Freja 1290 Posted May 16, 2014 What were they doing in Norway/Sweden/Finland/OtherNordicCountry Well, it was in New Hampshire, where I was attending school at the time. You see, not all of us are born with that certain kind of *magic* like Hayes and Sean were. They just showed up in LA and fuckin BOOM they were rich, famous, and big-dicked. But for the rest of us normals, we have to put on a fuggin uniform and work nights at a dead airport where the only thing we have to look forward to is the 15 minute break that our managers discourage us from taking (despite that being illegal) so we can eat our tupperware dinner in the break room and listen to this guy named Tony tell everyone that you're a bitch because you rolled your eyes at him once and he will never let that shit go. Never. I'm not sure why Jared came to NH. Dean was there because it was primary season and he was the chairman of the DNC at the time. 6 Share this post Link to post
gototimsvlogdotnet 2886 Posted May 17, 2014 edit: yup. Two guys on the left: Michael Ian Black and that dude from lost? Then front and center is Dr "Dick" Tightjeans, and then Dr Perky-Tits (she's a strong woman so she didn't fully change her name from Monica Perky when she married Harold Tits also they're in an open relationship so there's still lots of sex scenes with her). 3 Share this post Link to post
Joe McGurl 8358 Posted May 17, 2014 edit: yup. *Suit Guy's inner monologue* Ugh. As the Hospital administrator here, I can't BELIEVE that these assholes I hired seem so unprepared and surprised that they're working for the night shift that almost all of them have showed up to work in street clothes and jeans. Hey, the two black guys are in scrubs and seem like they know what they're doing...that counts, I guess. And at least they ALL had time to grab their stethoscopes though, so, that's a relief.Also, does one patient really need 7 people to be guided down the hallway? Who knows? I'll just stand here, silently disapproving and judging with my arms folded across my chest. THAT will show them. 3 Share this post Link to post
mwn 5470 Posted May 17, 2014 I'm not sure why Jared came to NH. He, uh, *points to location <---* came to see me...??? Sorry gang, was hoping to parlay this fortuitous loc. ment. into something better. *shrugs with the weight of one thousand burdens* 3 Share this post Link to post
greggy 15909 Posted May 17, 2014 went and saw a movie tonite...i learn the hard way, dont stop reading the movie title after three letters like i did, i heard from my pastor there was a good christian movie out there so i read GOD and didnt look any farther so instead of seeing a movie about a kid who dies and goes to heaven i saw a thing about a dinosaur monster 11 Share this post Link to post
gototimsvlogdotnet 2886 Posted May 17, 2014 Hey Narnold: I have a BMW, a Porsche, a MonsterTruck, a house, and 30 companies. S**k my d**k! 10 Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted May 17, 2014 Hey Narnold: I have a BMW, a Porsche, a MonsterTruck, a house, and 30 companies. S**k my d**k! lolol. can someone please remind which episode this is again?? also -- what happened to the live episodes?? Share this post Link to post
Andrew 4646 Posted May 17, 2014 I have a BMW, a Porsche, a MonsterTruck, a house, and 30 companies. S**k my d**k! lolol. can someone please remind which episode this is again?? Ep #38 - I Have 30 Companies (Jon Gabrus) 2 Share this post Link to post
xoValeriexo 4369 Posted May 17, 2014 Showshowbro – I don’t know Eli Braden personally, no, I’m just a fan. We’re friends on fb though, which is more than I can say about some of the people on these forums, ya know? He’s responsible for a lot of songs that are on Stern. I don’t listen to that show, but I’ve heard a lot of his songs and they’re ridiculously good and funny. Tim Treese – Thank-you! Honlads isn’t my bff anymore, now it’s you! Michael Bay of Pigs – My Tumblr name is a little scary: genuinehorror.tumblr.com Hope I didn’t give you the willies. Here’s the link to the House of Cards thing specifically: http://genuinehorror.tumblr.com/day/2014/02/20/ AndyKneis – Yeah, I’ve written quite a few specs, but I’m not 100% comfortable with formatting and story structure yet. Your Parks & Rec spec is really good. Super funny! Obviously (from the presence of Mark), it’s an old spec. What have you written recently? I’ve decided to just put a bunch of my writing online, so you can all choose what you want to read. I have multiple specs (Comedy Bang! Bang!, Girls, and Workaholics) and sketches here now: http://www.scribd.com/ValerieBryant 8 Share this post Link to post
