, or cut your throat." We don't do crap like that. We have a family atmosphere, we pay well, and we pay on time."

 

http://www.digitally...rview.php?ID=50

 

What are your future plans?: "Arlene and I have taken a hiatus in order to get up to speed on our company and our ongoing projects. We are now ready to get back into production. I’ve written a pretty exciting outline for BattleZone Hawaii with all the usual ingredients; many exotic locations, fabulous explosions, extraordinarily beautiful Playboy Playmates and Penthouse Pets, extremely handsome men; some of whom can’t shoot straight but their hearts are in the right place and, most importantly, the snake that was killed in Hard Ticket to Hawaii, laid an egg prior to its death. This egg is hatched and just like its mother this huge, cancerous-infected python is mad as hell!!! Wow! I can’t wait to see this movie."

http://www.mediaorch...s-andy-sidaris/

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I came here to make a similar point after they mentioned it early in the episode, but I should have known you and grudlian would be on the case already :)/>

 

(Someone in the previous ep thread called the thoroughly problematic last movie "feminist" because it passed the Bechdel Test, too)

Aww shucks

 

I know going into these movies what we're getting into and, for the most part, I'm fine with it to an extent. If someone even wants to excuse it with, "hey, it's a low budget, 80s action movie... what do you expect?" or "it was a long time ago. We didn't know better," I'm fine with that too. But to say this is a feminist movie, get real. Paul and Jason know better and I'm assuming the guests hosts do too.

 

If you're going into one of these clearly misogynist movies, they can either address the elephant in the room or gloss over it. Don't call the elephant the opposite of an elephant though.

 

I like them mentioning some of the problems upfront and throughout. Talking down the "practically rape" director or written by a fifth grader. That's a better way to address it than Chopping Mall. So, there's some progress.

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I think it was a pretty obvious joke that they were referring to this movie as "feminist" based solely on the Bechdel test.

Maybe. But after them sounding somewhat serious about Ninja Terminator being one of their most feminist movies, I want to nip any potential in the bud.

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