burdrulz 1760 Posted May 17, 2014 girlfriends complaining about trying to 'reset their keychain passwords' makes it hard to read the forums. sho sho bro, consider yourself lucky 1 Share this post Link to post
agata 2789 Posted May 17, 2014 wow you guys (andy and valerie) are really impressive with all your specs and your writing stuff and i'm just over here trying not to burn a frozen pizza in the oven ( at least i've learned it's not just putting it in at 400 degrees and falling asleep for 8 hours). 9 Share this post Link to post
Andrew 4646 Posted May 17, 2014 Burdrulz, what do you have against Bill Bur? Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted May 18, 2014 girlfriends complaining about trying to 'reset their keychain passwords' makes it hard to read the forums. sho sho bro, consider yourself lucky ugh yea, tell me about it -- she's all -- why are you out of breath?? have you been pretending to take out the recycling so you can make out with hawt ass chicks in the alley??!? and i'm all -- noOOoo BAabe. Baby? Babe -- I saw a raccoon and it was scary. i totally don't miss her -- even though she was a steady eightum (i still don't need forum girlfriends tho so don get any ideas.) 6 Share this post Link to post
gototimsvlogdotnet 2886 Posted May 18, 2014 Hey guys I couldn't donate any money this month (just bought a sick jet ski cash only) so my donation is a song. I made you guys a song to play to explain the Popcorn Gallery to guests. I worked really hard on it so definitely please use it. And please not in post... Please use it live so the guest can hear it too I think it will actually SAVE us all time. https://drive.google...dit?usp=sharing EDIT: And before anyone asks... No I actually haven't been classically trained as a singer! My church just says I have a knack for being on key. Too much talent in one body! Thanks the Lord Jesus Christ for my blessings! 6 Share this post Link to post
greggy 15909 Posted May 18, 2014 one time when i was a little boy i was taking a bag of trash out when it was dark so i wanted to get back in very fast so i ran to the can, wound my arm up to throw the bag in and while i released it i saw inside the can there was a family of possums checking out our leavings so i had a split second to flip my sh*t before the trash can went crazy 9 Share this post Link to post
kneisage 2108 Posted May 18, 2014 /!\ Long post below BEWARE /!\ one time when i was a little boy i was taking a bag of trash out when it was dark so i wanted to get back in very fast so i ran to the can, wound my arm up to throw the bag in and while i released it i saw inside the can there was a family of possums checking out our leavings so i had a split second to flip my sh*t before the trash can went crazy One time when I was also a little boy I was walking through some ivy in a friend's backyard and I stepped on some kind beehive (wasp nest?) buried underground, and I was a dumb child so I figured if I didn't move, the bees would leave me alone, but turns out I just made myself an easy target and they stung me a whole bunch. Finally I started running and my friend's mom was standing there with a hose and she sprayed me with the hose to get the bees off. Then my mom drove me to the hospital but I was ok. The End. AndyKneis – Yeah, I’ve written quite a few specs, but I’m not 100% comfortable with formatting and story structure yet. Your Parks & Rec spec is really good. Super funny! Obviously (from the presence of Mark), it’s an old spec. What have you written recently? I’ve decided to just put a bunch of my writing online, so you can all choose what you want to read. I have multiple specs (Comedy Bang! Bang!, Girls, and Workaholics) and sketches here now: http://www.scribd.com/ValerieBryant Thanks! I really appreciate it. I haven't had a chance to look at all of these yet but your Comedy Bang! Bang! script is hilarious, nice job. I hadn't even considered that for a spec but it seems like a good show for a writer to show off sketches and jokes since it's crammed so full of bits. You take full advantage of that which is awesome. Also I love Workaholics and Girls so I'm psyched to see your take on them. As for me, writing Podcast: The Musical took a loooong time and now trying to find people I know who can sing/act who might want to be in it has been taking up a lot of time but also it's been fun since it's always sort of been my dream to write a musical. Maybe some day it'll happen! I've also been working on some sketches that some friends might help me shoot, but other than that, I'm still trying to figure out what my next big project is going to be. I've considered writing another spec, but I'm not sure what to do with it once it's done. Do you send it to talent agencies or like, hand it off to a friend in the biz? Corner M. Night Shyamalan at the dry cleaners? I've considered trying to pitch more articles to members of the Earwolf family: Cracked.com (I did a few for them http://www.cracked.c...mbers/kneisage/) because they always get a ton of hits, but Cracked is very particular about the kinds of articles they accept and it requires a good amount of research and effort to get an article accepted so I have to make sure I've got the energy to hop back into that process. VB, if you or anyone else is interested in pitching to them let me know. I can give a few pointers. So yeah who knows! If anyone has ideas of what I should do with my life I will probably do what you tell me to do! thx ;\ Oh also don't ask me why but one time I also wrote a full-length script for Rush Hour 4 where they go back in time and fight in the Civil War. I have no idea what I was thinking but here it is http://andything.fil...ush-hour-41.pdf The End 7 Share this post Link to post
xoValeriexo 4369 Posted May 18, 2014 Andy, I just finished reading all your Cracked articles. They're great! The very last thing I read might be my favorite part of all of them: "They were awful and vicious, you see, so there was some ironic appeal to naming them essentially 'the kittens.' It's like calling a big man 'tiny' or, more accurately, it's like calling 'rapist murdering war criminals' a bunch of 'sexy cats.' 3 Share this post Link to post
Andrew 4646 Posted May 18, 2014 Hey guys I couldn't donate any money this month (just bought a sick jet ski cash only) so my donation is a song. I made you guys a song to play to explain the Popcorn Gallery to guests. I worked really hard on it so definitely please use it. And please not in post... Please use it live so the guest can hear it too I think it will actually SAVE us all time. https://drive.google...dit?usp=sharing EDIT: And before anyone asks... No I actually haven't been classically trained as a singer! My church just says I have a knack for being on key. Too much talent in one body! Thanks the Lord Jesus Christ for my blessings! Loooooovved the song, very Billy Joel-esque. 1 Share this post Link to post
honlads 8798 Posted May 18, 2014 Tim, have you been classically trained as a singer? Edit: Ahh, nevermind. Should have read the whole post. PS Andy, I'm going to read the shit out of that Rush Hour 4 script. The thought that you did that is absolutely hilarious to me, so I can't not read it. 5 Share this post Link to post
RyanWright 713 Posted May 18, 2014 Andy Knees and VB brafrigginvo! I loved your writings, youve inspired me to attempt to get some of my own stuff together, of course the inspiration will not entitle either of you to any of the mega bucks I will surely be paid but you should still feel great Nothing really funny to say this morning as I am hungover but i found some kickass jamz at a party last night that i think you all would dig the guy's named D.D. Dumbo and all his songs are solo using a loop pedal. The second one is live so you can see the skillz, enjoy Peace, Love, Empathy 3 Share this post Link to post
Freja 1290 Posted May 18, 2014 I'm with agata, ya'll are super talented and make me lol a lot (dare I say more than greggy lols and you guys know that's a whole lot). Thelonious Junk: love those clips! Haven't heard his stuff before but I like it. If you're into loop pedally music you should check out my boyfriend (in my head), Kishi Bashi, specifically his 151a album! 4 Share this post Link to post
OcterDoctopus 1079 Posted May 19, 2014 Quick reminder that agata still hasn't fixed her jacked up spelling of SPIDER DASH MAN in this week's intro posting. 9 Share this post Link to post
RyanWright 713 Posted May 19, 2014 (edited) Freja awesome taste, I would wife Kishi Bashi up for sure. "I am the antichrist to you" had me bussin up in a sad way but i love it Going to see him in Durham June 10 niiiiccceee Edited May 19, 2014 by TheloniousJunk Share this post Link to post
